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My brother in law lives with my mother in law and does help take her to the doctor but he is using her credit card for meals and charging for everything. He has had her write him checks and just withdrew $2,100 for his car that they said was repossessed. He has been on drugs before and we think he is on them again.  My husband is in charge of her estate and I help pay her bills so I see all this on her bank statement. What can we do so that he doesn't spend all of her money?

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Who has POA?

Is he being paid a salary to caregive?
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texasteacher, sounds like your husband has financial Power of Attorney for his Mom. If Mom can no longer handle her finances, then it is time to take away her check book and credit cards. Then your husband's brother would have to go through your husband to get any money.

If Mom doesn't have any type of memory problems, sadly she can spend all her money the way she wants. All you can do is lecture to her that she needs to save her money for if she needs help later down the road. Sounds like she has been your brother-in-law's ATM machine for quite some time.
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No he does not. He lives there for free. His mom pays for his food and car insurance and car payment. She pays for him to eat out which is fine because he is there since she can't get around easily. It's just when he keeps spending $2000 or so a month for things he can't pay for and going through her money it is not good in case she does need to go to assisted living.
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One thought; through an elder care attorney, can you set up a caregiving contract so that brother is responsible for certain duties and paid for them?

Accounts should be changed so that he has no free access to them, as FF mentions.
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