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My brother was our step-grandfathers caregiver for 9 years. He recently put him in a nursing home because he was falling. Step-grandfathers lawyer has gone to nursing home and took copy of the Will, My cousin broke into the house that brother cohabitated with step grandfather. She took all brother paperwork and the will. We go to the courthouse, the will was picked up by the lawyer in Sept. Step-grandfather died in October. Brother was payee with Social Security Adm. My brother has no way of getting a copy of will. Can he put a lien on the house to recoup his losses, he paid property taxes, electric,water,sewer, cable, property insurance. The lawyer seems to be trying to steal this property from my brother. Is there any way that brother could petition the court to force lawyer to bring the will back to the courthouse. This has never gone into probate, the county attorney said it should have already been in probate. He told us if we could get copy of the will he would probate it. I don't know what to do?

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Falls are the major cause of elders being placed in long term care facilities, as they frequently suffer a fracture from a fall. No matter how good a care giver is, he/she cannot always prevent an elder from falling . Their balance is compromised and they tend to trip on even slight changes in floor surfaces(e.g. area rug to bare wood floors etc.) So I would not say that an elder's fall makes a care giver negligent. As for the rest of your brother's issues, consult an attorney.
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Sometimes putting someone in a nursing home is the most loving act, not a failure on the part of the caregiver. But that whole topic is beside the point of the post. There's some kind of fabulous mess there with the will and all. I bet no-one has a complete handle on what's really going on. Don't assume or speculate, work hard to get the clean facts, and get a lawyer.
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Please falls are very hard to prevent even if ur right there holding on to them. To imply that more then one fall is neglect is ridiculous. We r very lucky to date to only have one fall, after asking my mother numerous times if she would like to come in the kitchen with with me after she finished her breathing treatment she insisted she would just stay in living room, well she changed her mind and got up with out my help and fell. Elder doesn't always remember they need help and accidents happen. " ACCIDENTS" I have to. Cook, clean and do laundry, make beds along with being my mothers caregiver 24/7. I can't be at her side 24/7 I can however do my best to care for her and try to make sure she is safe, but I can't carry her on my hip when I'm fixing her meals or changing her bed clothes, doing her laundry, if I could I would. I am however with her 24/7 or there is someone here to relieve me, I get 8hrs a week off out of 168hrs in a week. I have no-one else here to help me. I hope u don't have more than one fall but don't imply neglect you don't what ur talking about
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Reverseroles – your comment "If he was caring for him he wouldn't fall" is unfair. Anyone who's been around the frail elderly for any amount of time knows that one thing is true. They fall. No amount of careful caregiving can stop that. Unless you restrict someone from standing up at all, they are at risk for falling.

diamons – I agree, more information is needed. If your brother has the resources, he should hire an elder law attorney. How was the house titled? Was he left the house in the will? Was the cousin mentioned in the will. Was the will ever filed? Only a lawyer could truly get to the bottom of all this, especially since it sounds like fighting it out with your cousin's attorney is involved.
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jeannegibbs, why would you say such a thing of "accusing us" as if you are all a group against me. All I meant was once a person is known as a fall risk you take the right precautions so that it doesnt continue. You are now accusing me and we are supposed to be supporting eachother. Accidents happen yes, but once you know, you handle it. It was said in this original statement that he "kept falling" and that is suspicious with one-on-one help right there with him. If your child fell down the stairs in his walker, wouldnt you make SURE it didnt happen again? I dont need more stress in my life right now, I am still in the caregiving stage and am here to help people, not accuse them. This wasnt about a caregiver here, it was about her brother.
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You say the house was willed to your brother a few years ago. You state the grandfather did not die until October. Did you mean your brother was put in the will a few years ago? How does your brother know he is mentioned in the will as receiving the house?
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diamons, you wrote "My brother had a car accident in the 90''s and he had multiple brain contusions. He doesn't understand everything like he did before the wreck.".... just curious why your brother, with such brain injuries, became the Caregiver to your Step-Grandfather?

As for the Will saying your brother would get the house, you need to check to see if Medicaid was used in the care of the Step-Grandfather.... if the answer is yes, then Medicaid gets the equity from the house when it is sold, in the mean time, Medicaid probably has a lien on the property.
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Reverseroles, you can baby proof the whole house, have a room full of nurses, and that elder will find some way to fall. There is nothing suspicious going on, it's just reality.
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Falling is something that can happen in the best of care situations. My mother got up in the middle of the night and fell, later that morning, she fell while I was in the bathroom. She had been placed on the sofa and was sleeping when I went into the bathroom less than 3 minutes, she was on the floor. They are quick when you aren't looking. Sometimes you must attend to nature. Middle of the night - even with a monitor on or sleeping in the same room, the fall occurs. It is unreasonable to expect someone to be aware every second of the day. I'm an only child an I have a part time paid caregiver and still she ends up on the floor through no fault of ours.
Now back to the cousin thing. File a "breaking and entering" police report. Be sure that you can prove it.
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One also has to consider that we have senior citizens taking care of their parents who are in their 90's.

If my parents were in their 90's when I was in my 40's or 50's, I could manage it with a ton of energy. Once I past that 60 year old mark, my health took a downward slide big time. Same with my sig other, his energy level is half gone. Sleeping on the floor, I would need an EMT to pick ME up :P
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