My brother is the primary caregiver for my Mom who is 79 with moderate dementia. My sister, myself and other brother come over everyday to help but we are not there 24/7
Today my brother is in a very bad mood and instead of telling him what a great job he is doing, or how hard it must be....
When he started going on about how he thinks this dementia is a "act" Mom is putting on. That she cares more for her dogs than herself. I tried to educate him about the way dementia impacts people. Of course she lights up and responds better when new people come over.. that is showtimers.
Anyway he just blew up and was yelling about it being an act and that Mom does know what she is doing.
I have suggested this site to him and offered books on dementia and dementia care to no avail.
I know I should have been compassionate and understanding but it scares me when he talks like this. saying "I am getting rid of Moms dogs as long as she pays more attention to them than she does to her own needs.
I know it was a mistake but I tired to tell him how lucky we are. My mom is kind, gentle, compliant, does what we ask and doesn't respond or fight back when he is yelling.
I will apologize later he won' hear me right now. But I am worried that his interactions with her are impacted by his belief that this is an act of some kind.