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For 3wks my 96 yr old Mother has been awake all night. I've read your wonderful suggestions, however, she is bedridden. I'm limited on tiring her physically. Hospice has been a Godsend. However, their combination of meds for agitation & sleep & trying them in different ways of dosing has no affect whatsoever! Normally, Mother's always had a low tolerance to everything. Even Tylenol would put her to sleep. But this Sundowners allows her to take enough meds that normally would put her out for days, to no avail! It has literally turned her into Jekyl & Hyde. By 10pm at night, she is extremely unsettled & worsens as the night goes on. When daylight breaks, calmness sets in. Hospice has ordered yet another medication to try in the same drug family as the failed ones. I'm unsettled putting all these drugs in her frail little body & yes, I tried Melatonin too. Any other input pertaining to our "unique" situation will be greatly appreciated🙏.

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I installed Phillips Hue lights in my mother in law's room. She recently moved into a room in the house with no windows and I program the lights to fade on and off at the same times every day, when she normally is waking up and getting tired anyway. This has helped a LOT with her sundowning. She still will get a little confused when she gets tired, but is more apt to calm down now.
Also, if you're mother is otherwise well cared for, letting her watch television or listen to music or do another quiet activity while safe in bed (and you get some sleep) doesn't sound bad. Will she let you leave her alone for long enough to get some sleep?
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Suze4wwjd Feb 2020
She lost complete interest in TV months ago. A huge surprise, being an avid Braves baseball & TN Vols fan, never missing televised games. She's now listening to a cd of hymns & cuddling a bear, both my Sister brought today because of the caring suggestions. For now, Mother is more content @this time of the night, in weeks & without medication. Such a blessing🙏.
A heartfelt thank you ... One & All !!!
Suze🙅
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Do not feel bad about the drugs. She is frail and there is nothing you can do about that. And although she looks like your mother, her brain is diseased and it's not really your mother inside that frail body. Do what you need to do to sleep and keep your sanity. Your mother is 96 and has already lived longer than average suggesting she way well make it to 100. You must do what's best for you to get through this phase, and I hope it's just a phase. My husband is a night owl and I am a light sleeper, who cannot imagine living with someone whose awake all night. At least my husband tries to be quiet.
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Suze4wwjd Feb 2020
Thank you so much for your kind & encouraging words. I realize I'm not alone in this. Blessings to you & this awesome forum of support.
Suze🙅
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What happened to all the rest of the answers that were here and are now gone??
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Sorry you're in such a tough situation.
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Suze4wwjd Feb 2020
Thank you for your kind & caring words. A blessing to know we're not alone in this difficult & heartbreaking ordeal we're forced to see Mother go thru😿.
Suze🙅
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So if she's bedridden she's safe in bed at night and can't get out, right? I think that you have to give yourself permission to leave her with some music or the radio or TV and plug your ears and sleep without feeling guilt, or if that is impossible hire a night sitter. ((hugs))
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Suze4wwjd Feb 2020
My Sister purchased a cd player today. Playing her fave church hymns now. Calmest Mother has been, at this hour of night, in weeks, so far🙏. Thank you so much for your caring comment & advice.
Suze🙅
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No first hand experience here, but I wanted you to know your post has been seen.

One thought, if she calms down at dawn, would a therapy lamp help?
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Suze4wwjd Feb 2020
Thanks for your thoughtful words & suggestion of a therapy lamp. Didn't know of them, but my sister & I are looking on line to purchase one for Mother, thanks to your input. Praying it helps. Worth a try. Blessings to you & yours.
Suze🙅
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