I confess I have not read all of the many questions & answers in this forum about dementia, so I may have missed something. My dad (age 94) has vascular dementia with short-term memory problems. He is in a MC facility where most of the other residents are far along in their conditions & many are non-verbal. He has been there since March, but before that was in the AL part & did well. He absolutely hates where he is & I get frequent calls from him about "I'm going crazy", "I don't know what to do", "I hate to bother you but you're all I've got", "I'm here all by myself", "It's very lonely" etc etc. I know he wants to live with me & my husband but after reading answers from the folks on this site, I've decided that I can't do that. He was kind of hard to live with before all this started - no hobbies, can't see or hear well to participate in any activities, & has to have staff help him with his phone, among other things. He calls me & whines & whines with the same desperate statements over & over. And with Covid, we can't visit in person, so I see him twice a week thru the window. He is on an antidepressant & an anti-anxiety med.
I exercise & do a little volunteer work & am on mood meds myself. I was handling this pretty well, but lately the guilt is tremendous. I don't sleep well & I have this on my mind constantly. I don't want to hurt his feelings, but I'm about ready to tell him off! (NOT!) My brother lives 3 hours away & is as involved as one can be given the distance & Covid.
I would like to know if anyone knows if there are facilities that have levels of MC - with residents that can still converse & interact with others. The places I know of around here seem to put all MC residents together & treat them all the same. I plan on researching other local facilities. Would a care home be better for him?