Are evenings in memory care like a ghost town usually?

Most facilities do reduce staff in the evening hours, but that shouldn't mean residents must retire for the night at a particular time. Does the staff escort the residents to their room or do they freely wind up there after supper? I doubt if the latter is true. The staff may have to help some one to their room in the evening, but then they should be there to get some sleep, to be helped into bed, if necessary, and to be tucked in, not to be placed in a chair or on the edge of the bed to finish out the evening.

Dementia does take a toll on a person's energy and some might be ready to sleep after supper, but they'll probably be up at 1 AM. Just like you and me, the wake sleep cycle for MC residents is different for each. In fact, when the disease progresses, the circadian clock no longer functions as it once did. The person can't differentiate day from night. At times, my wife was awake for 24 straight hours. She might wake up at 2 AM, get dressed and want to get the day started. Facilities that dictate times to sleep and times to awaken aren't doing the residents any favors. Some residents may voluntarily go to their rooms and hit the sack. Others may be awake long after dinner and just wander around or sit on a couch in the common area, or even fall asleep there. I don't know of a facility that offers activities in the evening, but that's no excuse to put everyone to bed early. What many care facilities lack is person centered care. Knowing each resident and catering to each's lifestyle as much as possible.

I can't speak to memory care but at our nursing home the majority of activities were scheduled in the afternoon, with memory care there is the added complication of sundowning so evening activities are going to be more complicated. I also think many facilities like to administer evening meds at meal time because compliance is better and it's easier to get to everyone when they are corralled in the dining room, and sometimes those meds are sedative. Don't forget they are likely getting people up and about by 6:00 a.m. (or earlier) to get them washed, toileted and dressed for breakfast.

I suppose it depends on the facility but I know of a memory care facility that even allows overnight guests.

I know of an assisted living facility that has a guest room for out of town visitors.

Some have a relaxed ‘open door’ policy but ask that visitors are courteous of other residents, while some have
visiting hours end at 8:00.

There isn’t one set of rules. It varies.

Imho, while most elders eat a much earlier dinner than normal, the staff is no doubt waking patients up as early as 6 AM to start the day.

Seniors get up very early in those facilities, so they need to go to bed earlier.
Also, most elderly people have "wound down" by supper time and don't have the energy to attend activities in the evening.

If a person is sundowning, their confusion would make it appropriate for them to attend a group activity, such as Bingo, because they could not follow the instructions or behave socially. It would not make them "less confused," since the confusion is biologically based.

All facilities, including hospitals, have a lot less going on during the evenings, compared to days.

You're lucky if a facility is staffed with enough help during the day..

Horribly sad for all the Seniors to have no contact with lived ones for over a year because they totally didn't get much human contact except for necessities.

I personally think it was wrong and made it worse on them that they will never get over.

People aren't made to be alone.

Prayers

Some facilities may show a movie or have occasional evening activities. I think most of the time the residents may want to be in their own spaces after dinner. Is there a common area where she can sit with others, including staff, if she wants to be with people?

All facilities have less staff in the evenings since daytimes are pretty full of therapy, activities, housekeeping... However, there should be enough staff to meet needs of the residents. Evening activities may depend on the amount of residents, the type of problems residents have (dementia clients need more structured routine while residents with mobility issues need more adaptive activities), and the resources available. Before COVID, most facilities had at least 1-2 group activities for residents in the evenings. With COVID, large group activities are frowned on. Almost every facility has somebody responsible for resident activities. Talk to this person about options for your mom. The facility should be willing to help you out.

This is sort of a side issue, but I see in many of the comments that staff in MC tend to wake up residents early, like 6 AM. Why? That would work fine for me because I am always up early anyway, but it would drive my husband crazy. Each of us have internal clocks that work differently. I am an early person but my husband and my 2 children (by a different husband) have always tended to be night owls and sleep late. Given that there is basically nothing they must do, why not let the night owls sleep in until 10 or so? I would think that it would ease the mornings considerably if the staff had a quarter or so of the residents to awaken at each of the 4 morning hours rather than rushing through getting them all up at once. My experience with late risers is that they have little interest in breakfast, anyway. They prefer coffee or juice and little else, maybe dry toast. After all, when you get up at 10, lunch isn't far off. Call it brunch for the late risers. Surely such regimentation and lack of appreciation for individuality is not great for those whose lives are already confused and confusing.

I’m sorry that is happening for your mother. Not all facilities are like that. My mother is in one that keeps residents in the common area almost all of their waking hours. Admittedly, there is some sleeping in chairs during movies or tv shows. It has made a world of difference in Mom’s orientation to reality and her social needs. We’re in NW Ohio.

I believe that different facilities have different views about "living" after dinner. Some keep taking wonderful wonderful care of the person ( not just the body) after regular week-day office hours.
Sadly, where my mom is, there is nothing after dinner. There a a few chairs in the common living room and a big tv, but it is never turned on. I bought some DVDs , that I know many of the residents enjoy, but they disappeared and were never played. I was told that there is ALWAYS someone at the nurses station but it is absolutely not so. Halls is a ghost town. There is less staff in the evening and they are all busy in the residents appartements. I often wondered alone with my mom , sometimes calling out hello hello because I needed something but got no answer. If it had been urgent I could have phoned the nurse and she would have responded from where she was. I favor the approach to respect each resident habits, and some do like to rest by themselves in their room ou appartement,. But for those who are still more active and want to socialise, it breaks my heart to see them wondering alone, or ending up all alone in their appartemetn loooking at the walls. Some can't remember how to turn on their tv. I say "built it and they will come", if the tv was on in the common room, with nice music or something the residents enjoy, they would benefit from it. I talked many many times to the head nurse but ...
I sometimes wonder about the expression "assisted LIVING" , maybe "medical care facility" or "day living/evening existing" would be a better term for some facilities.
As for the explanation/excuse based on " there is less staff", well...how about phrasing it, " we choose to not provide staff at night for this ".
I wonder what the owners of these facilities do after dinner...
Maya Angelou says, "I did then what I knew how to do, now that I know better, I do better". Moving my mom now is not justified and would be awful for her ( day care is ok), but next time I would ask the questions differently. I heard someone saying to ask " what EXACTLY is the daily routine, at night, on week-ends, on Holidays" and not " are there activities" , the answer to that last phrasing not meaning much if the answer is "of course, we have bingo, singing all kind of different things" ( not mentioning that it is twice a week for 30 min...).

I have heard in nursing homes that they use the time after dinner for bathroom breaks and to get residents ready for bed because they are short-staffed then and everyone seems to need help at the same time. I once watched the call buttons light up during that time for a staff of 2 covering 40 beds. They would put people on the toilet and tell them to pull the cord when ready. That resident could be waiting for 45 minutes for help to get off the toilet. I would think this staffing issue might be addressed by some of the better, more current practices but good help is hard to find.

As a former LTC Activity Director, I can tell you most programs are held late morning and mid afternoon. That is when you have highest rate of participation. Have held entertainment , games and motion picture shows in after dinner hours, but majority of residents do not attend. Think most residents ready to end their day after supper time. We do try to provide for evening activities. However, think of what most elders actually do in the evenings, even those at home. Also think two activity programs daily would be more than this population does when at home! We cannot be constantly busy! It is also good to have alone time and rest periods.