Follow
Share

Started at 10 am. I knew, nothing truly wrong. Pain in stomach and left side (Later changed to right side).


Absolutely perfect day before, up sitting, ate huge breakfast, working on puzzle at puzzle table all day.


Called ambulance. Oscar performance how awful she felt.


In ER from 11:30-4pm.


I got to ER, nurse told me she said, has had pain for a week!!! I said, this morning, first I heard of it.


EKG fine, blood work fine, CT of abdomen fine. Discharged.


This situation has happened many times. Not abdominal pain per se…..” I HAVE TO GO TO THE HOSPITAL!”.


Is it fear of death? Like the hospital could prevent death?

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Find Care & Housing
What happened with the hospice evaluation? Hospice avoids these unnecessary trips to the ER and makes life much easier for all involved.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

I haven't had to deal with it first hand, but a friend of mine did with her husband. He did have some health issues, but none of them were out of control or needed immediate attention when he would declare that he needed to go to the ER.
After spending all day in the ER complaining about how long everything as taking and completing a battery of tests, he would be released. It occurred at least once a month, usually every couple of weeks. He became known as a frequent flyer in the ER.

She thinks that he liked the extra attention he got there, or he just wanted a change of scenery for awhile. It got so common that she would go to the ER with him, help him get checked in, make sure they had her contact information and then leave. If she stayed there, she would just have to listen to his incessant complaining and he would get nasty to her. The hospital or her husband would call her when he was discharged.

There were maybe 2 or 3 instances where he had a legitimate medical reason to go there.
Edit to add - I should state that her husband was in his 70's and didn't have dementia, so it may not apply to your situation.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Yes, there are old aged hypochondriacs. The caregiver has to have certain knowledge about assessing a medical situation. Hypochondriacs love hospitals. They suffer from " hospitalitis".
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

Pain? panic? Pain AND panic?
So hard to know...

If happening a lot.. I suppose I would do a few home tests & make a call to Emergency/Nurse on Call type service first?

I think certain heart issues & extreme BP can cause panic. I know low oxygen can.

BP monitor & those finger O2 monitors with heart rate could be handy.

I'd ask the Doctor what you could check at home, what is normal range for her & what evokes an ER visit.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

My mother did that. She had some things wrong with her but going to the ER was attention to her and probably she regarded it as a social life of sorts. One time she had a little red spot in the white of her eye and insisted she go even though it was clearly not an emergency and her nurse friend had said not to worry about it. No pain. We all sat around the ER hovering in attendance. Doctor saw her, said it was nothing and sent her home. She says, he was a nice young doctor but he never even touched me. Case closed. She just wanted the attention.
Helpful Answer (4)
Report
gladimhere Apr 2022
Maybe streaming old.General.Hospital episodes would satisfy her?😏😏
(2)
Report
Tell her how much that ambulance ride is going to cost.
Helpful Answer (3)
Report
Fawnby Apr 2022
That doesn’t always work. As they get older, money sometimes seems irrelevant. They think so what, Medicare pays. Or something. FYI, last relative who went to the ER fell and ambulance took to the ER. Total bill? $15,000. Paid by Medicare and Military retiree insurance.
(2)
Report
Perhaps you should ask for a 72 hour psych hold evaluation and/or COVID testing. Maybe after that experience the hospital wouldn't seem like such a good place she wants to visit.

Some of use wish with ours that they actually ask to go to the hospital. We could then actually help them better with the wait of them having a really bad emergency to get them evaluated.

You might also tell her medicare has limited the number of visits to the ER unless she is unconscious. :-)
Helpful Answer (4)
Report

Attention, afraid to live, afraid to die. My mother was having panic attacks at night after her slight stroke, she was calling the EMT's three or four times a week, they started charging her $650 per ride, that ended that, it was a miracle, panic attacks stopped, although my brother and I used that as our open door to move her into AL.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report
venting Apr 2022
It's interesting how being aware of a price tag, miraculously makes you healthy again (no panic attacks) (even though they were real; your mother wasn't having fake panic attacks). Same strategy Glad suggested below.

I bet this tactic would work for many people, for other areas of life, too. Being aware of X price, you suddenly start doing well in life; some problems miraculously disappear because you don't want to pay X.

I'm going to experiment on myself. Dear Venting, if you continue doing Y, the price will be X. Hope this abruptly stops you. Sincerely, Venting
(3)
Report
See 1 more reply
My 92-yr old mother is a retired RN and still has plenty of her mind left. This past year she insisted I take her to the ER for a pain high up on her right side. When asked if this could be constipation, she was insistent that it wasn't and indignent that I'd even suggest that (since she has IBS and not the constipation kind).

Several hours and some imaging later: diagnosis was constipation.

How can a seasoned nurse be fooled? Not to mention that her older sister went through the exact same thing last summer while we were all together visiting in FL. I think in some instances when someone is very elderly, they are worried that every little pain can be "The Big One Elizabeth" (Sandford and Son reference for you non-Boomers). And nurses just know "too much".
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

Attention. EMTs arrive, they fuss over her, she goes to hospital. they fuss over her. She hopes she will be admitted, if so, fuss over her. She can stay in bed watch tv and have nurses and other medical personnel wait on her.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report
Arimethea33 Apr 2022
Don’t forget, “ SHE LIKES THE CHOCOLATE ICE CREAM IN A CUP IN THE ICU”.
Its totally about attention, I know that.
Last admission, December 2021, they kept her ONE day!!!!
(1)
Report
This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter