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Mom is 94 and wants to go to the hospital for every tiny thing. There have been so many false alarms that we stopped being concerned about it. But at that age we are scared that we may not recognize the real thing from the fake one. With Covid -19, we cant go in with her. We just have to drop her off at the ER. I worry that she will get sick being around the Hospital so much. She doesn't care about Covid -19 . She is more important than it is.
Constantly wanting something from the Store, or fast food take out, insists on seeing the Dr in person , no zoom visits.
Today she called a taxi and went to the ER on her own. My husband and I were both home and available. I was in the kitchen when I heard the front door open and close. At the same time my husband was coming in the back door, so I was surprised to see him because I thought it was him at the front. Then it hit me. So, I told him to run and check the front. Sure enough she was getting into a cab. He got there just in time to ask where she was going. She answered "The Hospital". When he ask why, she replied "It doesn't matter" What is that supposed to mean? Should we talk to her Dr about some other form of treatment for her or ourselves?

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deardarla, instead of going to the Hospital, take your Mom to Urgent Care. She would get seen quicker and get the same amount of attention without sitting forever in the waiting room. Unless she enjoys watching the other people coming and going within the hospital.

If it turns out your Mom likes seeing other people at the hospital, maybe it is time for her to move to Independent Living at a senior facility, if she can budget for that. My Dad did that and he had wished he would have moved years earlier. He enjoyed being around so many people closer to his generation, as there was so much to talk about regarding their past. Plus the facility had a nurse on duty 24 hours a day.
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Wish I could get my mother to go. She thinks that Vicks Vapor Rub cures everything, and if it doesn't Aspercream will. I had to force her to go when I saw her with huge hives all over her face and neck, and she still hasn't stopped yelling at me about it. Of course, she is just a few months shy of 99, so maybe she's on to something!
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Totally agree with  Alva and NeedHelpWithMom.   She sounds scared, worried, and probably has some higher levels of anxiety.
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NeedHelp's "she sounds scared" I think hit the nail on the head. I think, if this is the same ER, then the ER personnel and Social Services, if you are listed POA, is going to be contacting you. In fact likely to contact the listed next of kin. Hopefully then something can be worked out.
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NeedHelpWithMom Nov 11, 2020
Alva,

I do understand the stress that the poster is going through. I think all caregivers do.

I wonder if the poster is her mom’s POA. Yes, hopefully it will get sorted out.

Covid on top of everything wrecks everyone’s nerves!
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She sounds scared. It is hard getting on in years. I would be concerned about Covid though too. Things are so different now.

This is pre Covid. One time my mom kept saying that she didn’t feel right. I could tell that she was scared.

I took her to the hospital and her blood pressure was very low. They discontinued her BP meds. Mom knows when something is off or different.

It’s so hard to know when it’s serious or not. I had lots of trips to the doctor and hospital with my mom, also in her nineties, with Parkinson’s disease. My mom has mobility issues so there are falls. Many trips to the hospital were fall related. She is now under hospice care.
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I’d let her take her hospital trips, seems she needs the attention or reassurance she gets there. Someone will contact you if there’s a serious issue. It’s wonderful that’s she’s capable of taking a cab, so don’t stand in her way. And don’t provide her trips to places she can do on her own. Covid is everywhere, take your own precautions and ask her to wash up when she comes home, that’s all any of us can do
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First , I have to say how blessed you are that your mom at 94 is still able to go and do as she pleases. Good for her. Perhaps she looks at her going to the hospital as an "outing", since she probably hasn't been able to do much since Covid. She probably enjoys the attention and care she receives when she's there.

If you are able to, I would still talk to her Dr, just to make sure nothing serious is going on with her, and he might be able to offer some suggestions. Good luck.
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