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Michael, your uncle and your cousin have reached out to you in the hope of brokering a reconciliation with your brother because he is dying, and I expect they would like to see the two of you mend fences before it is too late.

The thought of it makes you angry. Your reaction to this olive branch malarkey is "get stuffed" and I can understand that. But when you've got past your first reaction to their ?suggestion ?hope ?sermon, give some thought to how you would like to have left things with your brother when it's forever.

You may feel no different, you may still think "just so long as I never have to think about him again I'm fine with that." But... maybe not. There is a very wide gap between (still quite angry) no contact at one end of the scale, and taking responsibility for his care at the other; and there is lots of room for good things like forgiveness and peace of mind in between.

If the uncle and cousin persist and it annoys you, explain to them that they don't understand the complexity of the picture and you'll think it over in your own good time - if they'd leave you in peace to do that, please.
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MICHAELMWB Dec 2019
appreciate your opinions.
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I think that your brother hasn't reached out to you, so you don't need to worry about it.

When I was no contact with a family member and a cousin said, ya know knothead would love to talk to you. Really, then why haven't they called? I am not the one that said buzz off, but I buzzed off because that was the last thing said to me. I wasn't believing that there was a desire for reconciliation because this person was a blabbermouth and would say just anything and not mean it. Didn't hear anything for almost a year.

If he wants to reconcile then he needs to reach out and initiate the process, not use a via.
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I am also so angry at an older brother that I cannot imagine any circumstances under which I would ever want to speak with him again. I'm pretty sure he feels the same about me. Let my other siblings be more compassionate if they want to; they didn't have to go through what I did.
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