My 80-year-old husband has Alzheimer's/dementia; he's on Donepezil and Celexa; I can handle caring for him during the day just fine but at night it's very difficult; he's always had a couple of drinks in the evening, but now, with these meds(?), only two drinks but he has more shots in a 24 oz glass, and he's fallen (with a walker) several times; I can't stand him drunk and slept on the couch last night. He won't go to AL, but how do we stop the alcohol; he knows it's not good! Could alcohol mixed with these meds cause him to get drunk quicker. He didn't used to get this bad.
And if he continues to drink then stick to your guns and get him placed.
He's an alcoholic who can't get along without his booze. He's inebriated, which contributes to his falling, though since he has dementia, he'd probably fall anyway even without the alcohol. Expect a lot more falls.
You must take this up with his doctor! Did you know that drinking alcohol contributes to memory loss? Did your husband know that? Be honest with the doctor; something tells me that husband has been enabled for a long time so that he could continue his addiction, and doctor may not know the extent of it. The enabling needs to stop. Who supplies the booze?
Someone is going to advise you to go to Al-Anon meetings to help yourself cope with his alcoholism. But he has dementia, and it's not that easy for you to get out to go to meetings because he shouldn't be left alone. So that may not be practical.
Someone else will probably suggest AA for him, but he's not going to want to go. Also, since he has dementia, working the AA steps or understanding and retaining information he gets at the meeting is not likely.
At some point, he'll have a really bad fall, which means hospital, rehab, and after that back home where you'll take care of him, or he'll go to a skilled nursing facility where someone else will. I'm so sorry you're having to deal with this, but it's a familiar story and that's the trajectory.
Your husband is self-medicating. It's time for you to attend Al-Anon, and time for hubby to go to AA meetings if he will.
There is very little you can do to control access to alcohol OR to control drinking in another individual.
If your husband fully understands that you may not stand by to witness a descent into alcoholism, nor to deal with an alcoholic, he may accept help. Of course he may NOT! You may be left with a very difficult decision for yourself.
I'm 82 and aware that taking up alcohol is going to have my bottom on the cement; our balance just becomes trash as we age, and can't take alcohol without serious spills. Falling is often the beginning of the end for us seniors.
I wish you both the best of luck. You'll get wonderful suggestions/helpful support at a community at Al-Anon. I PROMISE you that.
Alcohol and dementia doesn't mix.
There are Al-Anon online and telephone meetings available.
Now, her dementia has progressed naturally and some days she likes me, some days she hates me. I didn't give her dementia. She is in a safe place with nice people keeping an eye on her. (Sometimes they're prostitutes too. Oh well.)
There's only so much you can do! A person with dementia cannot be in charge of himself, and there is no "happy" dementia patient. Just safe or unsafe ones.
Be kind to yourself. You are doing the best you can and nobody is cut out for this job.
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