I feel I'm drowning. To much to handle, what should I do to help ME?? Been dealing with this alcoholism for four years, been caregiving just as long consistently. I need a life. I come home and sit.. watch him get drunk, and play on the computer. For literally 5 hours. My caregiving job is chaotic. I want a nice dinner out, or go bowling anything!!! I'm hanging by a thin thread, I deal with a lot at work and come home to an emotionally unattached person. Don't have a lot of friends either cause of his drinking. I know I'm way off topic... but both go hand and hand with my mood.
This is one of the saddest things I've read here.You need some friends BECAUSE of his drinking. A gal pal you can have lunch with or see a movie with. Or an activity or hobby that you enjoy. Anything to not sit around and watch him get drunk all evening.
I'm a recovering alcoholic (it will be 17 years tomorrow that I got sober) and for every alcoholic there is usually a co-dependent trailing along not far behind. That's were Alanon comes in. It would be a great place for you to learn the skills you need to be able to stay sane while living with an alcoholic and you'll meet some amazing people and make great friends.
You are on the right path, looking for a way to help yourself. You can not help anyone else if you can't help yourself. Keep up the good work. :-)
If you've seen any of my comments, I take care of a schizophrenic bed ridden patient. Sometimes days are good, some are bad. I'm so sick of dealing with "everyone" and not having anyone.... Ahhhh. Thanks for letting me vent..