I'm alarmed by my mom's loss of appetite. What should we do?

Xina, even before my mom had a stroke, when she was still living at home, she went from her usual 140 lbs. down to 110 for no apparent reason. Doc said that it can just be part of the aging process. Also, apparently your taste buds dwindle as you age.

Did she have a swallow test after the stroke?

Xinabess, don't forget that your mother is forced to be much less active than she was, so naturally her body needs fewer calories. It may be a good thing that her appetite has diminished, within reason.

If you, like me, like to have actual numbers to work with, you could ask a dietitian what your mother's Base Metabolic Requirement (BMR) should be. Then you can keep tabs on whether she's getting enough fuel to keep body and soul together :)

Remember she's not as active to work up an appetite so won't get hungry. Mine was late coming also. I went from 120 to 80lbs and can't get any back. With the weight loss I can't hold as much food as before. I also would comment I may as well eat the box as the food. It had no taste.

It is completely natural to eat less and less as you age...focus on the most healthy, and favorite foods of hers...
My dad eats like a horse, yet still is losing weight...and when my mom didn't eat at all, her body told us she was getting ready to go, so that is a big indicator.
Talk to her about it, be transparent, and ask HER if she feels to go back to the dr. It's the one thing elders can control...being poked and prodded is no joke at that age, one becomes more sensitive than ever on all levels...

Also, be sure not to try to force her to eat.

When does this weight loss and lack of appetite occur? I am almost 80 and still have a very healthy appetite, and have recently gone on a diet to lose 25 lbs.

My mother is 81. When she came here four years ago to live with me, she started to lose her appetite, and got down to about 85 pounds. I was doing all I could to get her to eat more than a few bites of anything, including ice cream, pudding, all the treats she would eat, and the Boost or Ensure drinks. She put some of the weight back on, maybe 10 pounds.
Three months ago I moved her to assisted living. Last week we went for her quarterly doctor's visit, and he was happy that she was up to 106, and so was I.
So perhaps because the aides bring everyone the same serving sizes, and that she is in a communal dining area, that she is eating more. I do make sure she has her ice cream, and pudding, and nutrition drinks in her refrigerator in her apartment also, and she is either eating them well, or giving them out to friends. Whatever it is, we are all happy to see this sign that she is thriving under the care of the folks at the ALF.

Well, a nurse is coming to evaluate her for continued home care next week, so I'll ask her about that.

I guess sneaking an antidepressant into her meds is not the right thing to do for her mood. Her affect is so flat and the look in her eyes is so blank. She still enjoys her few visitors. The one thing she really enjoys lately is having me google things and people and listening to me read about them. Today we started with Joan of Arc and somehow ended up with Watergate!

Alzheimer's and dementia can cause weight loss, as well as, rheumatoid arthritis. At mom's age she can have anything she wants to eat. She will not touch Ensure or Boost. The goal is getting her weight up. I've done it. From 80 to 95. Her doctors are thrilled. She loves chocolate. She enjoys Milka chocolate covered oreo candy bars. Chocolate ice cream, pie. Because she has Alzheimer's she's a sugar-holic. I buy her gossip magazines, hand her those, one of her candy bars and a big glass of milk. What a treat! Her blood tests are perfect. I give her small portions of good food for meals. I gradually crank back the treats and up the meals. This is what works for her. Slow and steady wins the race. Ask her doctor first. My mom is 88.

You really need to bring this up to your doctor. It could be caused by another condition such as a UTI, or Gerd. Although my Grandma has the same problem because of her dementia. What we do is let her eat what she wants, and then take it away. Then a couple minutes later we bring it back telling her its dinner time. The second time and third time we feed her, instead of letting her feed herself. We've been able to get her to eat a little more that way, because she forgets that she had just eaten. In the past 2 months she has gone from 170 to 150 and still losing weight. I'm not saying that food trick will work for you, but it's worth a shot to try and get her eating a little bit more. My Grandma only takes 3-5 bites of food at a time, then she refuses anymore. I know she's 91 and doesn't require a lot of food, but any food is better than no food. Something that she might enjoy is pouches of fruit sauce such as Beach nut's fruites on the go. The cost around $1 each, but they have a ton of fruits, and she drinks it rather than having to use a spoon or fork. Or try ensures. Both of those have been life savors for me.