After the loss of your spouse. Any suggestions to help with this loss?

First of all, I am so, so terribly sorry about the loss of your dear husband. My husband and I have been married nearly as long, and I can truly empathize with the jarring change in your life the loss of your life partner and apparent soulmate must be. Do you have a good support system of both family and friends? I say both because it is important not to just surround oneself with just one or the other. If you are involved with a church, this is the time to let them know you will appreciate their prayers, but also company when appropriate. Are you involved in any hobbies, or outside the home activities? If not, again...when the time is right....volunteering can be both incredibly heartwarming and provide time away from your home and thoughts of your recent loss. Give yourself the time you need to grieve, and in your way. No two people grieve in the same manner, nor in the same time. You just lost your husband....you have every right to do what feels right to you at this moment in time, so I urge you to let yourself do whatever gives you respite, and perhaps some pleasure. I'm sure your dear husband would want you to find joy and fulfillment in the life you still have before you. Sending hugs, and prayers for comfort to you. 🤗🙏

I’m so very sorry 😢 I to am facing the loss of my husband . We’ve been together 33 yrs married only 8 of those .
I just brought him back home from the VA they give him hours or a day or two
there’s absolutely no easy fix to this situation as we have cared and loved them for so long we must consider their quality of life and their comfort . We can’t be selfish and keep holding onto
them. I wanted a feeding tube and IV fluids the Drs refused . He can’t go on life support or be shocked nor can they fur chest compressions due to a 9.8 aorta aneurism he has covid which has complicated all his other health issues.
i lost my first husband to brain cancer , now Rick has dementia and Parkinson’s and many other problems.
All we can do is remember who they once were. What they loved to do or watch on TV . Remember the loving days spent together , But know they are now happy , healthy Young again . No longer will they ever be sick or in pain they won’t have to face a world that’s declining where there’s such bitterness and hatred . Yes we are left behind this is the hardest thing I’ve gone through , I know he’s hungry and thirsty but he can no longer swallow and I’m told it’s selfish and almost cruel to keep him clinging to life. They want him to just get morphine to help him pass in somewhat comfort .
it’s heart breaking laying next to
him rubbing his head holding his hand until he takes his last breath.
But I know when Jesus calls him home he will be welcomed into Gods kingdom so I will thank God for the time he kept us together . I’ll thank God he’s no longer suffering . How glorious to know how forgiving and loving Jesus is
So continue to pray , give praise to Jesus for dying on the cross so we might be saved . I will miss my husband so much but he will always be a part of me ,
I pray you find peace and I hope you have family and friends to support you. There are many out here who have lost spouses and each of us goes through it in. Different way . God keep you in his loving arms and sends his angels to be around you through these coming months . God bless 🙏🙏🙏💕😢

sorry for your recent loss. I am sure you will just need time. do you have a picture of your spouse, set it out, talk to them (this is what my mother did with her husband of 74 years that passed away in 2020). she would tell him every day what was going on. I am sure it made her feel a little bit like he was still there. let yourself grieve and in time you can fill that emptiness with volunteer work. i know people that jump right into something because they don't want to deal with the pain of the loss, but i think our bodies/soul need time to grieve then move forward (in your own time) to volunteer at a shelter, animal shelter, library, check your local chamber of commerce they might know of some places that can use help. i wish you luck.

I wish there was something I could say to console you. I lost my husband of 31 years in May 2020 and I still miss him tremendously. He too had a difficult time in his last months and so every time I wish he was still here I realize that it is unfair of me as he had already given me as much as he could. A dear friend who was already a widow told me that eventually, I wouldn't hurt quite so badly and it would no longer be 100% of the time. She was right and even though there are times when I cry for his loss, I know he wouldn't have wanted me to be unhappy for the rest of my life. He would want me to make a new life for myself and I am trying to. I know also that he was the love of my life and that no one will ever replace him in my heart. I often think of the Beatles song, In My Life. It has such lovely lyrics and I know, in my life I loved my husband more. Keep your chin up, Dear Friend, it will get easier.

This loss is so new and raw. Let yourself go through grief on your own timeline. When you feel up to it, try to get out of the house now and then. I think aimlessly walking around the house, not knowing what to do with yourself is exhausting.

Books on grief can be helpful. When you can read for pleasure, try reading again. Take care of yourself. Eat better, nap, exercise a little, take time to focus on you, even if it is just a little something here and there. Your grief will change slowly and you will know this as time passes. Some recommend writing in a journal. You can look back and see how far you have come.

I have had many losses in my life and it is not easy but here is what I did and it helped me. First of all, be glad you were blessed by someone and be grateful. Not all of us are that lucky. When you feel like it, cry and cry some more. Over time the memories will slowly fade and you will start thinking of the good times. I have photographs on my wall and I see my loved ones and talk to them and it is now nearly 60 years later - I will be 88 - but I have some peace which I did not have until I did this.

I would try to stay away from the house or keep busy doing hobbies or get more connected with a grief group or a community project to help with this awful feeling.