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I feel guilty asking these questions as my Mom is still with my, but I am trying to plan ahead for emotional and financial reasons . Moms funeral is all pre-paid, she did it many years ago. I am her full time caregiver in my home, her Executer of her Will, DPOA, Trustee, and on her Health Care proxy. I have documented and accounted for every dime spent of my Moms money just in case of nasty sibling issues. Anyone know what happens after death as far as my duties? Do I need a lawyer to give the siblings my documentations, the Trust, Will, etc, or do I just mail it to them? There is no money left, only her monthly money which zeros out monthly. All was to be divided equally but there is no money in anything, Will her pre paid funeral need hundreds of dollars in flowers, newspaper costs,etc? I just do not know what to expect, at all. This is on my mind, also how I do not want to even see my siblings and I fear arguments at the funeral. I sure hope they dont start anything. Its going to be private and I almost wish I didnt even have to tell them as they have hardly any time for her when she is alive. Do I get pictures and a ulogy ready? I know nothing really and any help is much appreciated. Thank you.

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We did take Mom to pre-plan her funeral. If your mom is housebound, ask the funeral home to send someone to the house. Mom was quite happy to plan everything out exactly the way she wanted it. You get to know the cost up front. Our mom is donating her body to a nearby medical school, she has the picture she wanted for the obit, the obituary is written. When she dies, we call the school, they pick up the body and later return the ashes. NO COST for that. All that leaves is the memorial service at her church and the newspaper charge for publishing the obituary. We did opt to have the funeral home bury the ashes in her plot, arrange for the headstone which she gets as a veteran's wife. There will be no wake and no need for flowers. Just as she wants it. If there is no wake, there are no fights at the wake, right? You can pre-write the Eulogy and she can edit the content as well as decide who she wants to read it.
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My mom has expressed her wishes and we know what they are; she wants a funeral but it is really just my brother and I and we see no point. We will have her buried with my father with headstone engraved. No Mass, no funeral, no obit. She would like a show and we let her believe she will have one; but we don't intend to plan or execute one. We will use the money that would be spent on all the other and have a quiet family getaway at a later point to honor her memory privately. My mom wanted the whole nine yards for my dad; and we did it for her but it was wasteful and ridiculous and seemed like a big show for nothing. Yes, many relatives came and it was a family reunion of sorts, but family reunions should have occurred long before death -- when they could have been enjoyed.

In my opinion, do what you want.
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Your DPOA authority ends with the death of your Mom. Then the executor role kicks in. Since you serve in both capacities, it may seem like it is all one big role. But there are some differences. You mention no assets being left but you also allude to a trust. If there is a trust, who is the administrator or responsible party fro the trust.

After your Mom passes and the funeral is complete, gather an inventory of her assets. Visit your county surrogate court. (Actually, you can contact them now if time permits. They often have pamphlets that describe your duties as executor of the will. If the trust holds assets, you can inquire about that as well.

Some people like to hire an attorney to handle the estate, but for one as simple as you describe, you may be able to handle it on your own.

When time was near for my loved one, I dragged the executor (kicking and screaming) to the funeral home to assure we had everything in place. I was POA. There were things that had to be cleared up and I was glad we could do it without the pressure of the death. You can also draft the obit and review it before publication. Enjoy the time you have left with your Mom. We are thinking of you.
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DPOA duties end with her death. Most of her funeral expenses have been prepaid. Sometimes the cost of the obituary is included in the prepayment. You need to read the pre-paid funeral contract to see what is covered, it should be itemized. As executor and trustee you only need to keep the heirs informed as you go through the probate process which in your case should not be too difficult since there is very little of assets. I would highly recommend seeking legal advise if you can afford it to help you through the probate process. You may want to let your siblings know ahead of time about your mother's financial situation. You are not obligated to send them anything, but if it keeps the peace you can send them copies of monthly reports on your mother's finances. I am in the same situation as you (minus fulltime caregiver), but luckily my siblings are not greedy.
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I sure don't know but will be interested to find out what people say. The one sibling I have I am estranged from and it's so bad I won't even want to make the phone call with the news when the time comes. :(
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Thank you all or writing. geewiz, the Trust is gone, it was her house money and I used it all for her care.(lawyer approved) I am the Trustee also and able to see her home for her care money while I was still working fulltime. There is now nothing except her monthly ss and va that I use for her care and supplies. I guess I do need to call the funeral home to see what she did already up there. I feel like you sunflo why go through it all, she has no one left to come other than my siblings who rarely come now while she is alive! I have a fear of how she will die, and how I will make it through that and through seeing a sibling whom makes me sick to my stomach just at the sight of her. I know that sounds crazy but she accused me of false things that cost $4,000 of money, time and stress to prove her wrong, yup, shes one of those. Ya know, the ones who say everything, always have an opinion, but never help. Thanks ALL !
RR
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Sell her home (above)
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