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My siblings are requesting an accounting of my mom's finances - because I am the POA - but my mom is still perfectly capable of making her own financial decisions and does not want this information shared. She has overseen everything, but, for example, does not go to the store and make the actual transaction - I do that for her.


Would a court require an accounting if she doesn't want her info shared?

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Your POA only is effective if Mom is proven not to be able to handle her finances. Since your Mom is fully involved its not up to you to reveal her finances and you need to tell your siblings this. Mom does not want them to know. As POA you don't have to reveal the info either.

A POA is a tool. It gives the person assigned the ability to handle an incompetent persons finances and medical wishes if you have a Medical POA. The only thing your siblings could do was go to a lawyer and ask for an accounting if you personally were handling Moms finances. They can't ask for an accounting from Mom if she is competent.

Are your siblings afraid she will spend "their" inheritance? Mom owes them nothing. She can spend everything if she wants. Its her money not theirs. She has no obligation to leave them anything. Its her money, she worked for it.

The only thing I suggest is if you run errands that you pay for and then she reimburses you by check, keep the receipts with the check no. on them. You don't want to be accused of Mom "giving you money".

It would be a good thing to have the lawyer who drew up the POA explain to you how it works and your responsibilities once Mom becomes incompetent.
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worriedinCali Jan 2019
POA’s aren’t only in affect when someone is incompetent. It all depends how the POA is a written. Some go into affect the moment they are signed. Some are “springing” and go into affect when the person is declared incompetent. There seems to be common misconcepncion on this forum. Most seem to assume that everyone has a springing POA-the type that goes into affect when incompetency is declared.
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It might be easier to appease your siblings if they have a specific question that is easily answered, if they just want to poke their noses into mom's affairs because they are pre-planning their inheritance I would have your mom to tell them to pizz off. As POA your responsibility is to carry out your mother's wishes, the only way a court will get involved is if they push it to that level. To protect yourself make sure you keep scrupulous record if they do.
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Maggabelle Jan 2019
They have not asked any specific questions. They had a lawyer send a letter demanding all the personal financials without asking me or our mom for them and without asking any questions about them. My mom has not complained to them about anything and seems very content with everything.

I read my state's statute about it, and it looks like for them to actually receive anything from a court, they would have to prove that our mom is incompetent, so it doesn't look like it would go anywhere.
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They've actually had a lawyer send a letter demanding an accounting? They sound toxic, it may be time for you and mom to respond with a cease and desist letter from your own lawyer, at the same time the lawyer can draft a letter of competency showing your mom is still able to look after her own interests.

https://www.agingcare.com/articles/why-a-letter-of-competency-should-be-part-of-every-seniors-legal-file-441176.htm
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Reply to the lawyer and copy them all. Ask them to share all their personal, financial details with your mom. Ask for a list of assets, bills due and any life insurance or savings they have. Ask them for their credit rating. Ask what their income is and how they have spent their money.

Tell them when they have all sent those details to your mom, you will ask her if she would like to do the same for them.
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Willie, good idea? Maggabelle, how did you handle the letter? Before I read Willie's comment, I was going to say maybe you should get Moms PCP to write a letter saying she is competent to handle her own affairs.

I think Mom chose the right person to be her POA. Too many times on this forum you read how a child abused their POA.
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