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After over two years being the only caregiver and feeling trapped as others, I finally followed the advice of people here and after a fairly minor accident where my aunt was taking into the hospital. I asked for "rehab care" to make sure was safe to come home. That facility was paid for by Medicare (up to 100 days). When she was ready to discharge, instead of bringing her home I found a memory care place that could take her in. Going directly from rehab to the assisted living made the transition "doable". The memory care facility costs $5800/mo. It has in-house medical which costs after Medicare about $50/mo. Hair cuts $25 (on request), Adult depends about $40/mo (anybody know how to find then cheap???). Her social security and pension covers less then half. But she has a house which I intend to sell. I can now visit her as often as I can. And not worry that I am dropping the ball trying to cover every act she can do. I would prefer picking up a second job then pulling the toilet to unclog it or cleaning up feces from under everything. I know costs are different everywhere, but wanted to give some people actual numbers.



Oh and for the record, I want to punch anyone in my family that in the last two years keep saying "Oh you are such a good person...." and they do nothing...

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Good update
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Great news and congratulations for taking control of an unmanageable situation!!! Your aunt is safe & secure now, and you're freed up a bit to live your own life w/o cleaning up feces all day & night! Win-win situation. I too hate it when I hear others carrying on about 'Oh what an angel you are' and all that nonsense when we all know talk is CHEAP.

Best of luck!
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Good news all around. I applaud your decision.
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Good for you, Bravo!!!
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A splendid update! Onward and upward!
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Way to go!!!
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Good for you!!!! I am so happy for you. Well done.
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I bought Depends from Costco. You can order and have them delivered there.
Also look into an evaluation by hospice. MY DH aunt, 95, with dementia, qualified. She has been on it for several years now and it has helped with the costs.
Good job on getting this done.
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hug!!

“Oh and for the record, I want to punch anyone in my family that in the last two years keep saying "Oh you are such a good person...." and they do nothing...”

me too!
i’m quite non-violent, except…

(oh boy, and my real name means peace, so i’m destined to refrain from punching…BUT…)


dear moregreyhair,

i wish for you to be happy, live your life, thrive. no stress. no grey hair.

i look forward to your screen name changing to:
“beautiful hair and thriving”

bundle of joy :)
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