First, the good news: Chuck is doing very well with his liver transplant. April 29 will mark the one year anniversary of his transplant at the Mayo Clinic. He's showing no signs of rejection, is off 80% of his medications, and his follow up tests and visits show him to be a super star. He's back to photographing birds every morning with my son, even in minus 5 degree weather, so that pretty much says it all. My avatar pics are of his birds.
Now for the bad news: I've mentioned before having a surface melanoma on my arm removed in October of 2021. An "in situ" mole of no consequence where all the melanoma 'was removed successfully'. This was a result of having a dozen beauty marks on both arms blow up like balloons after the 2nd Covid shot, grow scabs on them, and when the scab fell off, the beauty mark disappeared entirely. Except for the one. And all of it was not successfully removed after all, as a few cells must've escaped into my body and caused metastatic stage 4 cancer in my lymph nodes, liver, and bones. I went to the ER 3 weeks ago for excruciating pain in my left side where a CT scan with contrast was ordered. The cancer was discovered at that time, and I've spent the last 2 weeks in testing. The cancer is not in my brain, thank God.
The Oncologist told me there is immunotherapy available now for malignant melanoma. 2 types at once, administered via IV (no port) every 3 weeks x4. That's the goal. To turn on my immune system to kill off this cancer. 50% of immunotherapy patients are alive 2 years later. Idk what the percentage is at the 5 year mark. I've avoided doing research bc I'm overwhelmed enough already.
I'm having tremendous pain in my spine, ribs and liver, where the cancer is the worst. The Oncologist gave me some heavy duty pain meds and told me to wait it out until the IV starts kicking in to relieve my pain. He said I would live less than 2 months without treatment so my first treatment is tomorrow morning. The side effects can be gnarly and these infusions WILL kick my butt, he said. I'm ready, I think. Ain't no beauty mark gonna take ME down at 65! 😑
I'm useless at home, so Chuck is doing everything. Laundry, cooking, grocery shopping, driving to appointments. I have a housekeeper coming in to do the heavy cleaning and my stepson and his wife are cooking 7 dinners for us and bringing them by on Saturday. I have to make sure HE'S not overworked during this treatment process to where he gets sick. He's already overcome with worry and shock over all this as it is. I'll ask my stepson to repeat that meal making plan, too...they want to help & we need help.
We've had a lot to deal with the past year, and now my issues, which were there all along, just not apparent until recently. We wouldn't have been able to handle TWO of us sick at once anyway, so this is how it had to play out, I suppose.
The one bright spot I hold onto here is the dime I found on the floor of the ER room I'd been in ALL DAY where there was no dime on the floor. And when the gal was wheeling me back into the room from the CT scan, there it was. I kicked it across the floor to Chuck and he said, "what's that?" I said, "it's a dime from dad, telling me everything will be alright." He was speechless. Dad used to send me dimes all the time after he died in 2015, but stopped the past few years. I have a whole piggy bank full of them.
We can use all the prayers we can get right now, friends. I believe in prayers, in miracles and in signs from our deceased loved ones that they are with us in tough times. If you do too, please send up some prayers for Chuck and I right now.
Many thanks.
That little question has talked me off MANY ledges over the years.”
Brilliant. I had forgotten about this bit of wisdom that you have shared, previously.
I may just make a poster-sized version!
Hope you sleep well, tonight!
I've always thought of you as a super-star....someone with great intelligence, clarity, strength and positive energy - and wisdom. You've helped so many on this sight with your guidance and insight.
I am sending you my heartfelt prayers and positive energy for continued strength and great health and healing - I hope this will all be behind you soon for brighter days and the most positive outcome for a full recovery and the very best of health. We're all with you in spirit and praying hard!
Sending love and hugs ~
I believe that your positive attitude and faith are going to pull you through this difficult time.
It is shocking when we get news likes this. When my husband received the test results that showed his positive cancer results, he couldn’t even talk about it and asked me not to tell anyone.
I respected his wishes and kept quiet. Later on, after he was able to process the information, he spoke about it with others and said that he didn’t mind me sharing it.
I am glad that you are able to share your feelings. Maybe men deal with these situations differently. My husband overall is a private person so it didn’t really surprise me that he reacted the way that he did.
I wasn’t going to push him. I wanted him to do whatever was best for him at the time that he found out about his cancer.
Catching cancer early makes a world of difference. I have known people who were in stages three and four though and beat it.
I believe that if it isn’t our time to go, then we won’t.
That little question has talked me off MANY ledges over the years.
GG, everyone's always 'ready' for an azz kicking until it happens. Then we're crying like little girls, right? For today, all is well. Thank YOU for being a part of my newest journey. I wish it was a funner one to share, though.
I still have a clearer-than-usual head, for some reason, so YAY.
Golden, ty for the info about the heated mattress pad; I will check it out on Amazon b/c ALL types of heat or ice help my pain. My son bought me a heated vest which I wear every time I leave the house or when I'm going over to his house to see my grandson b/c it' gives me 4 hours more of the ability to sit and interact w/o needing to go into the bed. Most times.
I join in todays prayers for you!
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Thanking the Lord that He hears our prayers.
And He will answer.
“Heal me, O LORD, and let me be healed; Save me, and let me be saved”
- Jeremiah 17:14
I am so glad for the practical help you have coming and I will pray that even more support comes your way over the coming months.
Thank you for letting us be a part of your newest journey.
So sorry to hear your news. I will pray for you.
No side effects so far ( it's too soon) but I feel clearer headed and was able to sit at the dinner table for 10 minutes longer than usual tonight which felt good 😍
Praying that your treatment is doing its job, with minimal side effects.
RD: ty, I'm not surprised to hear your mother The Bionic Woman is still hanging on. Heres an analogy....When I was a kid, I'd save my $ to buy small pets at the pet shop down the street. Newts were .49. It was gruesome how those newts would slither ALMOST down the drain, but I'd find them hanging on by 2 claws onto the grate. I'd have to rustle up a tweezer to pluck those guys out of the tub.
Alva I'm sincerely touched that you would have posted a prayer and prayer flag for me at a church on your route. That means a lot 😚
NHWM, no weird taste in my mouth. I'm not having chemo but 2 different immunotherapies, Yervoy and Obdiva. They are monoclonal antibodies that REV up and turn ON the body's immune system to rid the cancer and heal the diseased parts. Once the immune system is turned on, however, it can't be turned off. So side effects can be tricky. We're going for 3 more treatments, that's the goal. Immunotherapy is considered a bit gentler form of chemo, basically, and no port is needed. IV is inserted in my arm to deliver meds.
Bandy, Claire, CTTN, snoopy, thanks much for the prayers and kind words. Xoxo
And Geaton, thank you for taking the time to post such a meaningful prayer du jour.
I've only been on this forum for a short time but you have given me such good advise and really helped me deal with all I'm going through right now. Thank you very much for that. I only wish I could do/say something to help you in this time. I believe very much in the power of prayer and I will pray for you and Chuck. I pray the pain gets better and the cancer disappears.
My MIL would complain about the metallic taste in food when she was getting chemo. She completely lost her taste for certain foods.
I posted a prayer and a prayer flag for you today at my church I pass on the way to the library; this month's flags full of soft greens and look like spring. My thoughts are with you.
I’ve been praying as The Lord brings you to mind.
Update us when you can.
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I will keep you both in my heart, with thoughts and energy for getting through each day, for guidance for your treatment team, and for healing. Know that you both are held in the light, as much as my heart can manage.
"Dear Lord, on behalf of LL, I ask for grace for her and Chuck to endure the challenge that is before them. You know she wants to live. You know she doesn’t want her body to change. You know she doesn’t want to be sick. You also know why she must meet this challenge, why she must go down this frightening path. She wants to avoid it. She wants the doctors to tell her the diagnosis was wrong. She wants her life back the way it was. She does not understand … But she knows if she puts her hand in Yours, You will guide her. You will give her courage. You will comfort her. I ask for Your grace for her and Chuck and their family now and forever. Amen"
Notre Dame Book of Prayer
And when you love someone that much, it’s just as painful to think of leaving them as it is to think of them leaving you.
There are so few words that can even touch this, but sending many, many hugs.
I had to read your post twice. At first, I thought I read it wrong. Then, it seemed like a sick joke by someone who hijacked your account.
I wish we could make it not so.
I echo cxmoody, we are holding you up - in love and prayer. Both you and Chuck.
You are very brave, but just know no one here expects that. Your real pain and fear are ok, too, if and when you need to share. We have strong shoulders and care very much.
May the peace of God be with you, dear one. May He hold you in His strength and shelter you and Chuck with His mighty wings.