Well I finally broke down and asked for some help. A very nice social worker from the dept of aging came in and did an evaluation on Mom today.
She was really helpful. After Mom has a TB test she will be being picked up here at the house and taken to a elder recreation center during the day a couple times a week. Plenty of activities,a nice lunch and picked up and dropped off.
Also set up for Mom to have someone come in and help her with bathing (I hate bath time) twice a week.
She was able to sift through the B.S. that Mom was saying (Im mean to her) and see exactly what was needed for both of us. I encourage anyone who has this available to give it a try.
Why did I wait so long.
Just a heads up. Make sure there isnt alot in savings acct since that was one of the questions that she asked I have to assume that it would be an issue had Mom had a ton of money loaf'in in her acct.