I need some SERIOUS advice. I have been caring for my sick dad for 5 years now. As of 3 weeks ago he started to get seriously ill, and has been hospitalized since.
Throughout the 5 years I have lived with, and given the most loving care a daughter could, but my two sisters have hated, and resented me for most of my life. I am disabled, and despite my infrequent requests for help , and asking them to jusy visit our father they have said "no" almost every time. They have been underhanded, and extremely cruel right under my dads radar. They have told him lies about me, and have blamed me for not coming to visit. I have reached out to them endless times by both calling myself, and having a counselor call them several times as well to resolve our problems. Each time the answer has been "NO". My dad still chose to believe them as one is married to a man my who my father feels is like the son he never had. He, and my other sisters boyfriend make the "gang" against me 4, and as we know there's power in numbers. I am the eldest daughter, and the only one who has agreed to live here, and care for him. I've given up my own personal life to be here, and have done all the chores, by myself on painful legs. I used much of my monthly allowance of money for household things, and my food stamps to pay for both our food, only to come up short at the end of each month. When there have been medical emergencies I've been the one to deal with them. Each time they've come running like the "doting daughters" criticizing my every move. I almost lost my mind over the whole thing after years of it until I had a breakthrough last summer. I came to understand that no one can upsey you unless you ALLOW them to. From then on things were okay, and I no longer was bothered.
The problem now, is that he is finally at the end, something I have mixed feelings about. I love my dad so much, but I can no longer watch his pain and sickness. About 2 months ago I found a small job that I do on donation only. I heal horses that have been abused through natural techniques. I have always considered it a calling, and not a job. It gives me about $20 a week which I need desperately. The problem was that dad had gotten so much worse I needed my sisters to just come a few times a week to heat up meals, and stay with him a little while afterwards to make sure he didn't pass out. He outright refused visiting nurses, and being that he had no dementia was the only one who could have requested their services. I called first my middle sister (50 yrs old) and asked her to come and heat his dinner. As usual she had a "Dr.'s appt.", her usual excuse but did say she had planned on stopping by for 10 mins to see him, but couldn't stay because of her "appt". I then called the other sister (42 yrs old) and asked her. Her answer was "I have had a high fever for 3 days, and don't want dad to catch it", also her usual excuse. They should both be dying for all their "maladies", but I have known they'd been lying all along, and had decided long ago to do the best I could on my own. For some reason on the day my sister came by for her "10 mins" I did something I have never done. I went outside, and called her Dr.'s office to confirm her appt. I was told by the secretary that "Friday is always his day off, and he does not see patients on that day." I was also told he was on vacation, and wouldn't be in the office till the following week. I came back in, and she was sitting by his bed. She apparently saw just how sick he really was, and told me she would "cancel her appt."! I then looked on Facebook to see what my other sister had been "up to" during her "fever" days. Yes, she was partying it up all over the place. My HUGE mistake was to call them on it...busted! They were FURIOUS...just absolutely out of their minds furious! The following morning my dad was hospitalized. The morning after that I was awakened at 6:30 with the two of them, and my 85 yr old aunt screaming at me to leave the house, and accusing me of being a "drug addict"!!!!!!!!!! I have NEVER EVER abused any kind of substance in my entire life!!! I had to call the police to get rid of them. They were violent! I could not understand where that allegation came from. Then . . . I knew. The week before, they were here on a Sunday. My sister (Dr. appt one) was talking about her pain, and how nothing she was prescribed worked. I told her that after years of my Dr. trying things we finally found a great thing. I was prescribed a very low dose methedone with an 800 ibuprofin together once in the am., and once in the pm. It has worked perfectly with no side effects at all. My elderly aunt said "methedone is for "drug addicts"". I said yes, but it's also prescribed for chronic pain. Well, they RAN with it to try to kill me. They have convinced everyone, and put doubts in dads head. They've accused me of other things as well. My dad now only wants to fight in the hospital. I feel like I've been crucified. HELP