I usually don't get surprised or shocked when things happen. Yesterday was the exception. I have never understood why my sister(s) say things to me as I am caring for my husband. Neither sister has any close physical contact with us. One lives in another state and the other in a different city.
Yesterday I discovered that for the 37 years I've been married they thought I was bossy and mean to my husband. Not knowing I've been the object of their conversations for so long, I was totally shocked and began to hyperventilate.
Anyone who really knows us would be just as shocked as I was to hear this accusation. Now, I understand the family conflict caregivers have. Before I went to bed last night I realized that their perception was very warped.
I always seek to be open to suggestions. I realize we all need help. However, critical spirits need to hit the dust. Thanks so very much to all of you who encourage and contribute to our forum. It was a lesson for me as I have a daughter-in-law who has a tone when she talks and I often get my feelings hurt. I realized if my 2 sisters (who are happily divorced) can be so off base then I need to give my daughter-in-law a break too. I was judging and shouldn't have been.
Every couple has their own way to communicate. I am so thankful for the love I have received from my husband and the happy years we've had so far. Take care everyone and again THANKS.
To add humor to this I have to tell you something funny. My husband had been divorced for 12+ years before I met him. When grandchildren came around I became friends with his previous wife. We are good friends and she has taught me how to arrange flowers through the years. She is staying in our home as she has no electricity and she was here when my sister went off yesterday.
She said to me "Don't worry. I know if you were mean, he (my husband) would never stand for it." He no longer recognizes his first wife and knows she is our friend. It has been 11 years since his diagnosis and we've had challenges but no problems like so many have. I have been blessed beyond measure.