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I don't think I have posted before but I read everyday and the help for my peace of mind has been awesome.


My mom lives with us. She is 92 and has dementia, cancer and heart failure. After 3 1/2 years she is moving to an Adult Family Home. It suddenly became necessary for our health. My husband has been awesome in helping but he had back surgery and can not lift anything. Mom is getting more unsteady and feeble. Plus the arguments over pills and such.


So after much soul searching we decided on the move.


The place is nice and fairly close. We can visit a couple times a week or more. However we will be able to get our life back. Didn't want to do this but I realized I was more unhappy than I needed to be.


Yes the guilt is there but the relief that she will be well taken care of is a welcomed change. Or place just isn't safe for her anymore without major reconstruction.


So on to straightening out her paperwork and talking with the Elder Lawyer. Mom will be happier without me around all the time and others besides us to talk to.


Thank you so much everyone.

That's great news about the plans for your mother. I hope there is a smooth transition and that you'll get a chance to get some much needed rest and recovery for yourself.
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Thank you all for your kind words. Finally found my post. Not sure why it posted as anonymous as I was loggin.

My guilt is finally gone however I do miss my mom we all do. I have been able to visit her just 2 times. We had a horrible snow storm that has gone on for over 9 days. Yes I live just outside Seattle. Stupid snow. Just glad mom is in her new place now instead of here. There is no way if she got hurt EMTs could get here.

Once again a giant thank you for just being here and I was able to keep my sanity.
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May she settle in happily and all your guilt prove to be groundless :) Best wishes to your husband for a quick recovery.
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So glad for you. So very glad.

NO GUILT is necessary. Your mother is looked after. You and your husband get your lives back. Win win for everyone.

Time to take care of your health. And enjoy your time free of caregiving.
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Your Welcome. Glad the transition is going smoothly. The one fear I had with Mom living here that we would miss the window where we had time to do things together. It was a 24/7 job. I was able to place her in a nice AL and eventually a nice NH. Having a split level didn't help with a person who couldn't do stairs.
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