My Dad who is in memory care with my mom was on palliative care for a non operative intestinal blockage. He came back to the memory care Monday after spending a couple of days in the hospital to attempt to get the blockage to clear without surgery.
He had been with no food or water for about 9 days. My mom slept next to him in their room in memory care during this time. At about 3:30 she woke and asked the hospice nurse if he was ok.. she held his hand and a few minutes later took a few breaths.. then no breaths and he passed. It was the best possible scenario.. just the two of them and the hospice nurse.
I have another thread about the siblings and all the hell they put me through during the last week.. giving me a hard time for putting them on hospice..banding together and shutting me out.. and basically in some ways blaming me for his death.. blaming me for taking them back to the memory care for palliative care.
My mom was able to stay with my Dad the entire time.. of course it was so hard.. just didn't understand why he couldn't have water, kept forgetting what was going on or that he was even sick, wanted to bring him food.
This morning after he passed was so difficult to watch.. It was heartbreaking. Even worse.. she kept forgetting that he had passed.. all day she kept asking where her husband was..when I told her he passed .. she went through it all over again as if hearing it for the first time.
We rearranged her room..it was so sad to see her room without his bed. I hope she finds some way of going on without him.
I am happy for my Dad to be free of dementia and a failing body...now he is free and healthy...Fly away my sweet father... I love you and will miss you so much.