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Today, he had trouble breathing and vomited his breakfast.


When I arrived it was 80. Got it to 90. After oxygen.


He walks in his room without any assistance. He’s getting weaker and weaker. He takes 2 kinds of water pills because of leaky legs, so he’s always getting up to urinate. He doesn’t want incontinence briefs. I’m scared today. Today is different.

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Call the hospice Rn.
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I agree call the hospice nurse. Can you get him a urinal so he's not walking so much? It's making his heart work harder. My father had CHF @ 96 & was at home with hospice care. He passed away on his 97th birthday 6yrs ago. Take care
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By it's very name, Congestive Heart Failure, the disease is described. It is a failing heart, a failing pump. If he heart failure is right heart failure the fluid collects in the abdomen and in the legs and periphery, and if left heart failure, in the lungs (the most severe, and sometimes "Flash Pulmonary Edema can take a person very quickly indeed. There is only the medications to help eliminate the fluid. And it is a disease that will not get better, but only worse. It is exhausting for the patient. You are recognizing the signs that you are in the end stage and got Hospice. That will make things as easy as it can be as things progress. The water pills not only cause frequency and urgency, but with the water washed out goes the basic electrolytes we need for life, our potassium especially. I am so sorry. This is one of the most common diseases of aging. I know it is hard to see. You are all doing the best you can.
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This is exactly what my sweet dad dealt with for so very long and what took his life. CHF is a slow, insidious disease. My dad used a portable urinal kept next to his bed for the frequent needs but did have to use adult undergarments for overnights, this is simply something to make peace with and not be insulted about. Don’t worry about food, it becomes increasingly unimportant. Our hospice nurses all told us to keep dad hydrated, even if it was minimally so, as dehydration is a painful way to go. One huge helpful suggestion by one nurse was to make ice chips from his favorite drink and spoon those into his mouth, it gave him both flavor and hydration and he loved it to the end. The hospice people can give you wise advice on keeping dad comfortable, lean on them and their experience. Know that your dad will leave this life exactly when he’s supposed to, and all the fussing over him and striving to make it better won’t do a thing. The most important thing is simply holding his hand and letting him know your love and care. I’m sorry you’re both going through this and wish you both peace
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I'm so sorry, Lizzy. Sounds like he's winding down. Often, pain meds help with breathing in that they just calm the patient down so they don't struggle so much.

Don't try to force him to eat. That can hurt more than it can help sometimes. Hang in there.
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I am so sorry. My dads end days were very similar. The hospital couldn't give him enough water pills to keep the water out of his tissue, his heart couldn't pump hard enough to move it.

May The Lord give you strength, wisdom and courage for this journey, may HE give your dad peace and comfort in his transition.
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Lizzy, checking in. How are things with Dad now?
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Dad is declining fast. He can no longer walk to the bathroom. I have a commode by the bed that he uses willingly. He also doesn't mind wearing the pull ups, as we call them. As sundowner approaches he can’t stop thinking and talking about his medicine and if he has an appointment. He was such a planner in life. Always wants to know the next step. He always was an anxious person and now it’s on overdrive, and to the point that it’s affecting his breathing. Hospice nurse recommended Ativan at night.
It wears off after 6 hrs, He’s moaning and groaning.
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I'm sorry you are going through this without feeling adequately supported. I've read that some hospice agencies provide a higher level of in person care as people transition to actively dying, have you asked about that? Don't be afraid to use the medicine provided, as much and as often as needed to keep him comfortable.
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The hospice nurse who was with my dad for about the last eight hours of his life gave him a small dose of medication every half hour rather than one full dose every 4-6 hours in order to keep the level in his system consistent.

Is it possible for someone to take a night shift and do that for his Ativan? It might not need to be every half hour, but maybe a half dose every three hours?
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My Dad passed peacefully with my sister and I by his bedside.
Hospice Was 24/7 the last five days. They were so caring and supportive. The Funeral was in Philadelphia, where Dad and Mom were born and raised, and now he’s with our Mom. So many Family and Friends….I’m home now in Florida, gathering his belongings and moving his furniture to our Home. His AL have been wonderful and caring. Until I give the keys back to AL, I have XM Seriously Sinatra playing on his Alexia 24/7. He loved Sinatra.
12/21/1926-11/17/2022❤️
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Lizzy, I’m so sorry for the loss of your beloved father. It really resonates with me as we both lost our dads to the same insidious condition of CHF. I’m glad you had a great support system from both hospice and family. I wish you peace and comfort in the days ahead
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Lizzy, I am so sorry for your loss. May The Lord give you and your family comfort, peace and strength.

I am happy to hear that you and your sister were surrounded by friends and family during this difficult time. It does help soften the loss to see how much love they and you have.
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Lizzy,
I’m sorry for your loss.

It’s good to hear that Hospice was an asset to your family!
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Lizzy
Very sorry for the loss of your dad. Wishing you peace.
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So sorry for your loss
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