I met someone online. Supposedly he lived in a town an hour from here, but he was going to Nigeria for a job. After a short time there, he started asking for money. I’ve given him $40,000 so far.
He says he loves me. I feel stupid just seeing these words.
Now he wants more money before he can get home.
I’m thinking that would be a stupid idea. I would be stuck with bills I can’t pay and no future
The best thing is to cease contact immediately. This person (or group of people) is a con artist. Contact the FBI about it. Hopefully this creep left enough information in texts and emails to be easy to find and arrest.
Safest to meet people to date who are friends of friends.
I wonder if he is an old ex husband of mine. There's a few. No. Wait. My ex husbands, of ALL people are NOT smitten with me.
The lovely thing about being on Facebook is that you can be ANYBODY. And I basically AM. Go figure, from Ancient retired RN I have morphed into graphic designer who studied at the Pratt in New York City and am only in my 30s. If I friend you, pictures will prove I am NOT in my 30s, or have aged very badly indeed.
This is the thing about Social Media. Trust no one. I mean, right now, sitting here, typing away, what is to say I am NOT the retired ancient RN I claim to be, but rather a 16 year old Nigerian lad hard at work on they keyboard? Or Paul from British Baking Show. With a Nursing 101 handbook circa 1970s.
As to sending money to anyone you don't know personally? Ummmmm. I advise against it. The odds of seeing a penny of it back are poor.
I certainly can understand, esp in Covid times, the desperate lonliness that can make an person prey for these schemes and scams. It is said our elders are preyed upon so easily because they TALK to them on the phone. Simply TALK to them, where so few others care to.
It's pretty sad. I have come EVEN to question the actual posts of some OPs on Forum. And THAT is definitely sad.
I find that the men who try to connect with me use attractive photos and are very charming. I refuse to engage with them, but as I said I get several of these contacts each week.
Although my profile security is tight, they seem to think because I am single, I am looking for a man.
Or he's lonely, wants companionship, falls in love immediately, and needs money. They prey on vulnerable and lonely women; finding someone receptive encourages them.
Everything is fake, designed to elicit pity and concern. Once the target gives money, it doesn't stop, and it escalates, sometimes into physical threats.
I don't recall if the FTC or FBI has jurisdiction, but I do recall that one federal agency had become involved. Do some online research on "romantic scams", "honey traps" and Nigerian scams. They're all versions of someone who creates a fake identity for the purpose of financially scamming someone.
This hit has a good selection of articles you can read:
Or just search on "romantic scams".
Back out of this while protecting yourself. Don't let on that you know he's a criminal and scammer. You do need to recognize that these people can be dangerous.
You could probably end it quickly by telling him that you've suffered a great financial loss, have severe health problems, and need him to repay the money, ASAP. I would guess you wouldn't hear from him again. (Make sure not to delete his messages though.)
I would read any FTC or FBI articles and be guided by what they suggest on who, and at what level, to report this scammer. Some of them actually are caught! One was caught by he made the mistake of targeting a federal level employee; I don't recall if the man worked for the FBI but I think he did. He set up his own honey trap, with the conversation being recorded, the scammer caught, arrested, and taken out of the romance scam arena. I think his next residence was a prison.
otherwise.....cut this jerk out of your life. He’s probably been IN Nigeria this whole time scamming many women! You are being scammed and your money is gone forever. He doesn’t love you. He loves your money!
Where were you sending money to, Nigeria? 😣
Please DO NOT send this person one more dime of your hard earned money! You've already lost a fortune of your retirement, so don't waste any more!
I don't know if such things are reportable to the police or not. I doubt you have any way to recoup your losses, either. I'm sorry you have been hurt like this, too.
Please don't answer anymore direct messages from men on social media. And definitely don't send anyone any more money!!!!