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We are still moving books and another thousand or so went out to the Quakers again yesterday. Their school libraries are getting fat and happy and they are so cool with distributing the books to other schools as well. Sanity through education. We had mulitple copies of the same editions of much of Shakespeare so they can actually use them to play act in class because all the actors can have their own script. Books are all we do here for the time being and I have the utmost respect for those still deep in the trenches of active caregiving. Dealing from deep within the trench of active PTSD is bad enough and I hope that those of us who have gone on before so to speak will help those who are following to hopefully avoid this part of the process.
I emailed Pirate and she replied and I don't think that she will be posting much anymore. She is trying to move on in her life and I totally respect that decision also. She asked me to say hello to all of you for her and she is coping with a crazy work environment and just doesn't want to think about caregiving and the associated problems and challenges. I know that all of you can appreciate that and despite the fact that in order to get to that point we have to suffer a huge loss I am sure that there are most who will welcome the end of it all and want to move on like Pirate. Good for her and I am serious.
Ted would often wonder why I was still here because my caregiving job was over. I told him that I was still here and Miz is still here because of the support we recieved and still recieve and that we know there just isn't that much support out there for active caregivers and boy did I wish there had been something like this when I started out taking care of mom. There is room for another 1000 threads like this one and another 100 websites and that would still only scratch the surface.
Maybe one day I will go and Miz may go but we are here for awhile longer while our friends cope with the unimaginable. Unimaginable to the DBs of the world anyhoo.
Don't know what go me on such a serious spin so to balance it out here are some Quotes On Cats:
"Do not meddle in the affairs of cats, for they are subtle and will pee on your computer." - Bruce Graham
"There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast." - Unknown
"Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods. Cats have never forgotten this." - Anonymous
"Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow." - Jeff Valdez
"In a cat's eye, all things belong to cats." - English proverb
"As every cat owner knows, nobody owns a cat." - Ellen Perry Berkeley
"One cat just leads to another." - Ernest Hemingway
"Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you later." - Mary Bly
"Cats are rather delicate creatures and they are subject to a good many ailments, but I never heard of one who suffered from insomnia." - Joseph Wood Krutch
"People that hate cats will come back as mice in their next life." - Faith Resnick
"There are many intelligent species in the universe. They are all owned by cats." - Anonymous
"I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior." - Hippolyte Taine
"No heaven will not ever Heaven be; Unless my cats are there to welcome me." - Unknown
"There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats." - Albert Schweitzer
"The cat has too much spirit to have no heart." - Ernest Menaul
"Dogs believe they are human. Cats believe they are God." - Unknown
"Time spent with cats is never wasted." - Colette
"Some people say that cats are sneaky, evil, and cruel. True, and they have many other fine qualities as well." - Missy Dizick
"You will always be lucky if you know how to make friends with strange cats." - Colonial American proverb
"Cats seem to go on the principle that it never does any harm to ask for what you want." - Joseph Wood Krutch
"I got rid of my husband. The cat was allergic." - Unknown
"My husband said it was him or the cat ... I miss him sometimes." - Unknown
"Cats aren't clean, they're just covered with cat spit." - Unknown
Happy Saturday all and Linda, please kiss Pa for his 88th birthday yesterday. I mean kiss him today because I don't think your lips can reach into yesterday...
Hey guys found out tonight that one of the victoms of yesterdays shooting was a cousin of my nieces husband. That was a bad day for the city of Grand Rapids. At least the guy saved tax payers money by taking himself out but the devastation he has done has hurt a lot of people. I guess when the mind snaps you do some crazy shit but, life goes on and you just have to deal with the present and be thankful for what ya got cause it could be a heck of a lot worse. Well enough of that.
Makes sense, #1 A friend's husband works as a service technition for a large extermanating company. One of the rules of the company is to confirm each appointment bt phoning the household the night before his service call. " Hi, this is Gary from A to Z Pest Control Company. Your wife phoned us, he said one evening when a man answered. There was a lon silence, and then my friend's husband heard the man on the other end say, "Honey, its for you. Someone wants to talk to you about your relatives.
Makes sense, #2
A teacher wa giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clear, he says, "Students, if i stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it and I'd turn red in the face. So why, when I'm stan- ing upright in the ordinary position, the blood doesn't run into my feet?" Muttered a bored student, audibly: "It's because your feet aren't empty."
Makes sense, #3
It take brains to run a bank. That is why bankers leave both doors to the vault open and then chain the pens to the counters.
Oh my lord.....We've all entered into the twilight zone......I love this thread!!! Rossella, I understand you wanting to give your DB friend the benefit of the doubt...sort of...all the while knowing that he is full of s*%t. When I told my dumber than dirt girl friend about mom falling Saturday nite she texted me.."well you know my feelings on that, right?" She had already voiced her opinion that if I keep mom here she will one day fall and kill herself. So I asked her which would be better, her falling in a NH where nobody cares about her and dying or falling at home where she is loved and cared for? Either way she would be dead, but at least she would die in a loving home and her last days would have been happy. She totally didn't get it because, she says, it will tie me down and I should think of myself too. So I knew exactly what she meant by that remark about her "feelings on this". I just texted back, "if your feelings have the words Nursing Home in them....forget it! but thanks for the encouragement". You think our DB expert would consider that exchange communicating? No..they just don't get it and obviously neither did our expert. Let's just shoot em all up with Novacain. What do you say, Christina? A syringe full of novacain straight in the brain. Nah...they'd never know the difference. Brain dead already.
Mom's BP has been up the last couple of days. I think she's worried about our trip to VA. I was talking about it today and I noticed the worried look on her face. I finally got her to tell me that she doesn't remember some of those people. (her grandchildren) so I said, hey do what I do...just smile and act like you know what's going on. They'll never know the difference. We had a good laugh about it and 30mis later I took her BP again and it had dropped 30 points. Isn't that something?
Hey to everyone...not even going to try to name you all. I feel so blessed that I have so many new friends that I can't keep up with all their names. Now that IS something!!
Gotta go get mom ready for bed now. C Ya...wouldn't want to B ya.....oh that's right I AM already.
Hey Crew, Ahhhh... we now have a new one: Douchebag. DB, Jr. good one Rossella and Christina. So, if you try to talk to someone and they don't understand what you are talking about and try to blow sunshine up your skirt, they're a DB.
Yes, let's start over. I cannot talk right now, thank goodness my index finger is not full of lidocaine. The pain is starting to creep back into the base of my lower teeth. I am going into the market to get mashed potatoes, decided against a milkshake because if the cold and sugar. I cried today to my dentist that I cannot take any more stress, be it physical, emotional or mental. But he acted like old douchebag. Maybe they are multiplying, Rosella? Take care and aren't we blessed that all if US understand what you are going through, and there is much comfort in that. DB, Jr. will have a rude awakening one day, as the Universe does not play favorites. Really. We knew that, right? Love you all, Christina xo
Christina, I re-read your post. You are talking about 2 different hearing centres. One near Miz, one near you. Now I understand. And I don't have the excuse that the dentist has given me a painkiller!!!!! This conversation is becoming surrealistic!
Christina, yes, now I understand. What does Miz have to do with it? Do you live nearby???? (BTW, tequila after the dentist is a good idea!) So you agree with Daniela! He is a douchebag (or worse)! Well he is much younger than me and he just got married and he went to Galapagos on honeymoon, his parents are both alive and well, he is rich... Of course he thinks that everybody has to be happy! Bobbie, can you have a clean shot by telephone? Do cellphonesnipers exist?
Rosella, no not hubby, I thought Miz was going to work for hearing place. Did I read something wrong? I am not focusing lately. Feel scattered and want to do a summer read, need to relax. Maybe I need a clear shot of tequila.
Rosella: I am sitting (reclining!!) in dentist chair, but have to say your manboy friend poor thing is close to douchebag bur other hole. I am SO BAD. I know, please forgive me everyone as I have had so many injections of drugs I know not what I say. Kind of not. That guy, Rosella, and most others NOT HERE, NOT US, reason for my cynicism and snickering. Sardonic humor. Gotta go. Dentist back.
Hi gals, (Ted is not writing anymore!). I am sorry if you got worried for me. Nothing happened in fact; I just had a little bit of psychological distress. Talking about the thread of the scandal (that has been cancelled?) (the one about the fact that our siblings don't help us and the Expert says that we have to communicate with them). I had a text-conversation with a friend of mine yesterday afternoon. (Did the Expert advice us to use text messages to communicate? Or just e-mails?) Anyway he asked me how I was, and I said "I am going to the swimming pool and it's good for my health, but I am very stressed about my mother". And he started to say: (always texting) "you have to accept it, the decline is natural in old age" and I answered: "Easier said than done; you have to live with a person with Alzheimer to understand how painful it is to take care of a person that doesn't know who you are and feels abandoned by her daughter" And he said "The stress, what a word, you mustn't be overwhelmed by stress, you have to fight it, you have to live with your mother with "joy, lightness and serenity" (HIS WORDS). At this point I already wanted to tell him OBMAJ, but as the Expert told us we have to communicate, I tried to explain to him a little bit better that there can be little joy, lightness and serenity in a life like this. I gave him some details. Then, I wanted to cut short and I told him "Dont't worry for me, I am going to survive". You won't believe me, he INSISTED and he texted "You mustn't survive, you have to LIVE! Because life is beautiful and you have to be strong against your problems". At this point I understood that he had no clue of what he was talking about, I texted him "Thanks and goodbye". And yesterday night I meditated and meditated (that's why I didn't write). And I understood that even if you explain yourself, you say what is happening, how you feel etcetera, the people that don't live a life like ours REALLY DON'T GET IT! And this friend of mine is a nice boy and I know that he is fond of me. Daniela, my help, said "He is a douchebag" and I guess that she has her point. Anyway, yesterday afternoon I had the proof that communication is impossible - with the rest of the world. I must say that I spent more than half an hour of my precious free time to text him back, because I had been encouraged by the Expert, but it was useless. That's all. I was just toughtful yesterday night. Linda happy birthday to dad. Christina, good idea (did I understand well? Would you like your husband to work for that structure which takes care of hearing problems?) Bobbie, yes a clean shot is the only way to solve some situations because when people get so crazy you have just to avoid they kill other people. What else? I'll re-read your posts later and will tell you more. I wanted just to reassure you. I am well. And todayt I swam for 1/4 of a mile, which is not bad considering that it was my 2nd time in the swimming pool after 3 years!!!!
kuli ! i knew i was forgettin someone ! . annie - its a good idea o have a wake at home instead of payin 20 thousand dollars at the funeral home . its outrages ! i wonder if we could do that here at home ?? anybody ever know about this , i know back in the cowboys days we did that but mmm this is 2011 , save people tons of money !
mornin crew ! rise and shine ! time to shine bobbie s boat ! :-) rossella - im worried about u too . plz get some rest and fill us in later . christina- good to hear from you ! isnt iphone wonderful . keep in touch where ever u go :-) miz- whats up girl ? did u find out anything about the job ? i wonder if u could go back to ur old job and they d hire u back ? i pray for u to get the job that fits u well and makes u happy and look forward to get up and go to work . cuz- i am so sorry about that shooting . damn people just dont have any morals ! so heart aching ! today is pa s bday 88 yrs old ! ssk !! whats up girl ?? havent heard from u in a long while . new people movin in and keeping u on ur toes ? keep in touch . xoxo yes bobbie it is wonderful to see rip here and there . im hollaring for harper to give her a hug and a lick on the face :-) . woof woof . annie - annt - careshare- ss- pirate- jsomebody- oh plz lord dont let me forget whoe les ,w aaaaaaaaaaaa my mind just went blank . it does that when im trying to think who eles , blank blink blooop . dead mind ! deef ! dflex!! ah its a comin back now . austin !!! woo ! soon u ll have a road trip !! u becareful out there ok . gotta go walk the dogs , arf arf xoxoxo
Morning! I will have to focus to go back and read yesterday because I am worried about Rosella, too. She is such a great communicator and her posts are thoughtful, deep, balanced- always make me sit up straight. Blessings and hope things are "manageable". Isn't that a nice word? Haha Miz! We found a great guy who owns a hearing aid center, as Mother's old pair got shattered at the last place she was in, plus, My hubby needs Help badly. Hr is thinking he has neurological problem, as his eye and ear on left side both have major damage from 2 separate accidents. I was thinking the other day how nurturing you are, and if you did not want to work in NH or daycare for kids, what would be an ideal place for you-- this sounds great. I asked Sam who is the hearing tech, if he is a doctor. He said he took enough school to do what he had to, plus has a MBA and is an electrical engineer, but could not finish last segment in med school because could not stand to see little children with deafness. Then he started to cry. What a sweet man:) I said, yes, we came to the right place. Bless is heart. We are going this afternoon to have first fitting after molds were made 2 wks ago. Well, good luck with that opportunity, Miz. Everyone, have a wonderful HOT day. Writing this on my iPhone and cannot check for mistakes, so will write more later when I can see what I'm doing! Am enjoying reading and 'feeling' the current crew, and it is a good one. Love you guys. Hugs, Christina xo
Annie! love the bricklayer's story. I like the tradition of having a wake. The wake last night for your friend's dad sounded wonderful. What nice people.
Cuz! I hope that there is no more collateral damage from this insane person and that SWAT gets a clear head shot. How awful. Please try to remember not to internalize the insanity of others. That's one of the things that we all fight on a daily basis. Including the urge to get a clean head shot. Just looked it up and the guy got his own clean head shot.....
Rossella! omg what has happened? we are all waiting to hear. Hope you are as ok as you can be considering the circumstances.
Kuli! you are an amazing daughter! I am glad that you and your dad are strong together and my neck hurt so bad last night I thought about having a muffin also....
Jen! VERY funny poop song. If there was ever a caregiver convention we should have a talent show and everyone get up and do 5 minutes of their best omg material....
DEEF!! stay healthy or we won't be able to hang out on the boat! I can't even imagine what you are going through with your mom and the fact that she gets everything everywhere and shreds everything everywhere. eeeeeeeek!
Rip! it was good to see a line from you here and there!
Miz! got to choose happy over sad! boy oh boy do I know that it's easier said than done! Love you lots and I hope that you can feel better soon and get the job of your dreams with the hearing aid people. I want to see you post and gripe about having to hear people say "What??" all day until you can cure them. ok. the guy is here to help us move more books.... more later, lovbob
No jokes tonight. We have been following a sad story on TV today. A guy has shot and killed 7 people in 2 different houses today and now is holding hostages in another house. 5 adults and 2 kids. 2 of the women were his girl friends. Let ya know tommorro if they get the guy alive before he gets anyone else. Lov Cuz
I read your posts, I am tired tonight, I'll write tomorrow. because I have a story to tell you. It's long, so I am going to write it tomorrow. In any case, it is true, people that don't live a life like ours can't understand a bit of what we are doing and what we feel!
BTW - the jokes on here are such a relief! Thanks to Cuz for all of your posts and to all of the others that contribute to the laughter and smiles as well. Special prayers for you guys that you can continue to share your humor!!!!!
JSomebody - Trust me, there's been more than a few times I thought a little for him, a little or maybe even a lot for me! Instead I stick to my wine. But a "muffin" now and then sure does sound good!
Hello all. Hope you enjoyed the Bricklayer's Accident Report. Cuz loved your Lawnmower Joke. The picture I got in my head was priceless! Annt - you know why it's so green here - cause it never stops bloody raining! It's been like Monsoon weather here for the past few days (on the plus side, I don't have to water my Flower Pots, my Lawn or the shrubs!). Supposed to clear up at weekend. God I hope so. I'm just so sick of this rain. Toilet Duties - It's amazing what you get used to. I don't even gag anymore no matter what! Deefer - your Mom takes the Biscuit or was that the Tomato Soup! Would be funny if not so frustrating for you. Hang in there and Breathe..... Got back from a wake this evening. A friend and Colleague's Dad passed away yesterday. He was 87 and my friend had looked after him at home for the last 10yrs as well as working full time. She had a barrage of home help staff coming in and with some help from a sister and brother she managed though the bulk of the responsiblity was on her. She is so sad yet so relieved that her Dad was able to be taken care of at home and to pass away in his own home surrounded by family and friends. Isn't it the way we would all want to go. Don't know about the USA but the tradition of waking the person in their own home has really come back into use here and is now almost the norm rather than going to a funeral home. Two other colleagues and I drove to our friends home for the wake. Her Dad was laid out there in the Family Room. Neighbours were in the Kitchen making pots and pots of tea for all the callers and there was loads of food - home made cakes, pies and cookies. Some of the Neighbours stayed on washing up duty so there would always be dishes available. I thought it was really nice and would love to do that when my Mom passes away but since there is estrangement in the family (one of my sisters and I don't talk and will not be talking ever again!) so how could I do this and bar her from my home for Mom's funeral. Wouldn't put it past her to stand outside my home telling her story to everyone coming in! On the useless siblings thread - this is related. This sister who told me back in 1998 when I came home from the USA and my Dad had already had a stroke and Mom was in the early stages of Dementia - 'there will be no help from here, so don't ask' and I never did! Will have to think long and hard about it.
Australian Bricklayer's Accident Report Dear Sir, I am writing in response to your request for additional information in Block 3 of the accident report form. I put 'poor planning' as the cause of my accident. You asked for a fuller explanation and I trust the following details will be sufficient.
I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was working alone on the roof of a new six-story building. When I completed my work, I found that I had some bricks left over which, when weighed later were found to be slightly in excess of 500 lbs. Rather than carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower them in a barrel by using a pulley, which was attached to the side of the building on the sixth floor.
Securing the rope at ground I went up to the roof, swung the barrel out and loaded the bricks into it. Then I went down and untied the rope, holding it tightly to ensure a slow descent of the bricks. You will note in Block 11 of the accident report form that I weigh 135 lbs.
Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel, which was now proceeding downward at an equally impressive speed. This explained the fractured skull, minor abrasions and the broken collar bone, as listed in section 3 of the accident report form.
Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley. Fortunately by this time I had regained my presence of mind and was able to hold tightly to the rope, in spite of beginning to experience pain.
At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit the ground and the bottom fell out of the barrel. Now devoid of the weight of the bricks, that barrel weighed approximately 50 lbs. I refer you again to my weight. As you can imagine, I began a rapid descent, down the side of the building.
In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up. This accounts for the two fractured ankles, broken tooth and several lacerations of my legs and lower body.
Here my luck began to change slightly. The encounter with the barrel seemed to slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into the pile of bricks and fortunately only three vertebrae were cracked.
I am sorry to report, however, as I lay there on the pile of bricks, in pain, unable to move, I again lost my composure and presence of mind and let go of the rope and I lay there watching the empty barrel begin its journey back down onto me. This explains the two broken legs.
Okay then!!! Option #7... Drown oneself in pool!!! Bought a couch cover because Mom picked at the couch so much, it was disgusting. So what does she do now? Takes the cover off every time no one is looking!!!! Damn, damn, double damn!!! Move the couch into the living room and shut the door. Out of sight, out of mind! Take her to the bathroom before supper, which is tomato rice soup and fresh bruschetta with fresh garlic, tomatoes and basil, a little olive oil, and fresh mozzarella on baguette bread slices. What does she do? Jumps up off the toilet at least 10 times in 30 seconds while I'm trying to clean her but. Takes off her pants and the clean pull-up 3 times while I'm cleaning said but. Gett her tied back into her wheelchair and she tries tearing off into the unknown! Have a major struggle getting the apron on, then sit her at the table and give her the food. Well, all downhill from there! Bruschetta everywhere but in her mouth. Both hands in her soup, then rubbed onto both arms and the table, all while I'm trying to get her to stay at the table!!! The brakes are on, on the wheelchair, but she is so strong that she keeps loosening them up by pushing on the brake handles constantly. Mind you, she has never driven a car in her life, but she uses those brake levers like they are a shift!!! So while I'm trying to hold the chair against the table, she is getting food everywhere! Took everything away and had to clean her up with a wet face TOWEL. Washcloth wasn't big enough for that mess! Now she is tied to the rocking chair with her "Posey vest", while I'm here writing this down as a form of cooling off my brain before it fries!!! And my sibs would say, "why do you yell at Mom?" Getting her ready for bed should be real fun tonight. The full moon isn't even until next Friday, so what is her excuse this time? Oh yeah! They said she had a good poop at daycare today! That must be it!!! Okay, watch her on camera for a few, then try to get some food in her, then bed.MAYBE!!!!
Here Here! Bobbie! Wonderful rebuttal to the so called expert. God, how frustratingly stupid experts can be. Cuz those jokes are sooo funny. We all need this. Thanks. Jen, that's a funny diahrrea song. I remember singing something like that when I was a kid. And like you I marvel at where it can end up. That's why I always cover my toothbrushes. Lord! All the stuff flying around in the air when the toilet is flushed! I'm not a germaphobe by any means but some things just gross me out. Hey Linda. Hope your day has gone fairly well. That's usually as good as it gets. Maybe your energy level will be better tomorrow. Maxine....I want to be like you when I grow up! lol! Kathy...you are strong and brave and I admire you greatly. Christina..hey neighbor. Let's do coffee one morning. I'll make the muffins. How's mama? Annie!!!! I'm gonna come see you one day when my ship comes in. We'll walk the emeral green hills together and talk and talk. Rossella!! When I get to Ireland I'll hop on over to your place too. So beautiful!! Something for me to hang my dreams on. SS...I don't know what to say.....good lord!! I pray for you too. And I can so relate. Ssk...hey there. Hope you're doing ok. 1dayatatime....Funny, I just told a friend of mine that I take life one day at a time. I've learned so much in the last 10 years and each day reading the posts from all of you, I learn more and more. Those whom I missed....l hope your days are going well and your stress is staying low. Well, mama fell again last night. I checked on her at 12, 1 and 3 am and she was snoring. Then when the hospice girl came this morning she saw a huge cut on mom's arm and it was purple. She must have gotten up between 3 and 6:30am and fallen. I don't know what to do to stop this. By 3am I'm so tired I sleep pretty soundly. Mama won't make a sound when she falls so I don't pick anything up from the baby monitor. I commented to the nurse the other day that I only knew she was in the bathroom during the nite cause I hear the toilet flushing. So now mom's not flushing the toilet at night. Took her to get it xrayed and nothing is broken, thank goodness. I hate myself for thinking this but....all my life when she didn't want me to do something or didn't like what I was doing, she would do something like get sick or hurt or faint. Something to make me feel bad for going against her will. Last nite I went to a movie with my son. She didn't want me to go. She never wants me to go anywhere, even in the house. So I was a little worried about what I would find when I got home last nite. But she was fine. Sleeping. Then later she got hurt. I know it's stupid I guess to think that she would fall on purpose just to control me. But she has done it in the past. I think I told you all how in 1991 she got angry at me and got drunk and passed out on her floor furnace. Spent 2 mos in the burn unit. Bad thing was that I knew she was going to do something I just didn't know what, so since I was working, I sent my son over to check on her and he found her there burned to a crisp. I was guilt ridden for ages until I finally got it into my head that I didn't cause it, can't control it and can't cure it. She is a drama junkie. That's her. The flip side is that she is sooooo sweet. It's just crazy. It would take someone with more psychological insite here to figure this out for me. I just go with it now. I think she's trying to back out of the trip to VA. She's acting pitiful. Almost every time in past years when we plan to take up there she gets sick at the last minute. My dil is trying to get an extra day off from work so we won't have to hurry back and have another day to rest up. That would be much better for mom. But if she decides she doesn't feel like going I may just have her go to the home again for a respite and go without her. I bet she'd change her mind real quick and decide to go. I cant' stay in this house 24/7/365. She's happy doing that, but I'm not. And I'm going to take care of me. And not feel guilty about it!! ya'll take care...love you all. Here's a big hug for you all. XXXXX :) Ann
jsomebody , sounds like he needs to take something to stop that diarreah or he s gonna shit himself to death . run outside and let ur mom do all t he cleaning . man i so sorry . happy that u won 9 bucks ! girl u keep on trying , if u always win small one day ure gonna strike big ! i never strike anything but matches to lite my ciggy . hack hack . not feeling too good today , no enegery , feelin blah . think allgery is messed me up bad . checkin in to say hi and thinking of u all . xoxo
God I want some of Kuli's "muffin"....could do with being sedated away in la la land..........Hey it has been over 90 for four days now, guess what it is causing...Yep..Diarrhea...
You wipe it off the seat only to find it on your feet diarrhea...diarrhea
The task is never small once you find it on the wall diarrhea...diarrhea
When it's smeared into the sheets does it matter it's the heat...diarrhea..diarrhea
Yeah I feel his pain and then I clean again...diarrhea...diarrhea...
Suggest he get a shower and he bitches, crabs and cowers...diarrhea...diarrhea...
No option six, maybe I don't deserve it, but I want it and I am just so fucking tired of this rotten life. Hey here's pathetic...I won $9, on a scratch ticket, so I was able to cover my Basic Health for August...mmm yes glory...whatever. Moms B day this weekend. Jerko brother coming up, yes lovely. Think I'll sleep in. Errands again, we need to go before it hits 80 here.
Hope all are well, or well enough where ever they are stuck....
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Cuz, you are a funny so and so to be sure.
We are still moving books and another thousand or so went out to the Quakers again yesterday. Their school libraries are getting fat and happy and they are so cool with distributing the books to other schools as well.
Sanity through education.
We had mulitple copies of the same editions of much of Shakespeare so they can actually use them to play act in class because all the actors can have their own script.
Books are all we do here for the time being and I have the utmost respect for those still deep in the trenches of active caregiving. Dealing from deep within the trench of active PTSD is bad enough and I hope that those of us who have gone on before so to speak will help those who are following to hopefully avoid this part of the process.
I emailed Pirate and she replied and I don't think that she will be posting much anymore. She is trying to move on in her life and I totally respect that decision also. She asked me to say hello to all of you for her and she is coping with a crazy work environment and just doesn't want to think about caregiving and the associated problems and challenges. I know that all of you can appreciate that and despite the fact that in order to get to that point we have to suffer a huge loss I am sure that there are most who will welcome the end of it all and want to move on like Pirate. Good for her and I am serious.
Ted would often wonder why I was still here because my caregiving job was over. I told him that I was still here and Miz is still here because of the support we recieved and still recieve and that we know there just isn't that much support out there for active caregivers and boy did I wish there had been something like this when I started out taking care of mom. There is room for another 1000 threads like this one and another 100 websites and that would still only scratch the surface.
Maybe one day I will go and Miz may go but we are here for awhile longer while our friends cope with the unimaginable. Unimaginable to the DBs of the world anyhoo.
Don't know what go me on such a serious spin so to balance it out here are some
Quotes On Cats:
"Do not meddle in the affairs of cats, for they are subtle and will pee on your computer."
- Bruce Graham
"There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast."
- Unknown
"Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods. Cats have never forgotten this."
- Anonymous
"Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow."
- Jeff Valdez
"In a cat's eye, all things belong to cats."
- English proverb
"As every cat owner knows, nobody owns a cat."
- Ellen Perry Berkeley
"One cat just leads to another."
- Ernest Hemingway
"Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you later."
- Mary Bly
"Cats are rather delicate creatures and they are subject to a good many ailments, but I never heard of one who suffered from insomnia."
- Joseph Wood Krutch
"People that hate cats will come back as mice in their next life."
- Faith Resnick
"There are many intelligent species in the universe. They are all owned by cats."
- Anonymous
"I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior."
- Hippolyte Taine
"No heaven will not ever Heaven be; Unless my cats are there to welcome me."
- Unknown
"There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats."
- Albert Schweitzer
"The cat has too much spirit to have no heart."
- Ernest Menaul
"Dogs believe they are human. Cats believe they are God."
- Unknown
"Time spent with cats is never wasted."
- Colette
"Some people say that cats are sneaky, evil, and cruel. True, and they have many other fine qualities as well."
- Missy Dizick
"You will always be lucky if you know how to make friends with strange cats."
- Colonial American proverb
"Cats seem to go on the principle that it never does any harm to ask for what you want."
- Joseph Wood Krutch
"I got rid of my husband. The cat was allergic."
- Unknown
"My husband said it was him or the cat ... I miss him sometimes."
- Unknown
"Cats aren't clean, they're just covered with cat spit."
- Unknown
Happy Saturday all and Linda, please kiss Pa for his 88th birthday yesterday. I mean kiss him today because I don't think your lips can reach into yesterday...
Anybody have any jokes for a Saturday?
lovbob
Penguins
Did you ever wonder why there are no dead penguins
on the ice in Antarctica - where do they go ?
Wonder no more ! ! !
It is a known fact that the penguin is a very ritualistic
bird which lives an extremely ordered and complex life.
The penguin is very committed to its family and will
mate for life, as well as maintaining a form of
compassionate contact with its offspring throughout its life.
If a penguin is found dead on the ice surface, other
Members of the family and social circle have been
Known to dig holes in the ice, using their vestigial
Wings and beaks, until the hole is deep enough for
The dead bird to be rolled into and buried.
The male penguins then gather in a circle
Around the fresh grave and sing:
"Freeze a jolly good fellow"
"Freeze a jolly good fellow."
"Then they kick him in the ice hole."
You really didn't believe that I know anything about penguins, did you?
It's so easy to fool OLD People
Well enough of that.
Makes sense, #1
A friend's husband works as a service technition for
a large extermanating company. One of the rules of the
company is to confirm each appointment bt phoning the
household the night before his service call.
" Hi, this is Gary from A to Z Pest Control Company.
Your wife phoned us, he said one evening when a man
answered.
There was a lon silence, and then my friend's husband
heard the man on the other end say, "Honey, its for you.
Someone wants to talk to you about your relatives.
Makes sense, #2
A teacher wa giving a lesson on the circulation of the
blood. Trying to make the matter clear, he says, "Students,
if i stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run
into it and I'd turn red in the face. So why, when I'm stan-
ing upright in the ordinary position, the blood doesn't run
into my feet?"
Muttered a bored student, audibly: "It's because your
feet aren't empty."
Makes sense, #3
It take brains to run a bank. That is why bankers
leave both doors to the vault open and then chain the
pens to the counters.
Love Cuz
Rossella, I understand you wanting to give your DB friend the benefit of the doubt...sort of...all the while knowing that he is full of s*%t. When I told my dumber than dirt girl friend about mom falling Saturday nite she texted me.."well you know my feelings on that, right?" She had already voiced her opinion that if I keep mom here she will one day fall and kill herself. So I asked her which would be better, her falling in a NH where nobody cares about her and dying or falling at home where she is loved and cared for? Either way she would be dead, but at least she would die in a loving home and her last days would have been happy. She totally didn't get it because, she says, it will tie me down and I should think of myself too. So I knew exactly what she meant by that remark about her "feelings on this". I just texted back, "if your feelings have the words Nursing Home in them....forget it! but thanks for the encouragement". You think our DB expert would consider that exchange communicating? No..they just don't get it and obviously neither did our expert. Let's just shoot em all up with Novacain. What do you say, Christina? A syringe full of novacain straight in the brain. Nah...they'd never know the difference. Brain dead already.
Mom's BP has been up the last couple of days. I think she's worried about our trip to VA. I was talking about it today and I noticed the worried look on her face. I finally got her to tell me that she doesn't remember some of those people. (her grandchildren) so I said, hey do what I do...just smile and act like you know what's going on. They'll never know the difference. We had a good laugh about it and 30mis later I took her BP again and it had dropped 30 points. Isn't that something?
Hey to everyone...not even going to try to name you all. I feel so blessed that I have so many new friends that I can't keep up with all their names. Now that IS something!!
Gotta go get mom ready for bed now. C Ya...wouldn't want to B ya.....oh that's right I AM already.
Ahhhh... we now have a new one: Douchebag.
DB, Jr. good one Rossella and Christina.
So, if you try to talk to someone and they don't understand what you are talking about and try to blow sunshine up your skirt, they're a DB.
Example:
"Expert", DB
lovbob
This conversation is becoming surrealistic!
So you agree with Daniela! He is a douchebag (or worse)! Well he is much younger than me and he just got married and he went to Galapagos on honeymoon, his parents are both alive and well, he is rich... Of course he thinks that everybody has to be happy! Bobbie, can you have a clean shot by telephone? Do cellphonesnipers exist?
Ya, tequila is clear, vodka is clear, some rum is clear...
EverClear is Clear........
And of course when you can get a clean shot at a douchebag......
Ya, you just want to say: communicated on this why don'tcha....
Selfish Sib and Maxine! thanks for the hug!
raining here and we really need it so good.
Cuz!! it was really good to talk to you!
lovbob
That's all. I was just toughtful yesterday night.
Linda happy birthday to dad.
Christina, good idea (did I understand well? Would you like your husband to work for that structure which takes care of hearing problems?)
Bobbie, yes a clean shot is the only way to solve some situations because when people get so crazy you have just to avoid they kill other people.
What else? I'll re-read your posts later and will tell you more. I wanted just to reassure you. I am well. And todayt I swam for 1/4 of a mile, which is not bad considering that it was my 2nd time in the swimming pool after 3 years!!!!
i wonder if we could do that here at home ?? anybody ever know about this , i know back in the cowboys days we did that but mmm this is 2011 , save people tons of money !
rossella - im worried about u too . plz get some rest and fill us in later .
christina- good to hear from you ! isnt iphone wonderful . keep in touch where ever u go :-)
miz- whats up girl ? did u find out anything about the job ? i wonder if u could go back to ur old job and they d hire u back ? i pray for u to get the job that fits u well and makes u happy and look forward to get up and go to work .
cuz- i am so sorry about that shooting . damn people just dont have any morals ! so heart aching !
today is pa s bday 88 yrs old !
ssk !! whats up girl ?? havent heard from u in a long while . new people movin in and keeping u on ur toes ? keep in touch . xoxo
yes bobbie it is wonderful to see rip here and there . im hollaring for harper to give her a hug and a lick on the face :-) . woof woof .
annie - annt - careshare- ss- pirate- jsomebody- oh plz lord dont let me forget whoe les ,w aaaaaaaaaaaa my mind just went blank . it does that when im trying to think who eles , blank blink blooop . dead mind ! deef ! dflex!! ah its a comin back now . austin !!! woo ! soon u ll have a road trip !! u becareful out there ok .
gotta go walk the dogs , arf arf xoxoxo
Miz! We found a great guy who owns a hearing aid center, as Mother's old pair got shattered at the last place she was in, plus, My hubby needs Help badly. Hr is thinking he has neurological problem, as his eye and ear on left side both have major damage from 2 separate accidents. I was thinking the other day how nurturing you are, and if you did not want to work in NH or daycare for kids, what would be an ideal place for you-- this sounds great. I asked Sam who is the hearing tech, if he is a doctor. He said he took enough school to do what he had to, plus has a MBA and is an electrical engineer, but could not finish last segment in med school because could not stand to see little children with deafness. Then he started to cry. What a sweet man:) I said, yes, we came to the right place. Bless is heart. We are going this afternoon to have first fitting after molds were made 2 wks ago.
Well, good luck with that opportunity, Miz.
Everyone, have a wonderful HOT day. Writing this on my iPhone and cannot check for mistakes, so will write more later when I can see what I'm doing!
Am enjoying reading and 'feeling' the current crew, and it is a good one.
Love you guys. Hugs, Christina xo
Annie! love the bricklayer's story.
I like the tradition of having a wake. The wake last night for your friend's dad sounded wonderful. What nice people.
Cuz! I hope that there is no more collateral damage from this insane person and that SWAT gets a clear head shot. How awful. Please try to remember not to internalize the insanity of others. That's one of the things that we all fight on a daily basis. Including the urge to get a clean head shot.
Just looked it up and the guy got his own clean head shot.....
Rossella! omg what has happened? we are all waiting to hear. Hope you are as ok as you can be considering the circumstances.
Kuli! you are an amazing daughter! I am glad that you and your dad are strong together and my neck hurt so bad last night I thought about having a muffin also....
Jen! VERY funny poop song. If there was ever a caregiver convention we should have a talent show and everyone get up and do 5 minutes of their best omg material....
DEEF!! stay healthy or we won't be able to hang out on the boat! I can't even imagine what you are going through with your mom and the fact that she gets everything everywhere and shreds everything everywhere. eeeeeeeek!
Rip! it was good to see a line from you here and there!
Miz! got to choose happy over sad! boy oh boy do I know that it's easier said than done! Love you lots and I hope that you can feel better soon and get the job of your dreams with the hearing aid people.
I want to see you post and gripe about having to hear people say "What??" all day until you can cure them.
ok. the guy is here to help us move more books....
more later,
lovbob
Lov Cuz
Annt - you know why it's so green here - cause it never stops bloody raining! It's been like Monsoon weather here for the past few days (on the plus side, I don't have to water my Flower Pots, my Lawn or the shrubs!). Supposed to clear up at weekend. God I hope so. I'm just so sick of this rain.
Toilet Duties - It's amazing what you get used to. I don't even gag anymore no matter what!
Deefer - your Mom takes the Biscuit or was that the Tomato Soup! Would be funny if not so frustrating for you. Hang in there and Breathe.....
Got back from a wake this evening. A friend and Colleague's Dad passed away yesterday. He was 87 and my friend had looked after him at home for the last 10yrs as well as working full time. She had a barrage of home help staff coming in and with some help from a sister and brother she managed though the bulk of the responsiblity was on her. She is so sad yet so relieved that her Dad was able to be taken care of at home and to pass away in his own home surrounded by family and friends. Isn't it the way we would all want to go. Don't know about the USA but the tradition of waking the person in their own home has really come back into use here and is now almost the norm rather than going to a funeral home. Two other colleagues and I drove to our friends home for the wake. Her Dad was laid out there in the Family Room. Neighbours were in the Kitchen making pots and pots of tea for all the callers and there was loads of food - home made cakes, pies and cookies. Some of the Neighbours stayed on washing up duty so there would always be dishes available. I thought it was really nice and would love to do that when my Mom passes away but since there is estrangement in the family (one of my sisters and I don't talk and will not be talking ever again!) so how could I do this and bar her from my home for Mom's funeral. Wouldn't put it past her to stand outside my home telling her story to everyone coming in! On the useless siblings thread - this is related. This sister who told me back in 1998 when I came home from the USA and my Dad had already had a stroke and Mom was in the early stages of Dementia - 'there will be no help from here, so don't ask' and I never did! Will have to think long and hard about it.
Dear Sir,
I am writing in response to your request for additional information in Block 3 of the accident report form. I put 'poor planning' as the cause of my accident. You asked for a fuller explanation and I trust the following details will be sufficient.
I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was working alone on the roof of a new six-story building. When I completed my work, I found that I had some bricks left over which, when weighed later were found to be slightly in excess of 500 lbs. Rather than carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower them in a barrel by using a pulley, which was attached to the side of the building
on the sixth floor.
Securing the rope at ground I went up to the roof, swung the barrel out and loaded the bricks into it. Then I went down and untied the rope, holding it tightly to ensure a slow descent of the bricks. You will note in Block 11 of the accident report form that I weigh 135 lbs.
Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel, which was now proceeding downward at an equally impressive speed. This explained the fractured skull, minor abrasions and the broken collar bone, as listed in section 3 of the accident report form.
Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley. Fortunately by this time I had regained my presence of mind and was able to hold tightly to the rope, in spite of beginning to experience pain.
At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit the ground and the bottom fell out of the barrel. Now devoid of the weight of the bricks, that barrel weighed approximately 50 lbs. I refer you again to my weight. As you can imagine, I began a rapid descent, down the side of the building.
In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up. This accounts for the two fractured ankles, broken tooth and several lacerations of my legs and lower body.
Here my luck began to change slightly. The encounter with the barrel seemed to slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into the pile of bricks and fortunately only three vertebrae were cracked.
I am sorry to report, however, as I lay there on the pile of bricks, in pain, unable to move, I again lost my composure and presence of mind and let go of the rope and I lay there watching the empty barrel begin its journey back down onto me.
This explains the two broken legs.
I hope this answers your inquiry.
Patrick Given,
Glass & Aluminium Pty Ltd
Bought a couch cover because Mom picked at the couch so much, it was disgusting. So what does she do now? Takes the cover off every time no one is looking!!!! Damn, damn, double damn!!!
Move the couch into the living room and shut the door. Out of sight, out of mind! Take her to the bathroom before supper, which is tomato rice soup and fresh bruschetta with fresh garlic, tomatoes and basil, a little olive oil, and fresh mozzarella on baguette bread slices.
What does she do? Jumps up off the toilet at least 10 times in 30 seconds while I'm trying to clean her but. Takes off her pants and the clean pull-up 3 times while I'm cleaning said but. Gett her tied back into her wheelchair and she tries tearing off into the unknown! Have a major struggle getting the apron on, then sit her at the table and give her the food. Well, all downhill from there!
Bruschetta everywhere but in her mouth. Both hands in her soup, then rubbed onto both arms and the table, all while I'm trying to get her to stay at the table!!! The brakes are on, on the wheelchair, but she is so strong that she keeps loosening them up by pushing on the brake handles constantly. Mind you, she has never driven a car in her life, but she uses those brake levers like they are a shift!!! So while I'm trying to hold the chair against the table, she is getting food everywhere! Took everything away and had to clean her up with a wet face TOWEL. Washcloth wasn't big enough for that mess! Now she is tied to the rocking chair with her "Posey vest", while I'm here writing this down as a form of cooling off my brain before it fries!!!
And my sibs would say, "why do you yell at Mom?" Getting her ready for bed should be real fun tonight. The full moon isn't even until next Friday, so what is her excuse this time? Oh yeah! They said she had a good poop at daycare today! That must be it!!!
Okay, watch her on camera for a few, then try to get some food in her, then bed.MAYBE!!!!
Cuz those jokes are sooo funny. We all need this. Thanks.
Jen, that's a funny diahrrea song. I remember singing something like that when I was a kid. And like you I marvel at where it can end up. That's why I always cover my toothbrushes. Lord! All the stuff flying around in the air when the toilet is flushed! I'm not a germaphobe by any means but some things just gross me out.
Hey Linda. Hope your day has gone fairly well. That's usually as good as it gets. Maybe your energy level will be better tomorrow.
Maxine....I want to be like you when I grow up! lol!
Kathy...you are strong and brave and I admire you greatly.
Christina..hey neighbor. Let's do coffee one morning. I'll make the muffins. How's mama?
Annie!!!! I'm gonna come see you one day when my ship comes in. We'll walk the emeral green hills together and talk and talk.
Rossella!! When I get to Ireland I'll hop on over to your place too. So beautiful!! Something for me to hang my dreams on.
SS...I don't know what to say.....good lord!! I pray for you too. And I can so relate.
Ssk...hey there. Hope you're doing ok.
1dayatatime....Funny, I just told a friend of mine that I take life one day at a time. I've learned so much in the last 10 years and each day reading the posts from all of you, I learn more and more.
Those whom I missed....l hope your days are going well and your stress is staying low.
Well, mama fell again last night. I checked on her at 12, 1 and 3 am and she was snoring. Then when the hospice girl came this morning she saw a huge cut on mom's arm and it was purple. She must have gotten up between 3 and 6:30am and fallen. I don't know what to do to stop this. By 3am I'm so tired I sleep pretty soundly. Mama won't make a sound when she falls so I don't pick anything up from the baby monitor. I commented to the nurse the other day that I only knew she was in the bathroom during the nite cause I hear the toilet flushing. So now mom's not flushing the toilet at night. Took her to get it xrayed and nothing is broken, thank goodness.
I hate myself for thinking this but....all my life when she didn't want me to do something or didn't like what I was doing, she would do something like get sick or hurt or faint. Something to make me feel bad for going against her will. Last nite I went to a movie with my son. She didn't want me to go. She never wants me to go anywhere, even in the house. So I was a little worried about what I would find when I got home last nite. But she was fine. Sleeping. Then later she got hurt. I know it's stupid I guess to think that she would fall on purpose just to control me. But she has done it in the past. I think I told you all how in 1991 she got angry at me and got drunk and passed out on her floor furnace. Spent 2 mos in the burn unit. Bad thing was that I knew she was going to do something I just didn't know what, so since I was working, I sent my son over to check on her and he found her there burned to a crisp. I was guilt ridden for ages until I finally got it into my head that I didn't cause it, can't control it and can't cure it. She is a drama junkie. That's her. The flip side is that she is sooooo sweet. It's just crazy. It would take someone with more psychological insite here to figure this out for me. I just go with it now.
I think she's trying to back out of the trip to VA. She's acting pitiful. Almost every time in past years when we plan to take up there she gets sick at the last minute. My dil is trying to get an extra day off from work so we won't have to hurry back and have another day to rest up. That would be much better for mom. But if she decides she doesn't feel like going I may just have her go to the home again for a respite and go without her. I bet she'd change her mind real quick and decide to go. I cant' stay in this house 24/7/365. She's happy doing that, but I'm not. And I'm going to take care of me. And not feel guilty about it!!
ya'll take care...love you all. Here's a big hug for you all. XXXXX :)
Ann
happy that u won 9 bucks ! girl u keep on trying , if u always win small one day ure gonna strike big ! i never strike anything but matches to lite my ciggy . hack hack .
not feeling too good today , no enegery , feelin blah . think allgery is messed me up bad .
checkin in to say hi and thinking of u all .
xoxo
You wipe it off the seat only to find it on your feet diarrhea...diarrhea
The task is never small once you find it on the wall diarrhea...diarrhea
When it's smeared into the sheets does it matter it's the heat...diarrhea..diarrhea
Yeah I feel his pain and then I clean again...diarrhea...diarrhea...
Suggest he get a shower and he bitches, crabs and cowers...diarrhea...diarrhea...
No option six, maybe I don't deserve it, but I want it and I am just so fucking tired of this rotten life. Hey here's pathetic...I won $9, on a scratch ticket, so I was able to cover my Basic Health for August...mmm yes glory...whatever. Moms B day this weekend. Jerko brother coming up, yes lovely. Think I'll sleep in. Errands again, we need to go before it hits 80 here.
Hope all are well, or well enough where ever they are stuck....