Follow
Share
This discussion has been closed for comment. Start a New Discussion.
Jen, you get to that pool. I'm like you I love water.
Fixed Thanksgiving dinner for everyone on Saturday. Mom was her usual crabby, whiny complaining self. My best friend brought a couple of dishes, and all mom could do was criticize. So embarrassing. Fortunately, stepdad packed her up and took her home early.
Jen, I talked to another friend who recently retired from a library job. Asked him how he got hired. He said he started out as a volunteer, and when a paid position came up they gave it to him.
(2)
Report

Out of the mouth of babes
This is what happens when your child is exposed to too many commercials on TV. A Baptist pastor was presenting a children's sermon.
During the sermon, he asked the children if they knew what the resurrection was. Now, asking questions during children's sermons is crucial, but at the same time, asking children questions in front of a congregation can also be very dangerous.Having asked the childr...en if they knew the meaning of the resurrection,
a little boy raised his hand........
The pastor called on him and the little boy said, "I know that if you have a resurrection that lasts more than four hours you are supposed to call the doctor." It took over ten minutes for the congregation to settle down enough for the service to continue.

Have a great day in the Lord.
(2)
Report

Countryside-
funny about urine specimens, had my mom to the doc for one. She naturally couldn't go. Went to waiting room to have her drink water. Finally she thought she could get the job done. Back to the restroom, oops, still nothing. I went back to waiting room for more water, mom took little sip, then set the water cup on sink, still waiting, finally success. Took another drink of water. She then looked at the water cup, remembered that she had drank from that cup. Panicked because she thought she had drank the the specimen. The look on her face, was priceles!L0L! We sure had fun with that one.
(3)
Report

agree bobmiester..volunteering can lead to paid employment....
(1)
Report

Hi crew!
It's been quite awhile since I last posted but I sure have missed you all. I'm doing pretty good. I'm working full time and actually escorting some tours. Trying to get my life re-established financially has been a slow process, but at least I have a roof over my head. I went to Savannah to spend Thanksgiving with my best friend and her family. It was the first family celebration I had been part of in over 3 years. I enjoyed the cooking, eating and friendship. My gift from Thanksgiving was a bad case of bronchitis. I have been coughing my head off. I don't have a cold, but something went straight to my chest and I have been a coughing fool since last Wednesday.
Well I am going to try get on to Healthcare.gov and see if I have any success getting a less expensive plan that I can afford. Being without insurance has been tough. Take care everyone and I'm sending lots of hugs. Love ya, Diane
(5)
Report

HI everyone,
Hope everyone had a good holiday.

Well momma is doing good, no cold or infection progressing.

Jen, hang in there and Get to the Y, It will be good for you. And volunteering at the library would be wonderful outlet also! Take advantage of any opportunity to get out and away for a bit!!!

I am so frustrated with the mortage company been waiting on them sending a check for two weeks now and apparently went usmail instead of FedEx as they told me it would. well still should have been here last week. Waiting to see if they are sending a replacement, overnight this time! It did warm up a bit last week but next couple days taking a dip again!

Good to hear good news from you DTFlex!!!
Everyone, Captn, cuz, meanwhile, mame, everyone hang in there!
Peace
Juju
(2)
Report

ok I just checked and they sent a check yesterday, did the tracking on it and it made it from Seattle to a town 40 miles north of me then they sent it from there back up to Portland, 200 miles north, Ughhhhhhhh, what the heck? So it will not be here today I assume, but at least tomoro I hope....which is scheduled to be the coldest day of the season so far! I cannot believe this tho...this check is jinxed! I bet the original is in mail today after they stopped payment, lol!!!! OH well!!!
(1)
Report

Juju, hope that check gets where it belongs soon. Diane, so good to hear from you, get over that cough. My boss seems to have it, hope I don't catch it. Gladimhere, the urine specimen, reminds me last time I had to take my Mom to the Dr. She had a UTI, and couldn't pee. The nurse tried giving her water to drink, but she doesn't like city water it has chlorine in it, so I go to the grocery store and buy her bottled water, she says it tastes funny, she won't drink that either. So I go back to the store to get her cranberry juice, you guessed it she didn't like the kind I bought. I had bought myself a zero calorie power aid, and she looks at that, and thinks it looks good (because I was drinking it). It's been hours we have been waiting for her to pee in the @#$%^ cup, so I give here the zero, and finally she can give the Dr a urine specimen.
(1)
Report

He yelled at mom and accused her of lying about how often he has been in the bathroom....been three days again now....Yes we make this s*** up because it is so fun...stupid old bastard...
(0)
Report

Hi everyone Im really new to this. Im the youngest of 13 kids and the only one who would step up to look after our dad. He is starting to do things that are destructive or harmful. he is 85 im 45. How do I get him to stop...or do I? is there a nice way to say your not allowed to do that anymore.
(1)
Report

Welcome Crystalx, don't know what to tell you about your Dad. Hope your not talking about driving. My mother gave up driving, but my step dad refuses to give up his car keys. But this is a great site to vent your frustrations. Your a good daughter to try and take care of your father when he needs help, just remember to try and look after yourself.
Well, Jen, it sounds like FP is getting worse. Hang in there it will end.
(2)
Report

That's what I am thinking...
No money for the Y... Therapist said demand it for your mental and emotional health...So I did! Sign up Friday....Jen
(3)
Report

Hang in there dear Jen. Things are going to happen when you least expect it. It will all fall into place and you will be on the way to being a new lady with all the new stuff that will be set in front of you. Hugs to you many times over.
luvCuz
(2)
Report

Moms starting to talk about bringing his tax info in to the Y as well...so be it ma, you wanna pay 108 instead of 31 because his money is counted as our money even when he doesn't pay us squat...so be it!
what ever, going to pick up the snow thrower...hope we don't need it...
(0)
Report

I had no idea any of this can happen. Thank you, truly. If it happens, I won't be surprised.
(2)
Report

Nope giving up the driving was easy however that has been the only easy thing he has done. Nope, I'm talking about turning on the stove, washing the dishes and letting them melt on the stove. I now un plug the stove every morning, before I leave for work. Unfortunately trying to get someone in all day has been more difficult then I thought. Home care gives me 45 mins 2 days a week. how ever she stays for 6 mins. and leaves. Teddy cam., want to make sure no one was hurting my dad. I cant quit my job or we will end up living in my car. Thanks for listening and the hug. it really helps to hear from everyone. your ideas and stories have really helped me understand this disease so again THANK YOU!
(4)
Report

Jen~good for you in demanding the funds to sign up at the Y, you deserve it!!
Jennifers~It does happen so be prepared!

My sister got bad news from from employer of 26 years. They reduced her hours to 20 a week. This affects her health insurance with will run out soon. She is only 60 years old...not old enough for SS, I don't know if she can get medicare for her health issues, and I doubt she can get food stamps. This is big blow to sis, her health is declining...mental fog...you can google it. She has times where she can't say or pronounce words, do simple arithmetic and I know she is not eating right for the diabetes issues. She thinks if she is keeping her blood sugar under control she is ok, but she is not getting or eating meat for protein. Financially she is in a hard place. She thinks she can handle a second part time job even if it means working late at night. Her employer will let her work the 20 hours how ever it fits her needs.

Thanksgiving went well for us. We moved mom into anther room , decorating it before we moved her since she won't let us decorate since it makes it permanent to her. Her old room wasn ear an exit that residents will try to escape through, then in their confusion, would try to get in mom's room. Mom has been standing guard at door. The new room is larger, we moved over a love seat plus the bathroom is private,,,she doesn't have to with nest door resident, and lock on her door with a key so she feels more secure. The caregivers have a key to get in.

Blessings to everyone, I hope you are all doing as well as can be expect with your situations!!
Sharyn
(1)
Report

Sorry to hear about your sisters reduced work load, man they are gonna kill us with money....

here.....you know....the usual bullshit....




My mom asked me an hour ago... "You were just going to check out the Y right, didn't you say you wanted to just go look?....." and "How are you going to do the finances?"

I looked at her and said..."I HAVE no money..." (duh) The two hundred I got for Dec gone to hospital bills co pay and medication that doesn't help me sleep or stop the nightmares....


I told my therapist Wednesday, I have to give up on ever getting what I need from my mother, she was never there for me and she never will be...This is like, the year she asked if I wanted to just do left overs for my birthday....

God, s*** pants has his crap muzak on..."There goes my reason for living..."

Not mine! I am gonna go cry and pout in the basement and remember I have better things ahead...maybe I will take fifteen bucks and go swim one day and see how I like it...


God when is he gonna die...

Oh and she just deposited $27,000 into his savings from yet another annuity that came due...she has sent a check to her sister for two thousand (you know her sister in the $300,000 home who told me I should just go get a job and give her some money) and one for herself...Grandma used to give then money twice a year....

He's singing, moms snapping at the elderly dog, who is only slightly less incontinent than her father....she doesn't want to do the vet check ups either. Fine. God where is that asteroid...

Pray for me, it is just a misery here...
i hear you cuz. I am hoping for better....

Jen
(2)
Report

Oh Jen,
I am so sorry about your mom. She has the disease and can't help. She's saying one thing and 10 minutes later doing another! WTF!! Not just or sane.

Steal the money and save yourself!!! Don't let them do this to you because then it will be dementia claiming 3 lives instead of 2! Survive this so yu can live because wonderful things are waiting for you!

Jen and Crew, I have hesitated telling you guys because I know how much each of you, in the trenches, are suffering.
Mame! Jen! Juju!

For the past few days I have been on a yacht delivery with her owner as first mate and cook. Even though the owner is a sweetheart who lost his wife 3 years ago and is just now surfacing from his grief. He still will tear up and tell me another story about a pretty cool lady and I just listen and try to make the right noises at the right times because at the end of the day we all need to be listened to.

I never thought I would be happy again or able to laugh and have fun doing something. I love boats and working on this boat is a joy. I only cook half the time because he just wants to go out and do the restaurant thing.

I am so lucky. I will enjoy this while it lasts!

It's been a little over 3 years since my mom died and I was her full time caregiver. It's taken awhile for me to work through the anger and despair and move on but I am proof it can be done.
We have success stories here of survival of one of the most brutal situations an unsuspecting person can be thrust into.
Austin and Ted come to mind immediately. Meanwhile, even though you are dealing with your mom and all of that responsibility. I love it that Indio is there and you guys are making a life.

There are more I know but it's getting near departure time and I can't think to write!
Sharynmarie! the new room sounds good for your mom and sorry about your sister. That sux.

OK, I had more folks to write but he just started the engines and we have to switch over the power so I have to turn off the computer.
Detroit 892s. They sound so good!

love you guys way more than you'll ever know.

lovbob
(2)
Report

Bobbie good for you!! Every one of us deserves happiness!

"The wicked envy and hate; it is their way of admiring"
(2)
Report

Bobbie good to hear from you. A friend from our senior center had just moved into an AL and now has had a stroke-I went to see her today and she is not doing well-I do not expect her to make sometimes I wish I was not a nurse-I passed on the information to two of her good friends-it is so sad-she had been so excited two weeks ago about the AL and now this-have to remember we are not promised a tomarrow -this brings it home about not sweating the small stuff.
(2)
Report

I feel you, today my dad ate chocolate cake I had hidden (not well I must say) with tongs... yes tongs, the kind you flip bacon with... HOW??? I don't know he did it before anyone else got up. Growing up my parents were sticklers for chewing with your mouth closed(you'd get stabbed with a fork if they heard food smacking in your mouth) and tapped on the hand if you made the knife or fork scrape the plate. Now... it is like listening to a Great Dane at a Buffet table and more ends up on the floor than in his mouth, luckily his faithful dogs are there to eat it as it falls (ICK!!) I can't be in the same room sometimes, especially with soup, his speech therapist recommended soup more and so I TRY and do it. It happens to be a great diet though, he starts eating ... I stop. Good luck with your loved ones.
(3)
Report

Thanks bobmioetser and any one who prayed for me...IT WORKED...this morning mom said I have decided we are going to go down and get you signed up at the Y and get you a bus pass!!!!! omg I mean OMG!!!
had to deal with her flipping out about how to get into the parking lot and being mad, but she did it, put it on her credit card, they don't do cash...but I am a member!

I HAVE SEEN THE POOL AND IT IS GOOD!!!!

I am gonna go SWIMMING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and they can all get a look at my fat butt!:)

It will be ten degrees on Monday and I don't care...therapy....then swimming and no more lugging quarters for bus fare!

Take care stay safe and warm everyone...Jen
(7)
Report

My biggest problem is trying to keep the "This is completely normal and not totally freaking me out" act going as I try so desperately to allow my father to keep the dignity that he so deserves. But I have come across some problems doing so any suggestions on how to fix these kinks in my plan will be greatly appreciated.
Problems:
1. Now my father has gotten so used to nothing grossing me out he seems to think anything goes. I could put examples here but I am not kidding even this forum might not believe some of them. Images come to me at different times of the day and I mentally shudder and try to push them away.
2. As word has spread thru the family tree of my ability to handle anything relatives feel free to call me up to do things they themselves don't want to do. (Would you take Fido to the pound we can't have him in the house anymore. Hey do you know anything about septic systems, etc.)
Nobody tells you how hard you are going to work trying to balance doing what is needed of you and still trying to maintain that ever important dignity of someone who has loved and cared for you so selflessly in the past.
(3)
Report

Jen that is great. You so deserve something good in your life. You too Bobbi.
Austin, so sorry about your friend. Sharyn, hope something works out for your sister.
Welcome to the new people. Post whatever you like, it helps.
Cold and foggy here, but not as bad as farther north, and the power stayed on (so far). Did have a nice day on Wednesday (70 degrees). Indio and I saddled up the 2 young horses and went for a ride. Omaha decided to leap up a six foot bank with me. It was startling, but he is so graceful, I didn't loose my seat. Still made him go back and walk up the bank like he should. Hope everyone is staying warm, and has a good weekend.
(2)
Report

Wow - I'm impressed! Meanwhile2, I think the rider must be pretty cool as well!
(3)
Report

Good Morning Crew,

Thanks for the positive thoughts meanwhile and austin and assandache and all! Means a lot.

Jen! Going to the Y! Yes! Bus pass! Yes! I love me a nice pool too! You enjoy and enjoy and enjoy! Love you Jen and I know that we are all so glad you are going to be able to go.

We made Fernandina Beach yesterday afternoon and will be here for a day or two for an electrical repair.
This is a pretty town and marina and the sunsets are spectacular.

We were in the ICW and the voltage dropped on the port side of the boat and took out all of the gauges and instruments. We arrived with nothing more than a compass since the chartplotter, depth sounder, gps, radio, radar, everything! went dark. The ICW is pretty well marked but you can still run aground if you can't see the depth (depth sounder). We stayed behind a big trawler figuring that they had a similar draft and since Fernandina is right on the channel, we called them on the cell phone, showed up and they gave us a nice slip. Electrical repairs today.

The captain is a nice man and a new big boat owner. He is amazed at how many things can go sideways on a boat and how the thing can scare you to pieces.
While we were underway and the voltage was dropping it triggered a high water alarm in the bilges and that was scary.
I drove while he checked out the engine room and then he drove while I checked out the forward bilge. Dry as a bone thankfully.

This boat looks fancy and goes fast but it makes me thankful for my trawler more and more every day. My trawler is so much cheaper to run, as in miles per gallon as opposed to gallons per mile!

Welcome to the new posters: Countrymouse! MsCellophane40s! ypiffani! Crystalx10! Jennifers!

Good to see you Flex!

Cuz! How is everyone?

OK, I can hear the Captain moving about. Coffee time!

lovbob
(2)
Report

Bobbie that all sounds too scary for me! I like my feet planted on the ground...Though I do love the sunsets...
(2)
Report

good for you Bobbie you need to be happy-feels good doesn't it -being happy-I never expected to be really happy-the last nine months have been so wonderful-the bad long years are being pushed away.
(3)
Report

Jen good for you -you so deserve things to go your way for a change-enjoy the Y
(1)
Report

This discussion has been closed for comment. Start a New Discussion.
Start a Discussion
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter