Hey folks, welcome to the new whine/general topic thread. Feel free to use this thread to discuss anything that is on your mind. Caregiving- related stuff, life after a loved one's death, your own emotional wellbeing. Whatever..........anything on your mind.
Ah, I see. It was in the local news.
It could have been an AB car that hit the cyclist, but most black cars don't have grey side mirrors.
I had to chuckle at the question "do you know why I pulled you over" because that's a standard one, it's as if they're hoping you'll say "why yes officer, I was doing xxx" (lol)
I can really recommend to everyone, no matter how old you are, take a holiday! It has done wonders for me but I do wish I didn't have to deal with insurance nd car repairs now. There has been only cooperation from them so it should go smoothly. The car is a 2014 but with very low mileage and was in good shape so I would like to get it repaired rather than replaced.
Watching old reruns of Murder She Wrote on Roku, your story would fit right in
where she writes of Cabot Cove in Maine strange happenings where innocent
people get arrested. Small town suspicions. That was some good police work
anyway.
Was it a small town?
After several years of not having one, not remembering what happened to the two we had, maybe we just don't need one.
No longer pulling each celery stem apart to cut it, I take the entire celery stalk and start cutting the whole thing in half, then continue to cut tiny slices that end up as chopped celery. Then re-wash the cut up pieces, put the rest back in the refrigerator. Time is short for being in the kitchen.
After the moose adventure we had another related one. Driving out of Goderich the police pulled us over and asked if we knew why. R answered, "No." Apparently someone riding a bicycle in Goderich was hit by a car last night. This person saw our car the next morning with the side mirror torn off and the moose damage and assumed we had hit them. They followed us out of town and called the cops. We had the police report reference number for the moose encounter and the receipt from the hotel in Sarnia as proof of our innocence and it all ended well for us. I could have shown them emails from my insurance company from a few days before but that wasn't needed. The young cop was embarrassed, poor guy.
We so enjoyed the trip and when I woke up this morning, my first thought was "Where are we going today?" Oh, well. Better do a little laundry first.🧺
Hope you got to see some pretty leaves, down in my area nothing much is turning yet because it's been so dry.
We are at the half way point of our holiday in a lovely little cabin/chalet by a stream in the woods near Quebec city. Travelling at my age means having to take more stuff than ever before, needing to rest more and so on but it is still absolutely worth it. R is off exploring Old Quebec today and I am enjoying this peaceful place. We will see whether I can sightsee Montmorency Falls tomorrow. Then it's hit the road again back to Ontario, a short stay there and then the three day drive back west followed by the chore of getting the car fixed.
Thankfully, I think R is finally realizing that we don't have years and years ahead to travel,
Would I do it again? In a heartbeat!!! 🍁🌲🌳🍁
Ouchie.
Take care of that toe!
I believe you. I've had those unbelievable accidents too. One time I was getting a piece of aluminum foil. The foil itself (not that blade on the box you cut it off with) sliced my finger open pretty bad. The place looked like a crime scene. From a piece of aluminum foil.
I totally agree with you about segregation in memory care facilities.
The problem is there are always more women as they live longer and they go to facility faster than men. Statistics show around 70% of women are providing care at home as opposed to 30% of men. Of course in each facility there will be different ratio and profit rules.
Even if some adjustments are made I am sure they leave some flexibility.
It very sad reality.
Burnt - I have to agree with you. We had just got mother settled into her room in the NH and were out in the hall talking to the nurse when a male patient in a wheelchair wheeled himself into her room. R went and wheeled him right out again. The nurses weren't too concerned, and put some yellow tape across her door, saying that that would stop him. Whether it did or not I don't know but it never was a problem that we were aware of again. Mother. fortunately, wasn't perturbed about it. If anything it added a little interest to her day. But it could have been a bad experience.
Patients in NHs and such have lost their filters and that needs to be taken into consideration when housing males and females. There are many examples of appropriate segregation which should be the case in NHs etc too.
In many places where both sexes interact there are areas where the sexes are segregated. Like male and female locker rooms in schools. Many colleges have 'co-ed' dorms but there's also an option of single-sex ones. In hospitals if a room is shared, it is men with men, women with women. In a hospital ward there will be many beds. It's the same thing. We have schools (some of them boarding schools) that are all male or all female. Prison is male or female. It is not mixed.
Why then are the sexes not segregated in a memory care facility? At least the bedrooms and showering facilities should be separate and locked so one sex can't wander over into a restricted area after hours. Why are mentally ill people put into nursing homes and not segregated when their group home or assisted apartment facility throws them out for bad behavior? A nursing home is not better equipped to deal with these people. Some CNA with a dozen or more nursing home/memory care residents on her schedule has to also deal with nut cases? Do they really belong with sick and invalid people? I don't think so.
There should be care facilities (NH, MC, or mental health facilities) that are exclusively male or female and that should be a choice.
Thank you, I will do that.
I was (and still am), pressured to jump into this electronic age and it is not working for me.
Due to family security issues, (all of his and my family), to protect him I taught him to NEVER allow anyone to be his POA.
This plan has only worked when he has been cooperative. That time is passing.
Even if there was a POA, he would get around it if he wanted something.
I can deal with the credit cards now that I know, so thanks.
I am not sure the changes in his behaviors are a dementia added to aspergers.
However, we live together and he can (if he does not want to cooperate) get
access without my permission. (called theft).
Things evolved with a shared online shopping account that is in his name, but credit cards in my name were used to pay the prime fees. Yes, that is crazy! My bad, as I wanted to trust him as I constantly monitored the account. Wanting to protect his autonomy and dignity.
Now, I cannot remove the credit cards, and no longer receive delivery notices.
He won't allow me to cancel his account, and I do not have POA. He has just now denied that credit cards in my name are used to pay for his account. Shows his lack of awareness, understanding, poor executive function, and other security issues.
My solution is to report my cards lost, and get a new number. Then increase my efforts at security for myself and him.
Maybe insist on a POA and see an attorney?
Losing ground....
Thank you.
I will copy and paste in my notes.
Maybe another topic of discussion is needed as grief really begins before and let’s not forget sick person is grieving too for what would have been and losses they encounter.
Eva, thinking of you particularly these days. So many here face grief.
You Don’t Just Lose Someone Once,
You lose them over and over,
sometimes many times a day.
When the loss, momentarily forgotten,
creeps up,
and attacks you from behind.
Fresh waves of grief as the realisation hits home,
they are gone.
Again.
You don’t just lose someone once,
you lose them every time you open your eyes to a new dawn,
and as you awaken,
so does your memory,
so does the jolting bolt of lightning that rips into your heart,
they are gone.
Again.
Losing someone is a journey,
not a one-off.
There is no end to the loss,
there is only a learned skill on how to stay afloat,
when it washes over.
Be kind to those who are sailing this stormy sea,
they have a journey ahead of them,
and a daily shock to the system each time they realise,
they are gone,
Again.
You don’t just lose someone once,
you lose them every day,
for a lifetime.
Credit - Donna Ashworth Words
AC experienced some sort of invasion of Indonesia BOTS posting and the email form they have not working and all sort of stuff, and in all the revamping a whole bunch of old messages got dumped back in the inbox of those of us who keep it emptied. Happened to me as well. In fact is STILL happening. I turned off messaging and deleting about 20 a day and still more (if fewer) are being dumped back into my slot. Pain in the neck and I often wonder anymore, crazy as the whole techy world is, if this or any other site is even safe anymore.
I aways delete them!
What is going on?