General topics.

We're past grass season Send, although I feel he wishes he could have been able to distinguish the leaves from my tree vs those from his so he could leave mine behind. I've got a big mower that cuts a 24" swath so I know if I follow the edge of the drive I've mower a straight line. Leaving a 6" wide tuft of grass only makes HIS front yard look ridiculous, and frankly I don't care. It is just so ridiculous.... I understand that is that it is my property 1' or 2' beside the driveway, but logic dictates that you would mow the whole front yard up to the neighbour's drive, which is what I do for the people living on the other side of me. When I bought the house I got a rough map showing the dimensions of the property, but since I haven't been able to locate a survey marker it doesn't do me any good. I'll be d___ed if I pay for a property survey, if it comes to that I'll use the info so I'll know where to put up an ugly (on his side) fence.

Received today in my private message:
Do not know this person.......

"Lauraralph posted on your message board 11/24/2017 at 4:53 pm
I'm Sgt Laura Ralph from USA

Email me right now at

( sergeantlauraralph7@gmail.com )

I will tell you in details the reason why i contacted you there ok."

Don't do it! Dangerous spam.

It is against AC policy to share e-mails for this reason!

.

.

.

Returning the grass clippings carefully to the other edge may work, if you lay them precisely. Guessing that would escalate a war, lead to a trespassing charge?

My passive aggressive neighbour - the one I confronted about blowing his grass clippings all over my driveway - has been playing little games this fall, first leaving a strip of long grass beside the drive beyond the 24" strip I've begun mowing (lol), now today he has hammered in a marker on what I assume is the property line between our houses. I don't know whether to continue being fake friendly or search for a pile of dog cr#p to leave in his front lawn.

Well that's over 🙄. All the management and office staff was there oozing bonhomie and everyone practically tripped over themselves making sure things went smoothly, we even had the DOC (DON) at our table pitching in. The "feeders" were all together in one corner of the dining room, poor B cried through most of the meal as she often does, reliving some kind of trauma or abuse. C sat in his usual place with two silent guests and as near as I could tell slept and didn't get fed much of anything. The meal was exactly as I expected except there were two vegetables instead of the usual one and there was a choice of ham or turkey. No effort was made to make the meal anything special for those eating puree, even the desserts were limited to pureed canned oranges (have you ever actually tasted those?) and pumpkin pie puree. Ah well, at least I know I was right to forget about trying to participate.

I remember reading questions earlier in the week about whether to bring an elder who has dementia to a Thanksgiving gathering.

I live on a cul-de-sac and the way my computer desk sits I pretty much have a front row seat to see coming and goings. Since the next door neighbor's tree came down in a storm, the view is even better....

Anyhow, my neighbor across the street has an elderly Mom who has dementia, who lives in a neighboring State in a nursing home. I was so surprised to see the neighbors brother and his wife pull into their driveway and in the car was their Mom. I could tell by the body language that it wasn't an easy trip. Everything must be going smoothly inside the house hours later as the car is still in the driveway.

CWillie, these were parties that I tried to graciously avoid after going to a few and getting smoke related headaches. These were "back in the day" when I was a 20-something wanting to establish good working relationships with peers, and later when I was a 30-something getting involved in politics.

Restaurants here have been nonsmoking for years, except for some of the ones like the sports bars, which I don't patronize.

I hope the meal isn't as unpleasant as you anticipate, but I've been in those facility dining rooms at meal time and the most appropriate characterization I would offer is depressing. People stare at each other or out the windows with that 1000 yard stare, I get depressed feeling sorry for them, then the whole range of life of people in 80s and 90s becomes more than I want to think about.


CM, I think our packages have a much broader travel experience than we do. Maybe we could hitch a ride on a package and at least get a tour of a few states?

But, on a related subject, if you want to be concerned about the expansion of companies seeking personal data to commoditize, read the TOS and privacy policies of companies such as UPS and the US post office, which now require execution of those offensive and onerous agreements just to find out where my package or a certified letter is.

I think we should return to courier (or is it carrier?) pigeons. At least they won't take my personal information and sell it to who knows what and where.


FF, maybe there's a shortage of mules now? I've found similar issues when adapting to ordering through the Internet, with literally nothing in stock at the stores, where I could see what I want, check the construction, buy it then and satisfy my need. I have to order it, check it out at the store and decide if I want it.

Oh, well, at least we can order things. I was thinking the other day about the people in Puerto Rico and other areas which are still recovering from the hurricanes. Those poor people are still so challenged just by daily living.

Countrymouse, at work I am so use to getting next day delivery of office supplies, that I have gotten spoiled.

When ordering clothes recently, the website says a clothes item is in stock, and then it takes 2 to 3 weeks before I receive delivery. Guess it depends where "in stock" is that located. Is it half way around the world and it takes a mule to get to get to the local post office. Or in stock means the material and threads are there, the garment needs to be made :P

Gosh I love the internet sometimes. Utterly hypnotised by the progress of my brave little yarn holder as it comes to mommy...


23 Nov, 2017 03:29
Processed Through Facility
ISC CHICAGO IL (USPS), US
22 Nov, 2017 13:31
Arrived at USPS Regional Facility
CHICAGO IL INTERNATIONAL DISTRIBUTION CENTER, US
22 Nov, 2017 09:01
In Transit to Destination
US
22 Nov, 2017 01:31
Arrived at Facility
ISC CHICAGO IL (USPS), US
21 Nov, 2017 04:01
Arrived at USPS Regional Facility
CLEVELAND OH DISTRIBUTION CENTER, US
20 Nov, 2017 15:47
Departed Post Office
NORTH FAIRFIELD, OH 44855, US
20 Nov, 2017 15:27
USPS in possession of item
NORTH FAIRFIELD, OH 44855, US
20 Nov, 2017 15:06
Shipping Label Created
N Fairfield, OH 44855, US

Just the Atlantic to cross, now. Fly, fly my pretty..!

Smoking at a dinner? Do they still allow that where you are GA?

The anxiety producing part is that I will - sort of - be attending the dinner, just not as a participant. All meals are served in the dining room unless someone is ill, so to accommodate guests there will be two sittings and obviously seating arrangements will be changed. I fear mom and I will be pushed in a corner and I will be left scrambling to find a chair to sit on so I can feed her the meal as I do every day. It could be fun, but I rather doubt it.

Gershun, I was amused by your comment that "if you want to become a President, actor or sports figure, remember eyes are watching." Unfortunately, the thing that is the current US President couldn't even reach that level of concern. Remember the comments he made in the trailer before he was elected? Sadly, the POTUS office isn't always an inhibition to improper behavior.

CWillie, I have a different take on "inflexibility." I would consider the decision not to attend the holiday gathering at the NH a wise decision, as well as a reflection that you're using your time more appropriately. Nor do I think it's necessarily a reflection of becoming older. Yes, it can be, but it's more of a discriminatory factor in selecting how to spend time.

I've felt this way about holiday gatherings for years, always finding a good excuse not to go when invited, especially for New Year's Eve gatherings in which I know everyone is going to be drinking. (Family gatherings are different; I always enjoyed those.)

My thoughts are these:

1. What would I get out of having to tolerate trivial remarks, someone else's smoking, developing a headache from smoke within about 10 minutes? Add to that the possibility of wandering hands, driving home at night in cold weather? Or undiscriminating smoochers who think that New Year's Eve is something to be celebrated by grabbing females and planting a sloppy kiss?

After decades, I 'm still trying to find a good answer beyond "nothing."

2. As an alternative, what would I get out of staying home, reading a good book, reading a gardening magazine and designing all sorts of formal garden beds that I'll probably never be able to implement? Or perusing a woodworking magazine and creating similar designs, dreaming of the day when I actually will have retirement leisure time and can start experimenting with marquetry or intarsia (even I determine myself lacking in woodworking skills)?

Or watching another version of the Nutcracker, after having seen performances in person and annually on tv for decades? Or a NYE program from Vienna, generally consisting of Strauss waltzes? Or just doing nothing?

The answer is relaxation, mental restoration, inspiration, comfort, peace....let me count the ways.

I think as we age we spend our time more discriminately, choosing those activities from which we can gain and turning down those which offer little or nothing.

Time is more precious as we slow down and have less of it for leisure, especially with caregiving. So we use it more wisely.

I'm feeling holiday anxiety and it's isn't even a holiday where I live, I guess it proves that moods are catching. Or maybe it is because the NH is hosting their "Family Christmas Dinner" this afternoon, I chose not to buy a ticket, I'm there every day to help mom with her meals anyway. I'm certain her meal will be a repeat of the pureed turkey bread mashed potato mystery vegetable they serve often and I really don't feel anything coming from the NH kitchen would be worth paying for. The thing is the dining room will be turned over to families and guests, so I'm uncertain what will happen to mom and I, plus staff there have responded with disbelief when I've mentioned no one in our family bought a ticket. I suppose it's mostly that I'm becoming increasingly inflexible and change of any kind causes anxiety.... the consequence of spending too many years alone.

Mend; Tell me WHY you would feel "worse"if you arranged for professional care in a facility and acted as a loving advocate for you dad?

We did that for my mom; it worked out for 4 years. Let me tell you; just being there, visiting, arranging, coordinating, adjusting, taking her out to appointments was plenty of work. We NEVER felt as though we were neglecting her. The care staff was MUCH better at caring for her day to day needs that I would ever have been and they had the medical expertise to figure out when she was getting ill.

What? You mean a caregiver can have feelings…. wow!!! Thanks for being a thread I can share burnout with. Yes, I am burned out but remind myself it would feel worse if I put my Father in a facility. He's doing good in so many ways. He can use the toilet, bathe, feed himself if I cook, and even makes his bed every morning. He just can't live alone or even be left alone. He's a good guy… I just can't go anywhere or do anything without him. All I wanted was a vacation after I retired…
I've called places that offer overnight services. OMG they are outrageously expensive. Soooo, I do the best I can knowing I'm depressed while at the same time thankful I'm in a position to take care of my Dad.

Gershun, if the risk of bunny-boilers, STDs, angry husbands, righteous spouses, humiliation, robbery, involvement with human traffickers and all the other ills that attend fooling around don't stop them, why would the distant possibility that one day they might be famous enough for someone to cash in?

We are expecting them to overcome a rather deeply embedded imperative, there.

It's alarming how many men, in the public eye, no less are stupid enough to let their other head dictate how they live their life. I guess they never imagined they would get famous enough to where their past indiscretions would come back to haunt them.

Let that be a lesson to everyone........if you want to become a President, actor or sports figure, remember eyes are watching.

ROFL...!

"Even Kennedy was a known flirt" - hoots!!!

Can I nominate that as my understatement of the decade?

I am beginning to think it might be much quicker and less depressing to list those among the rich and powerful who have NOT ever taken advantage of their position.

Yes, I second that Madge!

Send,
Hope you're not stuck under the sink still

With the "me too" movement, now maybe those with young grand-daughters won't need to go through what some of us older gals had to deal with.... which was considered the norm by the older generations, it was just something we had to deal with. I rarely had any issues, I was too much of a "tom boy" in my youth and early adult hood.

I have a good friend who was and still is constantly sexually harassed because of her looks. She looks like Samantha from "Sex in the City". She kept her ground and didn't take this casually. She knew exactly how to put that person in his place.

Pamzimmrrt, I bet a lot of older men are thinking who is going to come out of the woodwork regarding them, but things were different back then.

I think we need to concentrate on the more current group of men [and women] who are doing any harassing.

I meant not safe from accusations,, and probably no woman either!

Have a nice dinner!
We are in late-nite plumbing trouble-the vanity sink that never really got installed has issues at the drain and elsewhere. There was a bucket under the trap (always, because I never trust plumbing not to leak) and a leak-the bucket was filled.

Going to have to intervene and force a stopping point now.

Pammzi,  Can you please explain in what context did you mean that "no man is safe anymore?".
Did you mean not safe from accusations?  Or something else?

Ha ha yes

He put things a bit into perspective on the topic last night - maybe you can catch it on you tube if not HBO

Just eating dinner - be back in a bit

Yes, Bill Maher. I think we get him sometimes here in ol Canada eh!

Now, there's a man who doesn't give a whit what anyone thinks. I think I'd like to get a talk show and just run my mouth off all day. What fun!

Yeah, I had my share of unwanted sexual attention in my day. I was pretty good at putting people in their place. There is flirtation and then there is harassment. Some men can't tell the difference. And women..........Did anyone see that movie with Michael Douglas and Demi Moore. I forget what it was called. She sexually harassed him in the movie.

Aw, now YOU ARE getting political MsMadge! Which b o r d e r. ????

Do you folks north of the border get Bill Mahr on HBO?

Wow! I made it to the bigtime! My comment was erased and edited just before posting!
These admins are really good! Really fast!

As far as Harvey W.. and all the other hundreds of accusers of famous men coming out of the woodwork,, I sort of feel that no man is safe any longer! No man at all! I sure know that when I was a young single gal.. lots of men/boys got frisky with me! Too bad none of them are famous now..LOL. I could make a bundle! Its become so common that I sort of ignore it. I mean really,, not to downplay real abuse.. but even Kennedy was a known flirt.. I don't mean to start a problem,, but this has been going on forever, and even women can be "buttslappers"

Oh meh, thanks FF.!!!

Must have run out of things to worry about on a Saturday nite!
Was just wondering if Santa will change his hairstyle this year.....
more like famous orange hair with funny bangs.

You really should have gone just to check out Santa, Cwillie. A sort of preview to see if the kiddies will be safe this year, or scared.

Send, it's been awhile since I seen or heard someone use the word "meh". I forget when it first became popular, then it seemed to have faded away. I also like the word :)

Oh, it means "expressing a lack of interest or enthusiasm". Simply "whatever".