Hey folks, welcome to the new whine/general topic thread. Feel free to use this thread to discuss anything that is on your mind. Caregiving- related stuff, life after a loved one's death, your own emotional wellbeing. Whatever..........anything on your mind.
My mother now refuses to answer questions like "How are you?" and "Are you feeling well?" Three ways I get around this:
1 - Ask "Are you still feeling X?" Usually does the trick, but does not works always. Asking "Did you had any dificulties sleeping tonight?" will generate answer like "I've being taking medicines to sleep for ten years now. What a stupid question. I don't know what kind of son does not know blah, blah, blah."
2 - Complain about something minor. "It took hours for me to sleep tonight." may generate an answer about her night. Likewise "I think I am geting a cold, my head/nose is X". Anything more serious will cause her to shover me with questions and pills.
3 - Ask if she called an older friend latelly, and listen to the convo. Usually she will tell the person on the phone everything she is feeling. Be sure to rotate the friends.
Do you have any tip on this kind of situation?
El Paso TSA persons automatically spoke to me in Spanish (Mexican?) I totally did not understand what they said. Fortunately, I'm great at mimicking their hand gestures.... Just face forward and raise your hands up. Standing blocking your path with a wand? Oh, … just stand and don't move....
Fortunately, last minute, my guts urgently told me to hide my real jewelry and emergency cash. That it wasn't safe in the house. I contacted fave sis and asked her if she can come by and take it. This was the night before I flew. It is very obvious that someone went through all the cabinets. My checkbook, in the shelf, was moved to another location, in another room. It took me 2 days to finally find it....
I arrived home at 11:30pm. I was locked out. I had the key to the security screen doors but Not the wooden doors. Once oldest sis was awoken to let me in - she went on and on about the burner is broken, the kitchen window is stuck on high and can't close at all (rain and intruder can easily come in), etc... I tuned her out. I was tired. The house furnishings was rearranged, the bedrooms were dusty and I was sneezing galore... Oh... did I mention that the landline phone started ringing and it was buried behind a lot of rearranged furnishings. If there was a fire, it would be close to impossible to reach that phone hidden behind all those stuff!!!! … I wonder what my nephew took while I was gone?
I stuffed myself with as much ribs as I could. I tried Texas Roadhouse and Famous Dave. Famous Dave won hands down. Oh! I don't care for pizza because it causes my acid reflux to act up. On the last night in ABQ, we ordered pizza from Fox's Pizza Den. It was delicious! It wasn't salty or drowned in tomato sauce. It was like 9pm when we ate it - and no reflux at all... Oh! We ate at Moo Yah. I usually stick to cheeseburger. I decided to be adventurous and ordered The Best Quesonario because it had Jalapenos (I usually add this on my Subway sandwiches). The sauce of that burger!!! Too bad I was leaving soon. I would have asked them if we can eat there again. I don't know what the sauce is for that burger but it was delicious....
At the ELP museum, I asked the guards if I can take photos. They said yes. I was practically taking lots of selfies. This western painting reminded me of my dad's favorite movies - Western. Renaissance portrait (America's original home country before they separated). Colonist portrait (America's fight for Independence from England). George Washington (America's first President). A man falling backward (positioned myself below him where he would land on my head -posted that in FB with a witty sentence.) The security guard entered the room, saw me taking selfies. He smiled and did a thumbs up. I smiled back and thumbs up back to him. Out of all the patrons, I was sooooo touristy. A bit embarrassing, too.
As for the house - maybe it is fate giving you a nudge to start shedding the past and making it truly your own.
And where was your sister while all this was going on?
Does anyone know what happened to Becky. The Lady who lost her husband PJ? There was a brief period I wasn't on as much, so I may have missed something. But I was just wondering about her.
What a vacation! Loved your posts.
Always appreciate your wit and ability to write poetry, and little dittys.
Recently saw some men in white coats, going door to door in my neighborhood.
They said there were mice seen in the neighborhood......Lol.
Of course I was watching the bird. Turns out that the advice is not to look it straight in the eyes, it will think you are a predator!
Omg. My bird is scared of me?
Toys, Perches, too much in the cage. Bird needs to fly around for exercise. I bought a tall round cage.....the wrong one.
It is not enough it has it's own room?
Sheesh, the bird moved in with me! It chose me! Everything else is a learning experience. Now, I think I must learn Spanish, because the bird loves and responds to the Spanish-speaking radio.
Feeling inadequate much?
They were not exactly nice young men.......
Take me away, Calgon.
T h a t. w a s. a l l. S o. s I l l y. Yeah!
Or possibly the time change?
My nephew from Colorado kept pushing me into leaving the island and moving there to the US. When I kept saying no, he finally asked – repeatedly Why won’t I move there. I just kept saying no. I was getting so upset on his pushiness. He even said that I can move in with his mom. Older sis gave him ‘this look’ which means ‘Hell, no!’. I think he’s going to hear from her privately about offering That!
I’m an island girl. I can see myself moving to Hawaii but not to the Mainland. I love the beaches (although I avoid it like the plague.) I know it's there, if I ever feel the need to watch the waves. I love the coconut trees (not palm trees), the friendliness to and from strangers, and the laid back attitude, atmosphere.
When I was in the states, I tried so hard not to be friendly to strangers. I tried to avoid eye contact. And failed miserably repeatedly. I was friendly to everyone, to strangers. And they were friendly back to me.
Thanks, Send. You got yourself a new pet? Not a cat like everyone else here on AC? I used to watch that TV reality show of the cat whisperer doctor. I never realized what it takes to have a cat. They need a wider room (not just being caged up in small room or bathroom.) How you need to play with them, etc… Bird sounds easy but … be careful of it’s biting you (when trimming their claws) and inhaling their excrement. My niece used to tell me stories when she worked at the pet shop. Thanks for the chuckle on your take of those bird are videos.
The icy reserve thing has been on my mind lately, because a novelist explained it from a different angle. He described an out-of-towner eating alone (and lonely) in a city dining room where all the people "would as soon knock a man down as talk to him."
Of course! I thought. They're not being unfriendly. This IS their friendliness. In this culture, being friendly means you don't intrude on someone else in case they don't want you to. You no more strike up a conversation with a stranger than you would hit him in the face.
But when you showed those strangers that you DID want to make a connection, they were only too pleased. Yay! People like people! It all works :)
Costco do (or did, anyway) industrial-sized rolls of terry towelling wipes. You might want to get some.
Your parakeet's proper place is your head. You will just have to get used to the new normality of going around like that. The upside is that it's frightfully good for your posture.
Pete had his own ideas about that. Respect!
A parakeet poops every 15 minutes.
I really cannot clean and sterilize the kitchen counters that often if the bird Is flying around. The chemical smells will kill the bird, as well as cooking with Teflon coated pans. So it does get out to fly daily, in the enclosed back porch.