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I just wanted some thoughts/feedback on something that I've been pondering for some time now.


Since coming here in 2019, I have read about all sorts of people who are caregivers, and what they did/do in their lives before becoming/while being caregivers. I have often seen "I'm a nurse taking care of my LO" or "my (family member) is a nurse, taking care of my LO". What I've never seen is: "I'm a doctor/family member is a doctor, taking care of my LO." I understand that's because it is considered a conflict of interest (except in life or death situations) for a doctor to give medical aid to a family member.


So my question is this: why, then, is it not also considered a conflict of interest for a NURSE to take care of a family member?


I'm very curious what/why the reason for this is. Is it a gender issue (more female nurses/male doctors)? Is it an "ego" thing - for lack of a better term - "I didn't pay all this money for med school to change bedpans!"? Is it because of the job description - nurses traditionally providing more TLC, doctors actually doing treatment? Or was it set up that way to particularly protect doctors from finding themselves in the position that it seems so many nurses find themselves in ("well, you're a nurse! You should be taking care of mom/dad/LO!")?


I'll be curious to see what you all think. I'm especially looking forward to hearing from the nurses here about their take on it.

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Beattie, you're right about the personality to be a caregiver - although the thought of one of those WWF wrestlers in their crazy costumes saying "OK, time for your pills!" gives me a chuckle...
Daughter, very wise decision on both of your parts! And congrats and good luck to your daughter!
NHWM, my gosh, and I never even thought about nurse practitioners! I wonder if they fall under the same rules as doctors about treating family? If cwillie is right (as cwillie usually is!!) and the rule is because of prescribing meds, then I guess they would fall under the same rules...
And yes, that would be very convenient, cwillie, lol!
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Would be extremely convenient, cwille! 😝 LOL
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I always joked I wanted the kids to grow up to be a carpenter, mechanic, accountant and doctor or nurse so I had someone to consult from every area NHWM!
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NGE,

What a great question!

I don’t think it is appropriate to have a family member, a nurse or a doctor, treating a member of their family. It isn’t fair to them.

I suppose some people expect ‘free’ care from family members and others would never impose. I would not wish to impose on family members for anything, whether it is medical advice, caregiving, or anything else.

My friend and neighbor is a wonderful vet. He doesn’t even treat his own dog. He says that he is too emotionally connected to his dog to personally perform surgery on him. If he is uncomfortable treating an animal that lives in his home, think how nurses and doctors feel about treating their family members. It’s awkward!

I bet nurse practitioners hate it the most. They can write prescriptions. Imagine family members asking for prescriptions.

I have several friends that are nurses. I don’t bother them with health issues. I know plenty of people that do though. They find it annoying when others ask for ‘free’ medical advice. They are off the clock. Let them be. I don’t think most people want to be held liable for anything. Honestly, I don’t even like recommending doctors to anyone anymore. Doctors I love, they may hate.

It’s weird when you think about it. Would you ask a plumber to fix your clogged toilet? The mechanic in your family to fix your car? Okay, now I am being facetious, but you get my point.

Don’t mix family and friends with any kind of business, health wise or otherwise.
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My daughter is a newly minted RN, now doing a nurse residency fellowship. She despises being asked medical questions by family and friends. We ask her nothing. She says nurses aren’t qualified to speak on every health topic under the sun, most specialize in a specific area and only have a general knowledge of much else. I’d think doctors are exactly the same. When and if I need caregiving she won’t be my nurse, neither of us would want that
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I also haven't read that many truck drivers, IT experts, CEOs, professional wrestlers...

Although I did once meet a trainee pilot & an entertainer. Both were kind hearted men with fiercely driven Mothers, (who acted like their wants & wishes outweighed any right to a career or life their sons may have).

I think it's personality. Some folk just want to be caregivers, or willing to step up when it came their way. It's their calling you could say. Some may say they were the only one who heard the phone 😉

Others keep their day jobs as Doctors, driving trucks or writing PC code.
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Thanks, CWillie. Not trying to be offensive to any doctors here, so my apologies if I left someone out!
The prescribing medication makes sense - I was always of the understanding that the reason for the not treating family was the inability to remain objective if it's your own family member.
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The difference would be that nurses aren't prescribing meds or directing care (or not any more than the rest of us). And as we've seen time and time again nurses aren't always as well equipped to deal with problems as you might expect, for example a person who works in a surgical ward or in pediatrics doesn't necessarily have a clue about dementia or elder care.

And I think there actually have been a few doctors on the forum who were caring for someone.
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