Caregivers behaving badly.

I am going to poop on the floor and leave it there. My dad seems to think it is ok for him to do - doesnt wear a crap diaper to bed and expects me or my 87 yr old unwell mother to do clean it up. God forbid we have a discussion that it needs to change. If a man poops in the bed and no one hears it, it didn't happen, right? Or he visits others and craps on their sheets. But wont wear a protective layer. In fact. I want to crap all over my unhelpful siblings houses too. Fun with feces.

Scaredtaker.....True confession time:.....I was a bad brat and a couple of times I threw the sheets in the garbage and started over. Fun discussion thought: "Who pooped in the bed?" "I don't know,,,,,must have been that dam sasquatch!"

OMG I love this.. can;t believe I didn't find it before! So as for me.. next time I have FIL and he wants me to make his metamucil... yep, you got it!

And when he expects Mom and me to take care of MIL while he relaxes at the river,, we are going to go to that flea market I'm dying to see.. he manages at his house when no one is there!

I'm going to start ignoring my FIL, when he calls out from his TV room! He expects us to run to him, where in reality, he needs the exercise! He probably will just give up, and continue to sit there anyway, just to spite us! Grrrr!

Hey Stacy if he gives up you still win!!

A friend at work is moving soon and is collecting boxes. I have boxes and offered to bring them in for her.

Seriously contemplating labeling one of them "sex toys". Either she will spot it and think I'm a freak or she won't notice, will use the box, and her friends will think she's a freak .

Can't decide if I want to do it to one very large box or several medium ones.

Scaredtaker, the avatar and the blunt first line of your post have me laughing like I have not laughed in years!! It feels good to have tears of laughter again. I like this bratty thread!

M2M that is hysterical :D Don't forget to add an arrow saying 'this way up'.

I love this thread. Yeah Sendme! I love the line if a man shits in his bed does anyone hear it? LOL

I once did a whole phone interview for a job sitting on my toilet. Also I forgot to add earlier I also turn magazines with Justin Bieber's face on them around too.

Mom2mom, Is that a used box?

Gershen - I am 51 and was emailed a pre screening interview video taped "Opportunity" with a health care org. So sitting on the crapper while filming a dehumanizing and controversial screening method sounds in order. They can determine my age, my race, my gender and marital status from this "Screening invitation". I am so damned happy they went from what the company calls "Speed interviews" which they unapologetically compare to "Speed dating" style- to a more inhumane human resources method of taping yourself as you respond to a computer questionnaire. Now what becomes of these video taped sessions? Who owns the rights when I make it big in movies? In fact, I am going to dress in a batwoman costume and have a lawyer answer the questions for me or say important lines such as, "Objection. Leading the witness." clearly words such as rockstar health coach and speeddating interview style are indie hipster terminologies to weed out us older, antiquated prospective employees. My suggestion is not to patronize this company and let them know why. Now if you will excuse me, I need to take a laxative and get into character before filming my pre recorded interview.

Pammzi, Glad that you finally showed up here!
You are not going to give your fil his Metamicil?
Now, that really is bratty!

Gershun, Don't forget to flush, especially for all job interviews.

Talking to my sister too long on the phone, I flushed and she has not called me back since. One would think your own sis would understand.

Katie I am marginally happy that I was able to make you smile. Two points I need to enumerate for fun:
1. Are you sure its a smile and not gas?
2. I say marginally because caretaking has wiped the shine off my humor today.

In conclusion, I demand the fairy of freaking happidom rectify (ha ha I said RECTify) this fecal tsunami called my life and sprinkle it with a potpurri of enough is enough.

SEND - how many times do I have to flush before my idiot siblings go away?

Churchmouse, Don't you think M2M should label all the boxes she gives away?

Let's help her!

P o I s o n : Cockroach bait and flea powder.

Sendme2help.... yes, a used box. Maybe left over from when I moved.

At least they are boxed up.... buy me a couple of drinjs and I'll tell the story about the time I was out of town on business and my husband surprised me by having his entire family show up to pack up and move all if our belongings to our new house.

Scaredtaker, I usually flush three times. Lol.
You are so funny! Welcome here! And everyone else too!

When you post a hug, do you also use the smiling grinning baby? It would look so cute next to your avatar baby. A strong statement: It was the best of times and the worst of times.

Mince my opinion about crapped on sheets is probably not a poopular (sorry meant popular) one.

Crapped up sheets have no place in a communal washing machine. The foces or foaces or fekes or whatever the hell the fancy name is for shit has NO PLACE straining through my own laundry.

As if e coli is not enough of a risk factor in nosocomial illnesses.

"According to the CDC, the most common pathogens that cause nosocomial infections are Staphylococcus aureus, Pseudomonas aeruginosa, and E. coli. Some of the common nosocomial infections are urinary tract infections, respiratory pneumonia, surgical site wound infections, bacteremia, gastrointestinal and skin infections."

The number one nosocomial infection is UTI related. Why add a crapfest to innocent bystanders.

My mom insists on doing the wash. Ok mom. But ffs can we please NOT wash your paper undersqueaks or the dirty swiffer wet jet disposable maxi-pads?

I think washing my laundry in the river is safer at this point.

I love my parents but do not love feces and urine and moreover, denial of crap all over the bed and clothing.

That is, keep flushing until each sibling hangs up.

I know of no bigger turd than my sisters who left me with the steaming bag of crap. Draino wouldnt help at this point. This is a job for NASA

at the early stages of dementia, mom came to visit when I was relevant, married and had my own home. I was hosting a debaucherous xmas party and had purchased a vibrator for one of my uptight friends. I asked my mom to wrap it for me. She opened the brown bag and pulled out the massive "packaged package" while putting on her spectacles. She was reading it aloud and she paused to say..."Oh I have always wanted one of these!"

She may have thought it was an egg beater

Mom2Mom, Just have to hear that story, but just to console you-at least he took you to the new home?

Lol, Lol, Lol, I just love crap humor. My Mom had a good sense of humor. She told us a story about my younger brother. When he was still a baby he dumped his oatmeal over his own head. So my Mom proceeded to add some milk and sugar to it.

My sister was infamous for taking big dumps and not flushing afterward. She acts like her crap doesn't stink so I guess she really believes that. Next time I'm invited over I'll do the same.

Just found this thread and read through all 89 responses. The only bad thing I did today was refuse to cook dinner. I offered to cook it earlier when I still had the strength but hubby was not hungry then. Well I cleaned up the kitchen and ran the dishwasher by which time in my current state of health I was exhausted so just made a cup of tea and climbed into my recliner. Since I have been sick (one year today when my appendix burst) hubby has forgotten how to cook. I will try and think up more ways to be a brat!

Sounds like me at the moment. Can't get my balance back.

Veronica, One year today is being a really tough brat-proving the medical experts wrong-sticking it out-still with us-ready to be an example to us all. Congrats!

Needabreak, Welcome here. Are you wanting to try being a brat, or acting out badly? We can help.

Katie, How about turning the open sign on the door, to closed as you leave a business with bad service.

Who here on this beloved brat fest has a father who thinks he is ssssexxxyyy baby, kind of like a sicko geriatric Austin Powers who is showing off his groovy mojo for all the nursing home aides.......yikes,,,,,,,just kill me now! Argh! Oh, Behave!!