My mom just turned 90 a month ago. She's been under hospice care since January. Has CHF, and a multitude of other chronic things. I am her sole caregiver 24 hours, my husband is here but not really 'here to care'. I have one gal that comes in 4 hours a day so i can at least go for an hour to the grocery store. My biggest frustration right now is that my mom constantly utters 'oh my god, oh my jesus'. CONSTANTLY. She was doing this for about a year before this but now since she's been in bed two months, it's constant. She wakes me two or three times a night sounding completely distraught and repeating 'oh my god' so desperately I feel like there's something drastic happening. I go in, nothing, she just looks at me blankly. Doesn't even realize most times that she's saying it. I have 7 siblings, 6 of which live at least 1500 miles away. Not one will come and be with her with me in her last days. And I'm sorry to say, Hospice is a joke. Since January seen the social worker (Worthless in my opinion and my eldest sister is a SW with Hospice in another state), seen her twice. Woohoo.
How do I ignore this constant 'oh my god'ing'. Do any of you experience this as well? I know it's anxiety on her end. The ativan helps a little. Except for this, she's quite lucid most of the time and it kills me to drug her up just to sleep. Hospice wants me to give her other stuff that will have her sleeping almost all the time.
I have cared for my mom 40 of my 49 years. She has been partially paralyzed since I was 9 years old. I'm exhausted and worn out. It's a daily rollercoaster of emotion for me and I'm just so tired. I absolutely do NOT wish her dead. I only wish and pray for peace for her and myself. She is tired and wants so to be with my dad and her mother and sister and brothers.
Mostly just venting here but I am curious to know if and how many of you go through the 'oh my god' desperate plea.