Becoming a caregiver for the one you love will change your life.

A health crisis, in my case my wife's cancer, will create so many demands and distractions in your daily lives that your life will change immediately and forever. Despite your best and greatest efforts, things will never be the same.

Ironically, it will become simpler and harder as a new focus is required to be there as a caregiver for someone you love.

"Now I was facing Carol's traumatic disease. I knew I had to be different and I was afraid I would not be enough. The good news is I finally figured out I don't have to do this alone…I have friends . . . and our adult children are available and very supportive. And I know I can't heal Carol. Greg (a friend) helps me understand my greatest gift to her is to be ‘consciously present'. I can ‘be'. I now understand. I can consciously be myself and continue loving her. I can simply sit with her and be consciously present." (Excerpt from "The Dhance")

My suggestion to all caregivers is to simplify your life.

I will repeatedly stress the importance of acceptance. In this case, accept that you can't do everything yourself. Someone told me, "This is a marathon, not a sprint."

If you are going to endure, you'll need to take care of yourself. Many caregivers die before the one they are supporting.

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Who will be there if you are not? Decide which activities, chores, etc., you can eliminate, which can be relegated to friends or family, which you can hire to be done, and which ones only you can do.

"I am well aware that this last twenty-four hours has already changed my life dramatically and permanently."