Caregiver's cats behaving badly.

Let's chat about my cats, can we? :-) I'm having fun with them, tomorrow is one week now I have them. I have learned they are VERY mellow cats, in general. Perfect for me! They play some but mostly they hide in still unknown parts of my small 1 bedroom apartment, and seem content to do their own thing most of the time. Delilah is a 11 yo female and she is very sweet and cuddly, likes to get on the bed and lie around, get some rubs. Neither of them ever scratches or bites, though Divo likes to hiss a lot... not sure why. It's almost like he's saying to anyone around him "Just in case you were thinking about doing something I don't want you to do, don't try it."

I bought them an upgraded litter box, one where they have to climb on top to get into it. I hope this works to keep them from spreading litter far and wide like they have been. The water fountain is nice. It wasn't expensive and I know cats prefer running water. I've yet to see either of them actually drink from it but the volume of urine in the box tells me they are utilizing it.

Divo is skinny and I try to give him his food but Delilah eats it. I put Delilah in the crate for a bit so Divo can eat uninterrupted but he wanders away from the food bowl after a few bites. Ok... so he just doesn't have much of an appetite. As long as he seems healthy, and he does, I'm not going to worry about it.  Divo needs steps in between jumping up on things like window sills and the bed.  Delilah can do it w/o step in between but Divo can't.  So... now there are strategically placed things around windows and the bed do Divo can explore whatever, whenever.  High-fiving myself for being an awesome cat accommodator.  

The grooming gloves work well enough. Cats don't seem to particularly care for them, though. But when I give them a rub down with the gloves, it comes away with lots of hairs.

I think it's been a very successful week one!

It's far too early for me to worry about Divo, but he is a skinny one. He eats and seems perfectly happy and healthy, not uncomfortable in any way.

Cat weight talk:

I saw my trainer's cat today for first time. This thing is MASSIVE. It is so round and plump and I asked about the weight because... the cat looks morbidly obese, if adorable. Trainer said something about surgery and after that the cat gained weight. Hm. Maybe I'll ask about cat again if it's there on Friday when I go for workout. I've never known a cat that was so fat, but wasn't due to over feeding rich foods.

Moving on to my new-to-me old fella, Divo. He's quite skinny. I've been feeling along his sides as I pet him. He's thin, but not emaciated or anything like that. He does eat but doesn't seem to eat as much as the other one. I had a clear understanding with myself that in order for me to take in an 18 yo cat, I would have to be ready to draw the line if heath issues started to occur that would be too expensive. It's not a hard and fast rule, just an idea that I made clear with myself before I took them in. It's far too early to get worried about anything, but... I wonder if I should have Divo's teeth looked at...? He is quite old and he won't eat any hard food, only soft, and so I'm wondering if his teeth are ok. But what if they AREN'T ok?  What am I prepared to do then, if I get that news?  So maybe I'll just not worry about anything at all right now and wait a month or two and see if he puts on some weight with me. Former owner admits the cats were neglected due to having small kids to look after plus other pets in the household.

I like the idea of home made toilet paper tube toys for kitties.  This seems easy enough.  D & D mostly ignore the toys I bought them, but they were only few dollars.  

Only had one cat that put on weight after being neutered. Oh my gosh, she looked like a bowling bowl with legs. She did live to be 19 years old but had two strokes during her last year. It was amazing after the first stroke, she learned how to walk again with my help. But for many months I had to carry her and hold her up while she was in the litter box. She was so good about letting me know when she needed to use the box. I did keep blue sheets on her bedding just in case.

All the other cats during my life time never put on any extra weight. I don't know if it is more so depending on what breed of cat, or not. The cat that did gain a lot of weight was a short hair tordi. She would only eat dry food, wouldn't touch wet food or people food.

Pam, please be careful letting dogs eat cat food. Cat food is richer and can give dogs digestive upset. Dogs love it, I know. I have to feed my cat on top of a 6 foot high bookshelf to keep my dog from scarfing down his food. (I built a set of steps into the shelves so he could climb up and down).

Lucky Chloe is a puppy..LOL but the same rules apply I think! We just took her cone off to feed her as allowed,, boy was she hungry! We had no wet dog food, so she is eating cat food ( beef) Just a little bit. One of our tiny little feral cats got neutered last year,, he is now huge! Hubs is taking her for a walk now.. hoping this does not mess up our potty training!

pam...Good for you,getting Chloe spayed and I'm sorry she has to wear a cone.One of mine had to wear the cone too,but did just fine and was good about it and the stitches healed beautifully.
It's really sweet of your husband to care about her so much too.
I will warn you though,Chloe may put on weight easily now.Mine are all fat now,with kitten heads and cat bodies.

We just brought Chloe back from getting spayed, with the cone of shame on. Hubs is all about thinking this is silly, she'll be fine.. yep, right for the stiches, cone back on. She is still pretty dopey.. and they suggested we keep her in her playpen for the next 2 weeks.. this is never going to fly with hubs! As long as he is right with her it should be fine.. but I work the next 2 days... And knowing him he will probably sleep on the floor with her tonight,, he did with one of our cats. His heart in in the right place.

Carla one of the women I work with made Ming a toy/toys from toilet paper tubes. She attached different things, pompoms, ribbons, whatever she thought of inside. Fastened them together l, just with a rubberband placed them in a corrugated open box. My first thought was to unfasten them from each other for Ming to play with. Work mate told me no, just leave them together. I did but Ming had the same idea, they are now all over the house. She too loves toilet paper tubes with something hiding inside, or not. This was an idea she saw on Pintarest. I don't pintarest.

And this morning game. I am still in bed with my kindle and you all. Ming races through the house then races back into the bedroom, flying leap onto the bed, over the top of me, races off the other side, all while doing this little growl like noise, a few times. She once landed on me leaping onto the bed. I wasn't as flat as she thought I would be. Took the air out of me. She hasn't landed on me since. Must have surprised her too. 😈

Reading about all the kitty hijinks has brought a smile to my morning :)

My kitten loves to play with an empty toilet paper roll. Also empty pill bottles. Most cats like wine corks and pens/pencils, especially if they can skitter them across bare floors while you're trying to sleep. Also cords from the vertical blinds (they dangle temptingly near the floor) and charging cables left in the outlet not attached to anything.


My kitten will play with anything. My adult cat (neutered male) doesn't really play. It seems to be beneath his dignity. He will lie down in bed with me at night or naptime, as long as I don't try to cuddle him too much. Oh, well....

glad...That's a good one! I wish we had a ceiling fan too~
Mine follow me everywhere,wanting me to constantly entertain them.I need all the ideas for any other cat games and things to do with them that I can get.

Good game? Just turned on the ceiling fan for the first time since I got Ming. 😀😸

mally...another thing my cats seem to enjoy is a big bowl of water with 2-3 little plastic boats in it and every so often I go and stir it with a stick and sing Row,Row,Row Your Boat~

Ali,
Another good cat game is to put a fake toy mouse under the oven or the dishwasher.They like to bat it under there and then watch you get a stick and a flashlight to get it back out for them.

LL, thanks for the new ideas for my two young ones! The sheet over the table sounds good; they already love boxes, and there are enough windowsills for everyone - who needs cat toys?

hehhehheh~Good one Veronica and you're right~and isn't it just dear that they are roaming the house together at night as he courts her?Even says her name~

Luckylu there is nothing like a cute young girl to get and old man's spirits up. Had two other words to put in there but but I won't sink to new low of profanity

I'm so glad Rosie is helping your old boy with his depression freqflyer~It was meant to be,she came.
And Ali,I'm SO happy for you getting two kitty cats to love on.They will bring you so much joy,I know.Besides the toys they have,I hope they have a scratchy scratch too.You can make them tunnels under tables covered with a sheet and they love houses made with boxes covered by a big towel and they love a pile of grass brought in from outside and they love to sit in the window sill and look out the screen and you'll probably find yourself singing to them,silly songs you just make up and you will talk to them and they will chew on your toes like Holiday end's did and mine do and I'm just SO happy for you!!!Have fun with your new babies~

So Ali you have finally become a mother even if your ofspring have four legs. Think of the money you will save not having to raise the human kind. They have their own clothes, don't need pocket money, cars or college tuition. I am sure you will really enjoy them once they come out of hiding.
Put things that small of you close to where they are hiding and feeling safe then when they come our they will see you as security. Enjoy being a Mama.

SKG, I think only you can know when it's time to humanely euthanize. Such a tough decision, and a tough situation, you have my sympathy.

You've been at this caregiving business a very long time at this point, you need support. I'm glad you've joined us here on AgingCare.

SKGCaregiver with two incontinent elders. That is a very difficult position to be in. Would it be possible to make one room the cat's room. You know plastic on the floor covered with old washable rugs, sheets etc. You are obviously very fond of the kitty and you and hubby will miss him a lot. If he is still eating and drinking and seems happy I would personally hate to say goodbye at this stage. Once he begins to show distress I would not hesitate to take the kindest decision. Once it is clearly time I never wait to make that decision, mostly dogs, some cats and quite a few horses. The horses are always the hardest as they are so big.
Putting the cat to sleep will not really make your job of careing for hubby any easier so I would suggest getting more help careing for hubby so you are not so stressed. It has already been a long road for you and there is no predicting how long the rest of your journey will be. Do what feels right for you. No guilt involved. When the time has to come there will be not doubt in your mind what needs to be done. Many hugs.

Wow! SusanA and freqflyer,

I was both a "forum virgin" and a "communicator-with-other-caregivers virgin" until I wrote my post. I am dumbfounded by the kindness and warmth of your responses. It was worth the box of tissues! Thank you! Your understanding means the world to me.

SKG, many years ago I had a cat who was incontinent at the age of 20. What I did was buy a large carton of blue sheets that were "seconds" which were much cheaper then buying first quality.

I had to put blue sheets around the house, especially on the flooring. It made for much easier clean-up once I could see a pattern of where she was going. It was odd, she preferred the east side of the house. I even added more litter boxes for her but she couldn't always get to one in time :(

I can understand your situation trying to take care of two love ones which can be overwhelming. The cat does have a serious illness and you are doing the best you can. It is always so hard to know when to say "good-bye".   What a tough decision.

Cats can also sense when its owner is ill, and they can stress about that which can also have an effect on their own well being.

Ali, congrats on the new felines !!

About 6 months ago we adopted a rescue cat who was 12 years old. After a few months we thought we would need to take her back to the SPCA as she just wasn't bonding with us. She pretty much kept to herself. Then just a few weeks ago she brighten up and she has a delightful funny personality. Oh my gosh, she has us laughing so much :)

Our old guy who is 18 years old has a crush on her, and it is so funny listening to him "call" her. He can form words, and he is trying so hard to say what sounds like "Rosie come here". Of course, at 3 in the morning we can do without that !! They will meet in the upstairs hallway and roam the house at night.

Rosie has really helped the 18 year old as last year he lost his litter mate and another older elder cat due various health related issues. She has extended his life as he was so very depressed.

Ali - Congratulations on your new additions! I hope you enjoy your feline family members as much as I enjoy mine.

SKG -

I completely sympathize with the difficult situation you find yourself in re: the cat. I think I would be very concerned about keeping your husband (and yourself) healthy in light of having to constantly clean up cat waste around the house. That can't be a good thing.

I wish I could give a definitive answer, but only you can do that - if you have reached the point where it has to be your husband's care or the cat's, then you have to make a choice. It won't be easy, and I don't envy you having to do it - I would really struggle with it myself - but I think the health concern for yourself and your husband need to take top priority here. If you have to cover furniture with tarps to protect against the cat's bowel incontinence, it must be pretty bad.

I'm so sorry you have to deal with this.

I could use a little reassurance. I take care of my husband, whose health has been declining since 2001, and who is now completely bedridden. We have a 13-year old cat who shares one problem with my husband -- severe bowel disease. So in addition to my husband's toileting requirements, I have to keep cleaning the floors and all the tarps I have had to use to cover all our furniture, and every other surface where the cat is allowed. Our vet has said that, although he refuses to euthanize people's pets just for their convenience, in my case, "You have gone 1000% above and beyond with this cat, and I will be there whenever you're ready to say goodbye." My problem is that although I know his tummy is always at least a little painful (we give him steroid shots to keep him as comfortable as possible), otherwise he's a happy little guy -- very loving, very sweet. He eats and drinks well. So it feels cruel to end his life. On the other hand, I think I've finally hit the wall. Taking care of my husband is getting increasingly demanding, and after years of dealing with this, the added burden is making me kind of miserable. Comments?

ALI, I am thinking about those grooming gloves myself. Let us know how you and the cats like them.

Congratulations Ali, you are a cat-Mom now.!