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Hi everyone,

I've asked a few questions in the past (and was able to see the first couple of answers but as silly as it may sound I don't know how to access them now to read what others might have replied!) but if you've come across my other questions you'd know that my 63/4 year old mum lives with my 83 yrs old dad who has dementia with Lewy bodies and parkinsons & Alzheimer's of course. I have managed to get him signed up for a day centre 4 days a week it gives her a break for 5 hours whenever he goes. I also brought in a cleaner once a week to help her out with hardwork around the house.
My mum is so very sharp and clever she's also very calm and patient. However, recently she seems to be quite forgetful (though I forget some similar things too- and I've always assumed as humans we tend to forget a few unimportant things every now and then!) but I can't help but worry about her- im almost paranoid that she might catch the disease! I keep sending her brain quizzes and fun activities to do- I know she's stressed sometimes but I'm doing all I can. I take care her out when he's at the day centre and sometimes she just prefers to rest at home and I respect her wishes. She's only in her early 60's I pray to God that she doesn't get Alzhimers because there's so much I hope to do for her- have any of you seen a pattern whereby if one person gets it the partner does too? Thanking you all so much

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No, marital partners are usually discordant for Alzheimer. Other than Creuzfeld-Jakob, dementias are not caused by anything contagious. That said, my parents both had frontotemporal and/or vascular dementia, and to some extent that could have been due to their mutually crummy diet and lack of activity, and I do know of a few other couples who both had some form of dementia. Enjoy the trip with your mom! It is a blessing she is well enough to do it, and it will likely do her a world of good and fill both your lives with wonderful memories....some of which you might share with Dad too.
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Thanks blannie- the link worked!
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Oh crud, when you click that link above, you have to also click on "Answers" (should be in blue part-way down the page).
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Sue, see if this link will give you the answers from your past questions:

https://www.agingcare.com/Members/Sue861
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Sue, I think if you took your father to Egypt, between the long flight, the change in accommodations, scenery, people, language and other almost constant changes, your father might be so overwhelmed that he actually would be most uncomfortable. I think he'll be better staying where he is, in familiar surroundings.
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Try clicking on the "My Account" box on the right side of the screen, then click on "activity" It should be there if you are able to post...
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Do you think I'm being selfish by not taking my dad with us? I feel guilty at the thought of leaving him but I know he'll be very confused if I do. Yet I feel it's unfair for him not to be afforded the chance to go on holiday! Has anyone taken a loved one with demenita on hol before?
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Thank you Pam, I am taking her to Egypt for 6 nights in July I hope my plan works out - (looking to get respite care for that period!)

Thank you Frequentflyer but I don't have a public profile I just get forum options and an icon that says ask a question and one which says start a discussion!
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Suegirl, to access your previous questions to get answers is easy.... sign in... now go to the very top of the page to the right corner.... click on "public profile"... now your "account" will pop up.... click on "answers".
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Bear in mind that the stress of caring for Dad means interruptions all day long. Even mothers of small children can suffer from a lack of concentration, seem a bit addle-brained and disconnected because of the stress of caregiving. I seriously doubt that mom is sliding into dementia, but I would place a sizeable bet that caring for him is wearing her down. She needs a break, at least one full day a week and also a regular vacation where she is off duty completely. Look into respite care for him. If he is a wartime vet, call the VA for help.
Without some good relief, she could end up dying before he does. 30% of caregivers die before their patients.
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