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I'm wondering if any of you have gone on vacation with your elderly parent. I don't find myself needing to get away from HIM, so much as I just need to get away. Dad has early to mid-stage dementia, so I'm thinking a condo or townhome would be better than a hotel room. He gets around okay and likes to walk, but within reason for a 78-year old man with bad hips and knees. We'd like something near a city (casinos a plus) but somewhere that we could unwind quietly at night.

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Please note this post is from June. OP may already have gone on her vacation.
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Seattle Waterfront.

They sponsor the Seattle Citypass. In 2019 it was like 10 attractions for $100 and most at walking distance, including the charming argosy harbor side cruise, the aquarium, two museums, Space Needle.

About 30 minutes away, in Tacoma, there are two nice casinos that you can stay at, though I’d say it’s just as nice to stay at a Holiday Inn express.
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Check out some of the smaller casinos, some are in the more rural settings where you can also find a small resort style hotel nearby. A smaller casino may offer the casino experience but a bit less overstimulating for someone with dementia. After a day at a casino a walk around the grounds, check out a minor league/community college ball team, or a sit in a park watching wildlife may be exactly what you are looking for. We live in upstate N.Y. smaller casinos are popping up in communities that have refurbished the classic resort hotels offering a bit of the nostalgia.
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Sounds like Lake Tahoe (north is quieter than south).
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Isthisrealyreal Aug 2022
Just an FYI, north of the lake Tahoe is called Incline Village.
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JustVee: Our vacations with my late mother and sometimes her late sister were only one or two night stays at a beach locale.
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My LO had mild cognitive decline at first. He enjoyed going to the casino, but he'd get lost walking from one area to another. If we arranged to meet someplace, I'd sometimes have to tell him to wait where he was so I could find him (he used a cellphone). In January 2020 - just before Covid shut everything down - we went to Old Las Vegas. I had meetings, so it was part business for me, & I realized it would be stressful because he was becoming less capable. It was, but I'm glad I we went together because we did enjoy some of our time together away from home. We may have done more locally after Vegas, except for the pandemic.

Your situation isn't like mine, but being 100% responsible in a new environment isn't the same as being responsible at home. Some people say, "don't do it," but hopefully, you know what you & he can handle: Does he get anxious easily? Can he go to a public rest room on his own? How much activity can he take (walking, for example)? Does he need naps? Can he use a cell phone in case you get separated? Renting a wheelchair is a great idea. This won't be much of a get-away for you because you'll be on call 24/7, unless you get someone to go with you & share the responsibility. If you think you & he can handle it, make it a short trip & not too far away.
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Check out air bnb for places that meet yours and your loved one's needs. As long as you stick to his usual schedule for hygiene, meals, meds, and rest times... it should be do-able.
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Air BnB. A word of caution single floor homes with little to no stairs tend to go fast and are booked for long periods.
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Please try to ignore the negative putdowns and use only the good suggestions for ideas.

try looking for a bed and breakfast since they often have porches to relax on. I imagine you could also call a chamber of commerce or business association of some kind that will direct you to someplace nice in their town.

how about a town or two with a small museum ?

rent a wheelchair. They can fold and go behind the seat or in the trunk of the car.

if you listen to the negative opinions you can be denying some nice last memories of time spent with your dad.
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Dementia makes vacations in unfamiliar places and hotel rooms virtually impossible.
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"Unwind quietly at night" in a town with casinos, accompanied by a 78 year old parent with early to mid-stage dementia? Are you serious?
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newbiewife Jun 2022
Read the post more carefully. It says: "But here we have many state parks that rent cabins or condos,, nice ones. Some are near by Casinos or larger towns." The poster is talking about renting a cabin or condo in a state park--perhaps near a town with casinos--not IN a town with casinos. I can't speak to travel with a 78 year old demented parent, however.
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JustVee I don;t know where you are , so that may make what I say not applicable to you. But here we have many state parks that rent cabins or condos,, nice ones. Some are near by Casinos or larger towns. Dad could go to a casino, you could take him for a nice meal, or to a scenic area. He could sit on the porch and enjoy the scenery or read. So could you! It;s a nice way to relax and not feel overwhelmed. If he is a wanderer this may not work, but my Mom loved this sort of thing. Lots of places to walk, and nice people too.
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Isthisrealyreal Jun 2022
Pamzi, our state Parks rent cabins and they are awesome. The best vacations we take.

Except, you have to bring everything and no facilities in cabin. Showers available in the park.

We love them and have an induction cooker and 2 cubic feet freezer that we take to make ice for our food cooler and freeze any fish or crawdads we catch. Oh yeah, we bring our laptop and some DVDs for crummy weather.

Great idea. My dad loved these types of trips.
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JustVee, please note with even with mid-stage dementia, a person finding themselves in a different environment could be very confusing for them. And crowds a bit too overwhelming.

I am close to your Dad's age, without the bad hips and knees, and I found I don't have the energy to sight-see like I use to. My gosh, I use to walk all day long, but that ship has sailed a couple of years ago. My walking trips now are down the driveway to the mailbox.
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I took my mom on a cruise one time. Casino, everything contained, food, entertainment. It was pretty perfect. I brought a wheel chair because there is a lot of walking and I knew she'd have trouble making it from point A to point B in a timely fashion, if at all.
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Justvee, if you want a casino, I recommend Reno. It's smaller then Vegas and you can get nice, attached rooms for a reasonable rate and it is much cooler with outdoor activities near by. It has shows and other venues as well.

I have found asking for a handicap room gives you lots of space and easy access to the casino and restaurants.

I took my mom and aunt to mesquite, NV and it was great for them, both gambler's, but nothing for me to do outside except golf and that's no fun alone.

So deciding what you want to do will help you decide where to go.
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Not really a vacation or a break if dad tags along. Just you care giving in a differnt place. Why not put dad in respite while you get a well deserved break?
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