My sister hired a lawyer to send me a threatening letter that I wrongfully cut her out of my mother's healthcare and I have abused my powers as a Durable Power of Attorney. My sister is claiming my mother named her a Co-Agent in my mother's healthcare (which she did not). My sister was named an Alternate at one point, but she never had access to my mother's medical and financial records.
In my state, Massachusetts, I found out there is no such position as a "Co-Agent" in healthcare. I asked her lawyer for proof that she is the Co-Agent, and did not receive a response. I did however, receive a letter that they are prepared to file some sort of protection or relief in court. What grounds can they seek a protection on? Don't these things need proof? And isn't this defaming my character?
The thing is, I hugely respect the genuine efforts you have made to preserve what's left of your mother's relationship with her other daughter; but if the objective fact is that that daughter has stolen her money… I'm just not sure you can afford to ignore it. You have POA. You are obliged to protect your mother's interests. I hope that thought isn't making you feel worse.
My mother has dementia. She is not mentally competent. Prior to losing her capacity (years before she became sick), my mother named me to take care of her health and finances. This was known to everyone in the family, and my sister even helped my mother to execute the Power of Attorney with an attorney.
My sister and I have not gotten along because I confronted her regarding finances stemming back to when my mother when she became ill. She had my mother sign over her house to her for $1, when my mother was unable to really differentiate "yes" and "no." I was living at my mother's house trying to take care of her, and she evicted me (meaning my mother had to leave as well). She sold the house recently and my mother has not received any profits from the house. I do not have money or time to fight this matter, I've already talked to several lawyers who have told me the cost to fight this will exceed $20,000. I'm really not looking for this anyways. I would just like to take care of my mother in peace and I'm not looking for a payout. However, my sister has made it beyond difficult to do this, and the stress and burden she has placed on me is taking it's toll.
As a result of everything, my sister cut herself out of my mother's life. She did not visit or call for a period of 3 years. Before she stopped visiting, she would come over to the residence we lived in and started fights which would visible agitate my mother. I would call her to ask her to visit my mother, and she would defer conversation to either her husband or she would call me a "b*tch" and hang up. I of course was not going to chase her down.
Back to the topic, her lawyer is also asking for frequent visitation, which I have allowed. My mom lives in my residence with my family. They are unhappy with my terms of visitation, and demand that I go out of my way to make it convenient for my sister.
I am unable to speak with my sister, as has requested all correspondence be through a lawyer. An attorney I spoke with told me I have a right to protect my property/home, and that if she's not a CoAgent that I can set any visitation guidelines I would like.
This is clearly a huge mess.
Going through lawyers sounds like a very expensive way of communicating. What, actually, is your sister's beef?
If you are thinking a defamation suit, it will be difficult to find an attorney that will take it as most likely the amount that would be recoverable isnt enough to make it worth their while.
What did the letter from the attorney say? I know it said you were abusing your powers as DPOA but what did the letter say you had to do?
They're filing for some sort of protection? Or relief? What does that mean? Is your sister trying to get guardianship over your mom?
I think you need to get an attorney.