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Speaking for the four hospices I’ve become familiar with, there has never been any predicted time or date.

My present LO has been “on hospice” for over a year. She was placed on hospice because her level of care warranted it.

My mother was placed on hospice when she began to refuse food or water, and soon afterward lapsed into agitated semi consciousness and then morphine was administered.

No morphine so far with my current LO. She is peaceful and relaxed, in spite of general physical deterioration.

I am totally in sync with your question. Those of us who love her expect “the call” at any time, painful to us for sure. Sometimes it seems as though nothing is easy in this world.

Hope it helps just a little for you to know that even if your question can’t be answered, at least it can be compassionately shared and u derstood.
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They predict by scientific knowledge for the most part. The breathing you mention has a name and they will explain it to you if you ask. It is called "Cheyne-Stokes breathing" and there are deep breathes, then a period of apnea when the patient isn't breathing, then another deep breath, and in a repeated pattern. Signs a life is in last stages are online if you are interested, including cooling and mottling, discoloration of lower extremities and so on.
Morphine is given to both assist in breathing and to medicate a patient to a level below the level at which we feel pain, even below the level of breathing, so that the bodies seeming struggles for breath and so on are not felt by the patient. That's the blessing of hospice. While hospice medication may mean an earlier death by some minutes, hours, even days, or not can't be known, but there certainly is less struggle for the person.
I am sorry for your loss. No matter the number of year, the amount of a good life, it is still painful to lose those we love and we all grieve differently. Only time can heal our loss and make our memories fond and happy rather than sad.
Continue to speak with Hospice. They are generally very good to answer questions. If they tell you things like "She is transitioning" then ask them to explain to you how they evaluate these things scientifically.
For myself as a nurse I am grateful you have given your Mom this relatively peaceful death; I hope in time you will recognize the great gift this is.
As to how long your Mom can go on like this, that is as individual to her as her own thumbprint is. No one can be certain; we read the signs we have learned and we make "educated guesses" and that doesn't really address grief and loss.
I wish you the best. I feel my Mom and Dad with me throughout my life, and I am 80, still seeing the world through their lives, still celebrating them. Your Mom will be with you always while you live. I know that doesn't address the grief; allow yourself this grief, for a life is worth grieving as it passes. Your Hospice can guide you in seeking grieving support and health ongoing. Their job doesn't end at the end of your Mom's life. They will contact you. Ask them for support.
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You're overattentive watching every reaction of your mother, because you don't want her to die, and keep hoping for a "miracle" that will allow her to stay longer with you. You're caught in a turmoil of emotions and can't expect to be objective and realistic. That is understandable and many families go through the same unpleasant experience. Hospice's staff deal with people dying every day, so they have become experienced at that. Like nurses in the delivery room of a hospital, who can predict pretty well when a baby will be born. I'm sorry for your impending loss. Sooner o later it affects everybody. It's something we all have to learn to live with.
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