No. I feel like CHF and advanced dementia killed my mother at 95, and hospice helped keep her comfortable during her end of life process.
I feel like a brain tumor killed my father at 91 and hospice helped keep him comfortable during his end of life process.
Realize that Medicare STOPS paying hospice once a patient passes away, so what would be their goal in "killing" them? Not to mention euthanasia is against the law and hospice companies would've been closed down decades ago had your feelings been valid.
Your profile says that you're caring for your 43 year old mom in a nursing home. I'm a bit confused. Why would your mom at that young age be in any type of nursing facility, and is she the one you think was "killed" by hospice? So until you explain a bit more, all I can say at this point is that hospice doesn't "kill" anyone, and I'm sorry for your loss.
I am afraid that we get these sadly misinformed posts all the time, yes.
Often family members are at odd when a person requests end of life care. Those not in favor of ending a hopeless fight often become quite "unreasonable" and in their grief their thinking patterns tend to go a tad wonky.
I can only say this. Hospice is end of life care and it is ordered by a phyician at the request of a patient, or suggest by MD when there is no longer any hope of treatment and a patient is expected to die. This care provides COMFORT and this is often through medications to prevent agitation, worry, sleeplessness and difficulty with bowels, bladder, phlegm production, swallow but MOST ESPECIALLY WITH PAIN. Pain medications are given in palliative care and in Hospice care in greater amounts than is normally done due to addiction concerned with other patients. And if there is any pain or agitation, in hospice, said medications WILL BE GIVEN. These medications will be given whether or not they may hasten death by some few seconds, minutes, hours or even days. They are given to provide relief from needless torment in a dying patients.
If you continue, after speaking with Hospice, MD, grief counselors, to have trouble processing your feelings please do consider cognitive therapist of Social Worker in private practice who is working with life transitions.
You admit that the level of medication they are given is more than would normally be given and that it speeds up death.
That's where the problem lies. Either the protocol of Hospice speeds up death or it doesn't. Those of us concerned with this level of "care" are making the very valid point you just made.
And, for those of us who had a loved one put under hospice care before they should have been, who were then given those medications at levels that sped up their death, we have seen first hand the consequences of this "one size fits all" protocol of just dosing patients indiscriminately.
I don't have an issue with euthanasia. I don't even think Hospice is *intentionally* seeking to kill people or running some sort of Medicare/Medicaid grift (although, it's possible it happens on a very small scale just statistically speaking). BUT, I do KNOW that it's protocol and view of "comfort care" is legalized euthanasia. Those of us who have dealt with it directly, just want that point validated. That's all.
We hear this over and over again on AC. Hospice is end of life care. When an MD orders it he recognizes that end of life is near and may come within 6 months time. Patients are often suffering from pain and anxiety. Hospice's mission is to provide an end to suffering. They give medications for suffering, anxiety, depression, shortness of breath and etc. They will give these medications IF the patient is restless or uncomfortable EVEN IF THESE MEDICATIONS HASTEN DEATH by some moments, minutes, hours, even days.
I find it very sad, when families say this. I can only refer them to Hospice again, who will give them outreach to support by groups on grieving. Experts on grief tell us that people will go to any lengths to avoid walking into the grieving process. They will often choose to blame doctors, nurses, hospitals, things done or not done, and ESPECIALLY hospice, which is there at the end. This allows them to feel anger instead of grief.
I am sorry for your loss. I hope you will reach out for comfort. And I hope already that there is at least some comfort in a life well lived, in memories, in the fact the person you so loved is at peace and there need no longer be pain, and you need no longer stand witness to torment.
What happened Ilovejzs? Are you strong enough to tell us? Did you Mom have ca and was very sick? It's so hard to watch someone leaving us whether they are in hospice or hospice in home. I think you must be really young and this has been very frightning for you to see and hear. I lost my father and I was 45, he was 71 and it took me a very long time to grieve his death. Because it doesn't seem fair that they would leave us behind. There is a group called Beyond Blue, it could be something else now but it is an online support group much like aging care. You can pour your heart out there and people understand and you read stories of other people's grief and how to take things day to day. Not saying you shouldn't stay here, though but wherever you feel like expressing your feelings. For sure keep reaching out, keeping talking to people, maybe your Dad and other family or close friends. I wish I could give you a (((hug))) Please be gentle with yourself dear one.
I feel like hospice helped my father at a time when he was so very tired and exhausted from years of slow, insidious heart failure. They had no interest in killing him, for the minute he died they ceased to be paid. They provided him with comfort, compassion, and competent care in his final weeks. What more could any of us expect? It was beyond sad to see my beloved dad go, but knowing his wishes I could never want it to be different. I’m sorry for whatever you’ve experienced and wish you peace
Hospice provided the support and meds that my MIL needed to keep her comfortable and at home. (In retrospect, not a great plan, keeping her at home--but that's water under the bridge.)
Her comfort meds were Xanax, Valium and Tramadol. No morphine b/c she wasn't in any pain.
From being placed under Hospice care to her death was about a year, exactly. Hospice most assuredly did NOTHING to hasten her death.
My FIL's oncologist gave him a whopping dose of morphine at the end of his life. He asked the 'kids' if they would allow him to do this to help ease his discomfort in struggling to breathe. I saw him pull the biggest syringe I've ever seen out of his pocket and stood with his back to the family and injected this morphine into the IV. (He was shielding the 'kids' from seeing this happen.)
FIL passed within 10 minutes. I spoke with the Dr afterward and thanked him and he said "you saw what I did, then?" I said 'yes, and thank you so much for your compassion'. I never told the 'kids'.
Hospice can be, and often is, a true godsend. May not feel like it at the moment--but what's the point in hanging on to life for one or two more days, in agony and misery--just to say you were tough?
We get this question and stories many times here.
I think Alva's post says it all.
I was very relieved when my husband went into Hospice and died, he was out of pain, finally.
Seek counseling if need be.
I feel like a brain tumor killed my father at 91 and hospice helped keep him comfortable during his end of life process.
Realize that Medicare STOPS paying hospice once a patient passes away, so what would be their goal in "killing" them? Not to mention euthanasia is against the law and hospice companies would've been closed down decades ago had your feelings been valid.
I'm a bit confused. Why would your mom at that young age be in any type of nursing facility, and is she the one you think was "killed" by hospice?
So until you explain a bit more, all I can say at this point is that hospice doesn't "kill" anyone, and I'm sorry for your loss.
Often family members are at odd when a person requests end of life care. Those not in favor of ending a hopeless fight often become quite "unreasonable" and in their grief their thinking patterns tend to go a tad wonky.
I can only say this.
Hospice is end of life care and it is ordered by a phyician at the request of a patient, or suggest by MD when there is no longer any hope of treatment and a patient is expected to die.
This care provides COMFORT and this is often through medications to prevent agitation, worry, sleeplessness and difficulty with bowels, bladder, phlegm production, swallow but MOST ESPECIALLY WITH PAIN.
Pain medications are given in palliative care and in Hospice care in greater amounts than is normally done due to addiction concerned with other patients. And if there is any pain or agitation, in hospice, said medications WILL BE GIVEN.
These medications will be given whether or not they may hasten death by some few seconds, minutes, hours or even days. They are given to provide relief from needless torment in a dying patients.
If you continue, after speaking with Hospice, MD, grief counselors, to have trouble processing your feelings please do consider cognitive therapist of Social Worker in private practice who is working with life transitions.
That's where the problem lies. Either the protocol of Hospice speeds up death or it doesn't. Those of us concerned with this level of "care" are making the very valid point you just made.
And, for those of us who had a loved one put under hospice care before they should have been, who were then given those medications at levels that sped up their death, we have seen first hand the consequences of this "one size fits all" protocol of just dosing patients indiscriminately.
I don't have an issue with euthanasia. I don't even think Hospice is *intentionally* seeking to kill people or running some sort of Medicare/Medicaid grift (although, it's possible it happens on a very small scale just statistically speaking). BUT, I do KNOW that it's protocol and view of "comfort care" is legalized euthanasia. Those of us who have dealt with it directly, just want that point validated. That's all.
Hospice is end of life care. When an MD orders it he recognizes that end of life is near and may come within 6 months time.
Patients are often suffering from pain and anxiety.
Hospice's mission is to provide an end to suffering. They give medications for suffering, anxiety, depression, shortness of breath and etc. They will give these medications IF the patient is restless or uncomfortable EVEN IF THESE MEDICATIONS HASTEN DEATH by some moments, minutes, hours, even days.
I find it very sad, when families say this. I can only refer them to Hospice again, who will give them outreach to support by groups on grieving.
Experts on grief tell us that people will go to any lengths to avoid walking into the grieving process. They will often choose to blame doctors, nurses, hospitals, things done or not done, and ESPECIALLY hospice, which is there at the end. This allows them to feel anger instead of grief.
I am sorry for your loss. I hope you will reach out for comfort. And I hope already that there is at least some comfort in a life well lived, in memories, in the fact the person you so loved is at peace and there need no longer be pain, and you need no longer stand witness to torment.
There is a group called Beyond Blue, it could be something else now but it is an online support group much like aging care. You can pour your heart out there and people understand and you read stories of other people's grief and how to take things day to day.
Not saying you shouldn't stay here, though but wherever you feel like expressing your feelings.
For sure keep reaching out, keeping talking to people, maybe your Dad and other family or close friends. I wish I could give you a (((hug))) Please be gentle with yourself dear one.
Her comfort meds were Xanax, Valium and Tramadol. No morphine b/c she wasn't in any pain.
From being placed under Hospice care to her death was about a year, exactly. Hospice most assuredly did NOTHING to hasten her death.
My FIL's oncologist gave him a whopping dose of morphine at the end of his life. He asked the 'kids' if they would allow him to do this to help ease his discomfort in struggling to breathe. I saw him pull the biggest syringe I've ever seen out of his pocket and stood with his back to the family and injected this morphine into the IV. (He was shielding the 'kids' from seeing this happen.)
FIL passed within 10 minutes. I spoke with the Dr afterward and thanked him and he said "you saw what I did, then?" I said 'yes, and thank you so much for your compassion'. I never told the 'kids'.
Hospice can be, and often is, a true godsend. May not feel like it at the moment--but what's the point in hanging on to life for one or two more days, in agony and misery--just to say you were tough?
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