The friend inherited my aunts property and most of her money. My aunt did not have a will, however, I handled many items for her because my 85 year old mother was my aunts only heir. It was a difficult task. In essence, I served as a quasi, unpaid personal representative for the last several months and was not compensated for any of my efforts. Now, the friend wants to name me as durable medical power of attorney, however, her sisters who live a state away are the financial power of attorney, her heirs to my aunts entire estate which she inherited and her executor and personal representative. I do not feel comfortable doing this, as it leaves me with possible making medical decisions for her until her death. I also have durable medical power of attorney, financial power of attorney and am the personal representative for both my aging parents and my husband. How do I turn her down without destroying the relationship of a person that I have known my whole life who is not my family member?
Since they are taking care of your finances, they should be able to handle DPOA as they will need to approve any AL and necessary expenses.. Best to have them be able to handle everything so you don't have to worry about AL financing, etc...
I am greatly moved by your confidence in me..What a wonderful honor. Thank you (hugs)
Your post is confusing. If Aunt had no Will how could friend inherit. Was there a trust? She was beneficiary. How could Mom be an heir? Was some of Aunt estate left to her? Aunt wanted to bypass Probate?
The friend no doubt observed and admired you for the way you handled duties for your aunt. Also, she thinks you’ll afford her the same free services. What she’s asking of you seems mighty presumptuous.
Tell her that you’re honored that she trusts you enough to ask that of you, but due to previous commitments you can’t possibly do it.
Then retreat and see if you ever hear from her again. If you don’t, good riddance. You don’t owe her anything, and you especially don’t have to let her take advantage of you.
Also, if your Aunt didn't have a Will how is it that this friend "inherited" most of her property and money? Unless the friend's name was also on the title of her home, and is named as beneficiary of her investments/Insurance policies, and was joint on her bank acccounts, the estate would need to go through probate and then most likely the next of kin would inherit her estate. This would probably require a consult with an elder law attorney. Sounds like everyone is making a lot of assumptions, but they should know the actual laws.