Your profile says that your dad suffers from depression. Is he getting any help for that, i.e. medication, therapy and the like? And why did you let him move in with you? It obviously isn't working for you, so perhaps it's time to be looking into assisted living facilities, or even independent living facilities(if his only problem is depression)for him where he be around other folks his own age, and have daily activities to go to, and have some fun. He doesn't sound like he's having much fun living with you, nor are you having any fun having him there so it's obviously time for a change. And I think it's probably you that is needing the "nerve pill" more than your dad, so again time to make some long overdue changes.
Have you called social services for your county to see if there's any in-home services he would qualify for, like light housekeeping, food prep and hygiene? Some help may be better than none at all. Plus another person in the house takes his focus off of you.
Everything about dementia is hard. Caregiving gets harder and harder.
Are you his PoA? Is anyone? Is so, read the document to see when your authority is activated. This may help you transition him to facility care, if this is something you are willing to consider. Then he gets all the care he needs and you get your life back.
If no one is his PoA, then definitely call social services and talk to a social worker. If he gets agitated, or does anything threatening to you (even just verbally) or has a delusion or hallucination, call 911 and tell them something's wrong with him. Once he's in the ER you tell the staff he is an unsafe discharge and then do not take him back home. This may or may not work if he appears to have "normal" cognition to them. He is allowed to go back to his legal residence. But this scenario is an opportunity to get him out and for you to create a change in the arrangement.
Cognitive impairment only gets worse and so does the person's behaviors and caregiving needs. You need to think through a realistic plan. I wish you clarity, wisdom and peace in your heart!
And why did you let him move in with you? It obviously isn't working for you, so perhaps it's time to be looking into assisted living facilities, or even independent living facilities(if his only problem is depression)for him where he be around other folks his own age, and have daily activities to go to, and have some fun.
He doesn't sound like he's having much fun living with you, nor are you having any fun having him there so it's obviously time for a change.
And I think it's probably you that is needing the "nerve pill" more than your dad, so again time to make some long overdue changes.
Everything about dementia is hard. Caregiving gets harder and harder.
Are you his PoA? Is anyone? Is so, read the document to see when your authority is activated. This may help you transition him to facility care, if this is something you are willing to consider. Then he gets all the care he needs and you get your life back.
If no one is his PoA, then definitely call social services and talk to a social worker. If he gets agitated, or does anything threatening to you (even just verbally) or has a delusion or hallucination, call 911 and tell them something's wrong with him. Once he's in the ER you tell the staff he is an unsafe discharge and then do not take him back home. This may or may not work if he appears to have "normal" cognition to them. He is allowed to go back to his legal residence. But this scenario is an opportunity to get him out and for you to create a change in the arrangement.
Cognitive impairment only gets worse and so does the person's behaviors and caregiving needs. You need to think through a realistic plan. I wish you clarity, wisdom and peace in your heart!
Just read your profile.
Having a parent living in our home can be quite stressful. I am so sorry that you are going through this.
Vent away, if you like. Many of us have vented about our family situation with a parent.
Do you have any specific questions for us?
It doesn't sound like your current situation is working for you OR for Dad.
How can we help you change it?