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Mother has Alzheimers and is 87 years old, came down with Shingles two weeks ago. Since then she has gotten very weak and just wants to sleep. Only eats if we feed her, my sister and I take turns staying with her, when do we call in Hospice? Does the Doctor do it or do we? Doctor ordered twice a week nurse visits, not sure what to do.

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I'm so sorry about your mother's pain! Generally, the doctor will need to diagnose her as having six months to live, so I'd talk to the doctor first. With the pain of shingles and her weakness and not eating, she's showing signs of giving up, and likely the doctor will okay hospice. If you'd rather start with your local hospice you can call them and they will guide you as to the right steps. They offer palliative (comfort) care, which sounds like what you mother needs now. Take care of yourself, too.
Carol
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My mom was given 6 months to live. Diagnosed with congestive heart failure. Doctor recommended hospice, but I didn't want to do it!! Finally after 4 months of ER visits and emergencies of all kinds, we called in hospice. They were wonderful! The care my mom received was first rate. She was made comfortable and I was relieved that she had the care she needed in her own home. My mom passed away 5 months to the day the doctor had predicted. Hospice was there at the end and offered grief support for a year after her passing. Please don't hesitate if your loved one needs care!
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Colslif,

Here are two great AgingCare articles that can help you learn more about hospice and the right time to call.

Your Parent is Dying: When Is It Time to Call Hospice?
https://www.agingcare.com/articles/When-Is-It-Time-To-Contact-Hospice-110692.htm

and

Hospice and Palliative Care: Helping During End Stages of Life
https://www.agingcare.com/articles/Hospice-and-Palliative-Care-Helping-People-Die-96209.htm

Hope this helps,
Karie
AgingCare.com Team
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Often doctors are reluctant to recommend or suggest hospice care because they do not want to deal with the emotional fallout that may occur. This is extremely unfortunate, as hospice is the expert in providing end-of-life care not only for the patient but for the caregivers involved. BUT if the family of the patient asks "would (my patient) be appropriate for hospice care?" THEN the doctor will order it. So ask your doctor - better yet, ask your doctor's NURSE (often more humane and sensitive and has the doctor's ear). If you are not satisfied with the response you get, call your local hospice directly and request an evaluation. They should do a no-cost, no-obligation assessment to determine if your loved one is appropriate for hospice care, according to Medicare guidelines. They should provide you with the results of their assessment and discuss care options with you without any pressure one way or the other.
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You can call in Hospice to give you a break, a few hours here and there when they have been given 6 months to live by a doctor, will keep you in my prayers
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I was just told that because my mom is being placed in a nursing home for rehab she cannot receive hospice. The only reason she's going in as a rehab patient is because medicare will not pay for it if she is just going to nursing home. It's horrible because hospice cannot come if a person is in rehab. My mom is 87 feeding tube, non responsive to commands and her heart rate is very high. I cannot take her home at this time as I have another sick person here as well. The government makes it so hard on us.
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My mother in law (age 93) is having these pity parties and my husband and I refuse to attend. Are we wrong and what if anything can we do about it except just ignore her?
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My mom is going to need hospice, will have to call tommorow and get something written up by the doctor. She is dying, she has pneumonia and bladder infection that did not respond to antibiotics in the hospital for a week and they sent her back to the nursing home in terrible pain and confused. Unfortunately nursing home is quarantined right now because of flu virus, and I have been trying to get over a flu that turned into pneumonia last week from not taking care of myself while she was in the hospital. I could not believe that they sent her back to nursing home while she was still running a temp and confused and not knowing where she is. I think by tommorow I will be well enough to go over there, I have already had the flu that is going around in the nursing home. She fell and hurt her back at the nursing home about three weeks ago and still in terrible pain. She is getting hard to control due to her confusion. Would hospice be a good idea for her? I do not even know if she will make it through next week her infections. Almost lost her last summer due to same problems, and she got septic.
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I just answered some of these questions on imw124's wall about nursing homes, hospitals, docs, and hospice. please contact nursing home ombudsmans for your area. Also ask for infectious desease specialist at hospital visits. urinary tract infections can be sent out for culture to see what antibiotic is right for it and pneumonia may be confused with congestive heart failure have an echo done. Urinary tract infections really cause confusion. My mom is in hospice house right now and found out she is on a patch for pain that makes her very tired thursty and urinate less...........not what she was before. Hospice house is very peaceful compared to hospital and SNF but........now sleeping and no food or drink........she was eating and drinking. i am confused. Just wanted to share some stuff I learned along the way. The nursing facility should not be taking anyone in if there is a flu going around. There are many kinds of flu bugs. my mom went sepsis also with ecoli bacteria in december......nightmare after nightmare. good luck to you and your mom.
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