How do I place my mother in a nursing home?

Asked by Jennifer2636  |  Jan 28, 2010

I am a single mother of 2 girls. My mother recently (6 months ago) came to visit and decided not to return to her former residence (she lived above her sister in another state). For the past 6 months she has stated that she was going to find her own place, but she can't take care of herself. She has stopped taking any medications (she had a liver transplant plus is a diabetic) which are many. She refuses to take her insulin which she is supposed to be on 4 times a day. She does not do anything other than lay in bed or sit on the couch. She uses depends but doesn't even get up to change them till they are leaking every where. She won't even get herself a drink of water. I am constantly cleaning up poop and urine. I am at my wits end, I can't keep living like this, nor can my children. She keeps saying she can live on her own but I know there is absolutely NO WAY. She is also somewhat demented, she forgets a lot. I guess I just need to know what steps to take to get her into a nursing home. She needs 24/7 care and I just can't do it, I don't have the strength. Even when I can get her in the shower, she usually sits down or lays down and it takes everything I have to get her out. Please someone help. Oh, and I forgot to mention, I have siblings that all look down on me for not being able to care for her when not one of them has even thought of offering any type of help.

Answer This Question

 
 
 
  •  Answers 1 to 1 of 1 
 
 

Carol Bradley Bursack, Jan 31, 2010

Over the span of two decades author, columnist and speaker Carol Bradley Bursack cared for a neighbor and six elderly family members. Because of this experience, Bradley Bursack created a portable support group, the book "Minding Our Elders: Caregivers Share Their Personal Stories."

 

Yes, it sounds like she needs a nursing home. I'd start looking for one right away. You may need third party help getting her there - a good friend, a spiritual leader she trusts, or her doctor. But you can't do this. It's not good for her or your family. You can get Social Services involved, if you need to. Call the county.
Good luck,
Carol

 
  •  Answers 1 to 1 of 1 

Answer this Question

Please stay on topic or ask a new question.

Find Senior Housing And Care That Fits You Needs

I am looking for:
Search location:











Housing


Care


Join the Discussion

Have a question? Just need to vent? Find answers and support from the real experts - other caregivers!

Stay Connected

Sign up for our newsletter and receive practical tips and support for caregivers

 

Like AgingCare.com on Facebook