My mother talks non-stop, which makes it hard to communicate with my husband or watch TV. How do I get her to be quiet?

Asked by fiftycare  |  Mar 8, 2010

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PirateGal

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Mar 8, 2010

geez my mom has been doing that forever, and now I can't get a task done at her house before she's dreamed up the next. I think it's nervous energy and attention getting devices...how about some warm milk? Sleepytime tea?

 
 

pamela6148

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Mar 8, 2010

When I'm on the phone talking to someone my mom talks to me. When I tell her that I'm on the phone she tells me that I'm not talking to anyone meaning the person on the end of the line don't count. I love Basketball. If I'm over her house I tell her ahead of time what time a game is coming on. She waits right up until the game starts and wants to go outside and sit on the porch or go in the back yard or she's hungry and wants me to make her something to eat.

Many times she ask me to sit her higher up in the bed, in order to do this I have to raise the legs of the bed up, and lower the head down and on 1-2-3 PULL. Many times when I do this she has a bowel movement.

Right after I'm done with whatever she is asking me to do at that moment and I sit down, she ask me to put carmex on her lips, I sit down then she wants vick sauve under her nose, I sit down and she wants the spray in her throat, I sit down and she ask me to warm up the heating pad to put on her knee, I do that and she ask me to rub her neck, I do that and she wants me to rub her hands, they hurt from the arthiritis.

Suggestions to keep her quiet yeah how about a muzzel. I know where you can get them real cheap! :)

 
 

Eddie

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Mar 9, 2010

50:

When my mother lived with me I had a "Session in Progress" posted on my bedroom door when my girlfriend and I retired for the night, so she knew better than to knock. Another house rule was not to interrupt when I was watching the World Cup, a must-see movie, on the throne, or getting paperwork done. I enforced these rules consistently. I used to ask her "Is it earthshaking?" She'd answer "No, but ..." My response was either "We'll talk about it when I'm done here" or "Hold that thought for later. Then we'll sit down and talk for as long as you want." Most of the time all I had to do was stare at her for a few seconds.

PAM:

Your mom simply enjoys being a slavedriver and knows how and when to push every button. After all, she installed them. Next time, flip the script on her and make her wait.

 
 

pamela6148

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Mar 9, 2010

Make her wait........are you crazy? sometimes when I'm watching B-Ball I try to ignore her and she just keeps saying the same thing over and over and over and over and over.

Come PLAYOFFS I will go underground. I'm totally not going over there during the games. I've already explained this to her.

 
 

Eddie

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Mar 9, 2010

PAM:

Thanks for the laugh, I really needed it. I'm taking today off, as the mild stress-related headaches are my body's way of telling me this temple needs extra TLC.

There's a Chinese supermarket nearby that sells herbs and roots to make all kinds of teas as well as fresh seafood and vegetables I've never seen before. The prices are low, so I might as well treat myself to a low-cal healthy meal(s) -- right after a long, spiritually-healing bubble bath together with scented candles and Gregorian chants in the background. It'll be an out-of-body experience, that's for sure.

Good night dear lady, and stay in touch with your family here at Aging Care.

-- ED

 
 

195Austin

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Mar 9, 2010

I had that with my husband he would talk nonstop I would just tell him to shut up already and when I finished doing 100 things for him I would tell him I would check on him in 1 hr.and just develope a hearing loss for that time if you give an inch they will take a foot. You can not change their behaivior only how you react to it.

 
 

PirateGal

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Mar 9, 2010

Pam, wow she's record fast on dreaming stuff up. Wow faster than my mom she wins the First Prize...ding ding ding! Lordy be, wow...lol...it's amazing on how debilatated that are in one way but not in the next...wow. Was this type of stuff going on through the ages or is this a recent phenomena?

LMAO.....THE ROLLER COASTER OF 'MOMMY DEAREST'....

 
 

deefer12

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Mar 9, 2010

At least your mom's are asking for help and communicating. You have to ask my mom 20 questions to find out what's bothering her. She'll say "I don't know" to just about anything you ask. But holy heck, does she not sit still for 1 minute. You can count as many as 50 attempts to get out of the chair she is tied to, in the course of one minute. I strap her in her wheelchair so she can be mobile, but she never stops moving! Her OCD will not allow her to sit quietly, and her Parkinsons' keeps her from being able to walk without falling. The dementia is the added kick that makes her forget that she cannot safely do things on her own. I think I would rather have her talking all the time, as long as she would stay put.
Hope we can find a place that will take her when the time comes!

 
 

PirateGal

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Mar 9, 2010

def....yep there are so many different slices to the same aging problem. I feel sorry for them in a way because they are prisoners of their own bodies at times. Can your mom use a walker safely?

 
 

deefer12

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Mar 9, 2010

PirateGal, Mom cannot use a regular walker. We had to pay $500 for a MerryWalker in order for her to be able to stay at daycare. These are used in institutions and have seats, a crotch strap, and a wide stance to keep it from tipping over. The daycare also attaches a tray so that Mom has very little room to stand and walk with it.If she loses her balance, she keeps on rolling until she hits something. She doesn't like to use it at home because it doesn't fit where she wants to go. Whether she is in her walker or wheelchair, she keeps on moving constantly. It drives eveyone insane! When she is in the wheelchair, she forgets where the wheels and brakes are 1 minute after you tell her. She only weighs 110, but has already bent the break handles on her wheelchair, by trying to force them in the wrong direction.
When she is in a fighting mood, it's all I can do to keep her from pulling me down with her.
Her neurologist just put her back up to 10mg of Aricept, which is good in the taking directions department, but not so good in the keeping her calm area.She is definitely a handful and will be very hard to place when the time comes. In the meantime, my days are long and strenuous..But life goes on and some day it will be my turn.

 
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