Is this okay for my 87-year-old mother won't bathe or shower, but says she has a sponge bath?

OK this is a copy/paste from the forum "How often should my elder parent be bathing"?

My mom won't get in the tub, too weak and afraid she'll fall, (ME TOO SO NO PROBLEM).

We give her a sponge bath daily. She's 90. The entire time she complains of being cold, (God knows the heat it on 90), but we continue on. After the bath, I rub her down with Aveno and vaseline to keep her skin moist and not dry. I put Cocoa Butter on her face, and Touch of Mink on her feet. I also rub sachet cream and spray a little cologne on her so she smells nice. They get accustomed to a schedule and we try to do it daily at the same time, usually in the morning after she has her breakfast.

Elderly get itchy just like us when we go without a bath.

Hope this helps.

We put my FIL on a regular shower schedule, every Monday, Wednesday and Friday morning. That's when his professional caregiver gives him a full bath, which includes his hair. The rest of the week, he may either sponge bathes himself or with help from the caregiver.

He has severely dry and itchy skin with patches of eczema. If he does not get those regular baths and them lotioned up afterwards, he'd scratch himself bloody.

Before we put him on a regular schedule, he either tried to wiggle himself out of getting a regular bath by claiming he already had bathed himself - which was often not true - or he would forget that he had a bath and would sponge bath again or insist that the caregiver give him another bath. Now that he has this schedule, it's easier for everybody, including him.

BTW, when I mention that he sponge bathes himself, that's an over statement. (I secretly watched him several times.) He would fill the sink with water, lather up a wash cloth, rub himself down with it and then barely rinse off the soap. In the end, that caused more skin issues.

Although he would tell us that he actually DID use the shower, I know this is not true. He had had 2 falls in the tub and that's when he stopped using it. My BIL decided that his dad could use a shower bench and they "recycled" my SIL's. (She is obese and was using an extra large bath bench, for a few months, after she had had knee replacements. Needless to say, the bench doesn't fit properly, but they insist on it anyway.) My FIL is still too scared and physically not able to use the shower on his own....

My 86 year old Mother does not like to take a shower. I have a walk in shower and she still doens't like to shower. I have to fight her every step of the way. She makes every excuse possible. I have a headache, I have a stomach ache, I have this and this and this and this. So I let it go and let it go until I take her finally and say we are doing this today... I get in the shower with her and she has a sit down seat ... All she has to do is sit there. I do all the work. At least that way I can wash her hair. She will clean the private area herself. Which I'm greatful for. But if I didn't make her finally take a shower she would never take one.... But after it's over she thanks me and she feel so much better. go figure....lol

My situation is much like Shirley.My mother is 92. We have a walk in shower . I now
get in with her. Than I apply cream every where.I wash her hair every two weeks.
The rest of the week I use the disable wash cloths.i can pit them in the microwave.
She is always so cold.It works for us.
.

Probably having a schedule is the best way to go.