How can I make a judgment about whether my mother can use a bedside commode by herself during the night?

I had the same problem with my MIL and my mother at nursing home. We had bought a bedside commode for my MIL when she was living with us. However, I felt she might trip over it in some way as she did have problems walking and with balance. She used a walker, so the commode did not work out. We left extra lights on at night so she could easily find her way to the bathroom.

My mother is in a nursing home and can walk to the bathroom herself, but wanted a commode beside the bed because she didn't feel like walking. The staff did not think this would be safe for her as she is prone to falls and has balance issues as well.

But, if your mom walks well on her own and doesn't have balance issues, perhaps it might work. This is a difficult decision and you do need your sleep.

If there were extra lights on, maybe it would help with confusion? And she could walk to the bathroom. Hope you can find something that works for you.

Thank you for your experiences. I think you are right, this is going to be very hard to judge. I just don't know what to do. She does use a walker. She still does things I'm afraid she's not aware enough to stop doing, like holding on to the walker when she's trying to get up from the bed. There is probably some dementia coming, and she has cyclical depression problems which have a similar effect. I talked to her and she prefers to walk to the bathroom. Maybe that would not be worse than a bedside commode. But she might be opposed to the commode even if it's better for her. She's just getting sick of equipment making her room look like the "hospital." The cognitive issues make me concerned. I guess all we can do is keep thinking about this, and hope that we find the right solution. I really feel dithery about the whole thing. You don't want to do anything that could possibly lead to a broken hip or something like that. But you can't live without taking some risks.

Is there somewhere you could rent a beside commode to see how she does with it...? I would try putting it there and asking her to practice with me so I could see that she would be safe on her own... then observe how she handles all the moves she would have to make, getting up, getting to the toilet, how does she manage her underclothes, does she have to hold on to her walker while pulling her pants down, and how well does she keep her balance while doing all these things.... that way, you would have some idea of how safe it would be for her, and then if she doesn't mind and can handle going to the bathroom on her own, then let her try.... but most of us have accepted that gettting up during the night is part of the job.... so good luck and let us know how she does.

Right, I do feel it's kind of part of the job. I'm surprised that some people have parents who not only go to the bathroom on their own but even still live on their own with Alz. She went to the bathroom on her own with no problems for a long time. This might work for a while. I can make sure her "call button" is near. While my sister is here, at least, it's either that, hire someone just for the nights, or cancel my vacation! That ain't gonna happen!

I also wondered about renting a commode, but there are such cheap ones on Amazon I don't think it can be cheaper than that.

don't cancell you vacation,figure it out where you can go and do as you planned... If you cancel this one, then it will be expected of you always....

Well, you're right about that. But I don't think my sis would be that cruel. If I cancelled my vacation I'd be dead soon. It's just not optional.