I am the currently unmarried daughter, the one who was available when my dad couldn't take care of my mom anymore... She broke both hips at the same time and he fell down the stairs and broke his wrist. I moved home to Ohio from San Diego. It happened so suddenly! I was happily struggling to survive as a small business owner - loving it, even with the the wicked-expensive costs in California ( I did live 2 blocks from the beach!), then the next minute I was packed up, selling my car and getti...Read More
I am the currently unmarried daughter, the one who was available when my dad couldn't take care of my mom anymore... She broke both hips at the same time and he fell down the stairs and broke his wrist. I moved home to Ohio from San Diego. It happened so suddenly! I was happily struggling to survive as a small business owner - loving it, even with the the wicked-expensive costs in California ( I did live 2 blocks from the beach!), then the next minute I was packed up, selling my car and getting on the plane! I was the one who said I would NEVER come back to Ohio and here I am.
It has been 6 months... the first 3, she was in a nursing facility. Tho she was miserable, she was also not with my dad and so there was no fighting, I would spend the mornings at the home and my dad the afternoons, I had the afternoons off... I got to know them both separately, and it was a big juicy gift... I was so thankful to have the opportunity to bond with them, and I had time here at the house to work, call friends in CA, be myself, then... She came home. Now I am never alone... And every move I make must be known by all parties.
She is depressed (she is addicted to Vicodin) - she had an illiostomy 6 years ago for cancer and is weak, often sick, and angry, and still recovering from the broken hips... He is angry, (and now sneaking drinks) can't walk without lots of pain and 2 sticks and is convinced that if he goes to a doctor, said doc will tell him he has some horrible condition and he will surely die a horrible death on the way home in the front seat (!) am trying to restart my business, take care of the house and everyone in it and not have a total nervous breakdown! (oh... a social life would be nice, but I cant even imagine it at this point, a boyfriend, incomprehensible!) We have only one car because part of the deal was that they would help me get one when I got out here. My dad claims to not remember that despite the email I printed from him saying the very same. My mom just acts like its “all her fault” So I am trying to get the business going to save money to get the car, you know the whole story...
Help! How do you all do it? How in the world do you make friends? Is anyone else trying to run a business from home? Is everyone on anti-depressants? I need some help!
1/1/11
I am caring for my father, who is 79 years old, living at home and the primary ailment is general age-related decline.