Answered a question 12/28/2009 at 2:42 pm
Hi Petrie,
KelleyBean has an excellent thought that "staying strong for someone because you care", will get him through her passing. Afterwards, is where you can offer some important help for him.
...Read MoreHi Petrie,
KelleyBean has an excellent thought that "staying strong for someone because you care", will get him through her passing. Afterwards, is where you can offer some important help for him.
I lost my husband this past year and nothing has been more devastating. I've been somewhat prepared for many years, but the absence of his presence for the first 6 months was heart wrenching.
Many friends think that after the initial week or two, the worst is over. That is NOT the case always. Weeks and months later are the most lonely and devastating. One of my girlfriends brought all these books on 'coping' with a loss. Nothing in that considerate offering helped me. In fact, for me, I had to move past the sadness fast. Although some people may need to read, discuss and be counceled through the grieving process, I think some situations like mine needed to 'jump' over the incredible sadness and get to a happy place quickly if at all possible.
After a lot of stumbling around trying to find my 'niche' and my happily-ever-after-place, I can honestly say that keeping busy with loved ones in your life and a needed purpose, to get up each day is essential.
Try to find an important job, project, or study that will interest his personality. Volunteering in the community can offer loads of ideas for anyone needing to be needed. Help him with that.
Be there for him as much as possible. Morning, noon and night. Little day trips with a bus tour, weekend get-aways and full week long vacations if affordable, are an excellent way to move on to see and do something new and different.
Most of all, your love and smiles and hugs with happy optimism about a new tomorrow will get him through an impossible time.
Don't forget too, there is simple medication to help the adjustments if needed.
Good luck to you and your dad. ~Sooz~