Jsomebody gave a hug
8/3/2010 at 4:30 pm
Living the horror. People who are outside, or have never had trauma in their lives don't understand that it is more than a break or a change it is an uphill battle, digging yourself out of a hole, wh
...Read MoreLiving the horror. People who are outside, or have never had trauma in their lives don't understand that it is more than a break or a change it is an uphill battle, digging yourself out of a hole, whether you added to it or not it is starting at less than zero. It is easy to give advice, I do it all the time, from what I have read in books. For my life it has been bad a long time and it is going to take some hard choices to change it!
I hear what you are saying. It is like being in a battered spouse position the longing to leave and the fear, you know what is right, and sometimes you don't but at some point you know hoping it or he or they will change and things will just be good is not going to happen.
I am sorry you are in the position you are in, I can say I truly understand both your desire to help, your fear of what happens if you don't not wanting to rock the boat, the fear of being abandoned physically when all the while you are already so on you own it is indescribable.
I hope we both find the strength and determination to escape. That is literally what it would be, ESCAPE. Not doing something different or changing patterns, or making healthy decisions but escape, a jail break, getting away and being free and in control of your life for once and for all.
I hope you are able to as well.....
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