Answered a question 7/12/2011 at 10:37 am
I am very lucky that she has the funds to be in an assisted living home. She is now in the memory ward. I had her with me before that and it was most difficult as she constantly was walking without he
...Read MoreI am very lucky that she has the funds to be in an assisted living home. She is now in the memory ward. I had her with me before that and it was most difficult as she constantly was walking without her walker so the stress of constant attention was putting me into deep depression. I could not do enough for her care. She now has a "team" looking after her. I visit, closely monitor their care, very vigilant. We are working in a Montessori type activities with her, (went to Toys R Us to the learning section, wood block train, wood puzzles with animal sounds etc.) but here at this stage and age it is all regressive, never progressive. It took 4 homes over the past 2 years to get the right place. I have always had Home Health Care nurses that come out - they do physical therapy, X-rays right in your home or facility, nursing. Now Hospice is coming out helping. Not end of life, but for those who meet a certain criteria, unable to walk, need help toileting, washing, etc. They even brought in a small electric be to be lower so mom can't get up out of bed easily at night and if she does fall it is much closer to the ground. They brought in a wheelchair so I can cancel the rental we have. A nurse comes once a week for personal check ups, (already have 3 in the home facility) a volunteer comes out 1-2 times a week to work with her with the wooden learning child activities I bought for her to use, and to make sure she is eating and they help her do so if needed. This is all the stuff I do with her, but now others are involved so I am utterly grateful. I cannot give my life to my mom, this is her journey. I will also have mine when I am older. But I will make sure her care is the best we can provide and I am there for her, but I am learning to not ruin my own well being. My husband has bladder cancer so he is most important. But if I do not keep myself healthy mentally and physically, then I will fail myself and them.
We are now working with an Elder Lawyer to protect her assets and get her on medicaid. She need her assets to pay for what medicaid does not.
So when overwhelmed, as this is all continuing to eat up my life and ruin my business, I jump on my bike out on the trail and RIDE!